Hotwife Experiences

An Often Expressed Emotion of a Hotwife....To Be?

2012-02-02T20:17:00.000-08:00

I read this hotwife's story last fall and, while there was only a couple posts in her blog, I felt her initial posting described an often felt response to a husband's introduction of the concept. I want to re-post what she said here In the Beginning and give you some follow up thoughts

I've always been a traditional girl. Raised in the South by parents who have been together for more than 30 years, it was always my idea that once I got married I would remain devoted and committed to my husband for the rest of my life. In my mind, it all worked out beautifully and simply. We would marry, have kids and grow old together.

But about two years ago - a few weeks after my husband Mark and I celebrated our first anniversary with a romantic trip to Charleston, South Carolina - he told me something that literally knocked the wind out of me. His admission was that he fantasized about me being with another man. His fantasies involved me meeting, dating and eventually sleeping with a man that wasn't him - again and again. While he said he was interested in watching me experience intimacy with a lover, his primary motivation was expanding my pleasure, allowing me to explore my sexuality with others whether he was present or not.

The confession threw me into an emotional tailspin for weeks. I was hurt, angry, confused and not at all happy about this new development. I couldn't reconcile at the time - and I still struggle with this - how he could profess to love me yet still want me to give myself to someone else - to share my most intimate secrets and desires with a man who would be a stranger to him.

Months would pass, and while the initial shock of his admission had worn off, the hurt and sting surrounding the idea of me giving myself to another man did not. Over time, however, as he explained how much he loved me and how important it was to him for me to experience as much as I possibly could from a sexual perspective, I began to understand that his idea was actually an expression of his complete devotion and trust in me as a woman and as his wife.

With a lot of anxiousness and quite a bit of fear, I finally agreed to at least meet another man for dinner (with Mark present) if we could find a guy that I clicked with. And thus, about six months ago, the search began to see if we could find a man who could eventually be my first lover as a married woman.

I know - all too well - this emotional response and the Dating Wife and I share many similarities. While And and I have come a long way, I remember like it was yesterday what if felt like to have that conversation. Perhaps you've experienced that and are still dealing with the emotion. I know, for me, it was a struggle to get my little head around such a nontraditional thought. Only you can know if 'testing the waters' into the hotwife lifestyle is a path you want to embark in your relationship. Many choose not to do so...and that's okay. Others want to keep it the thing of fantasy....and that's wonderful too. Having a hotwife fantasy and never acting on it is enough for many. Still, for me, I can clearly say, this is the path And and I were destined to travel together. It's been such an eye opener...just how much our love, our interest and our communication has grown since we started this adventure in life. I can't imagine it any other way.

Flag Counter

2012-01-30T11:45:00.000-08:00

In case you hadn't noticed, we added a little flag counter down the right hand side to see where in the world people are visiting are site. We've always known followers of our hotwife story weren't all local. We thought about, at one time, putting a poll up to share from where people were visiting. But, we found this and thought it would be fun to share with you where, on this great big planet, people came from to read our story.

I only wish we had done this at the start. According to our site statistics, we've had over 700,000 visits since we began and over two million pages have been viewed. We (and you) aren't alone in our interest. In fact, we've heard that this is the hotwife fantasy is the number one fantasy of couples worldwide! We really feel honored that so many have taken an interest in learning more about the hotwife fantasy. When we began, so many years ago, we thought this would be as much about educating and discussing this 'alternative' life choice with other couples as it was sharing our adventures. Hopefully we haven't disappointed you all!

We are going to, for our own sake, add this map that, hopefully will update along with the side bar site visits.

Free counters

How we Differentiate a Hotwife Relationship from a Cuckold one?

2012-01-24T19:48:00.000-08:00

A hotwife relationship can begin - and subsequently develop - in many different ways. Sometimes it begins as a hotwife fantasy fulfilled but evolves into more of a cuckold and/or femdom relationship. Other times it may begin as a cuckold and develop into a hotwife. Still others may have elements and encounters that meet each definition. Each relationship evolves with it own twists, turns, spins, and sexual flavors and is individually reflective of the various interests, motivations, needs, desires, fetishes, passions, characters, and personalities of the individuals involved. Just like fingerprints, no two hotwife relationships looks the same. The lines are a bit fuzzy and for each there is a differing definition of what constitutes a cuckold and what is a hotwife. Here is ours and why we consider it more of a hotwife versus a cuck life.

A hotwife relationship can start in many ways. Sometimes it’s the wife’s idea. Sometimes it’s the husband’s. Other times it’s spontaneous, unplanned, and just seems to evolve through hints, feedback and further fantasy discussion. That is how it began for us. Some women, whose husbands suggest experimenting with the lifestyle, initially might find the concept repulsive or 'immoral'. Other women immediately embrace the idea. Many women slowly warm to the notion, dip their toe in the pool cautiously. This is how our lifestyle choice evolved.

Some women may have feelings of nervousnous, apprehension, fear and or guilt about their first experience while others gain confidence and become more self-assured...a confident MILF. I know Rach had feelings of each early on. This is the way we believe it is for many women. The first experience has many mixed emotions...a little guilt, genuine concern about their husband’s feelings, tempered by powerful memories of how incredible the sex was.

Interestingly, the feelings a man might feel are much the same and these may, I believe, more so define whether the relationship is a hotwife one or evolves into a cuckold relationship. Many men have some feelings - however minor - of “cuckold angst”. They may experience feelings...of varying intensity... of guilt, inferiority or insecure. However, many find that, after this initial feeling, these feelings go away and they are replaced by an even stronger desire to do it again. Some husbands find the idea of their wife fucking other men to be intensely erotic (hotwife) but remain confident in her activities, while others may express feelings of sudden 'inferiority' about it and are aroused by such a reaction (cuckold). Some men are excited and exhilarated by the idea of having to share their wife’s pussy with other men (hotwife) while others may continue to have torn feelings about it, are deeply humiliated by the experience yet yearn for the experience again (cuckold). Some men get an instant rock-hard erection just thinking about their wife coming home with a wet, used pussy while other men experience nauseating feelings about it (what here is the differences between a hotwife and a cuckold? It's certainly a different mix for each man). Some men want their wives to be able to experience sexual delights and pleasures that they can’t possibly give her for the simple sake of allowing her new experiences while other men feel 'obligated' by the opinion (or fact, in their mind) that they can’t compete against the stronger, more well-endowed, virile men their wife typically chooses(cuckold).

Keep in mind, what we've written is how WE define the differences between a hotwife and cuckold relationship. For us, there are still elements of both that occur and, I am guessing, many have similar feelings of both. However, we call this a 'hotwife' life choice we've made because we share in these experiences, there are only slight, acute feelings of 'angst' (followed by reinforcement) and we typically experience these encounters together or communicate fully before and after. I suppose one could argue that we've 'evolved' into more of a femdom relationship since Rach has now taken more of a lead role in finding lovers, is free to explore with or without my presence and is allowed to talk, meet and share with them without my knowledge, 'supervision, or approval. Still, she does share, asks my opinion (and values it) and gives me unconditional 'veto' power over any encounter. Ultimately, too, Rach is a submissive and, in our experimentation with bondage, spanking and domination, she unequivocably falls into the submissive role. So, for our definition, we'll continue to call ourselves lovers of MFM and explorers in the Hotwife life.

Sorry...the rest of our MFM Saturday Evening

2012-01-18T13:15:00.000-08:00

I had to stop my hotwife story yesterday (so scroll down to the first, if you've not yet read it) as I was discussing our MFM encounter Saturday night. Yes, I've kind of spoiled the mystery in the title of the last two posts! LOL I know I always hate 'to be continued' television shows (probably why I never watched a soap opera) and I am sorry I had to end when I did. I had just taken the girls to school when I received a call that I needed to come and get our younger daughter. She wasn't feeling well and was in the nurse's office. Needless to say, taking care of her ended my hotwife blog writing for the day :(

BP stood as we arrived and gave me a wonderfully comfortable hug. He smelled so good. As importantly (I would learn after) he looked And right in the eye as they shook hands and even gave one of those 'macho' man hugs. Obviously, the time we had spent sending texts, webcamming and talking on the phone had really helped to make all of us comfortable with each other. We ordered drinks and had a wonderfully comfortable conversation. I normally sit in between the two guys and this was no exception. I could feel myself drawing closer to him as we spoke and a tingle went down my back as his hand rested on my knee. His hand felt great as he softly moved it and I could already tell he was someone that would take his time and ensure my comfort and sexual fulfillment.

We spoke for about an hour before talking about dinner. I was much more relaxed, turned on and so ready to go that I was actually the one that suggested we go back to his hotel where, I knew, there is a pretty good restaurant (don't ask me how I know! ha ha). As we've done before, I rode with BP and And followed us in our SUV (this, my blog friends, can be a most erotic experience. Riding with the man you want to fuck while the man you love follows right behind in a separate car - especially when you call your man on your cell so he can hear the conversation). During the ride, BP and I spoke and I told him I wasn't really hungry for food. He smiled and asked what I was hungry for to which I said, two very yummy cocks. It was abundantly clear to And that, when we arrived, we would not be heading to the restaurant but straight to his room.

As we walked in, I remember grabbing And's hand as well as BP's hand and walking toward the elevator. There was another couple that followed us and got in the elevator with us for part of the ride up. I wondered (but didn't really care) if they knew. I wondered, secretly (they were fairly young and attractive) if they knew, would they want to join us. As soon as the door shut, I didn't waste any time pulling off my blouse and walking over to BP. He kissed me passionately while I And made drinks and found some music. I couldn't wait to get his belt and slacks off and immediately reached in for what I had been awaiting. It was everything (and then some) that I had imagined. As it grew to a full, legitimate eight inches (from the top, not the bottom ha ha) and filled with blood, I knew this thick cock was certainly going to be a challenge for my tonsils. I did the best I could and took nearly the full shaft as I felt my husband's hands on my back removing my bra.

As I stood, I turned around to kiss my caring and wonderful husband. This allowed BP to reach his beautiful hands around and cup my nipple-hardened breasts. As he kneaded me, I could feel a warmth below and knew I had to get out of my clothes right away. Pulling away, the guys spoke softly and grabbed their drinks. I was feeling so sexy with these two gorgeous men looking at me, I did a bit of a strip tease dance. They eyed me, smiling as they too began removing clothing. And was undressed first but allowed BP to come to me first. As I lay back and allowed his tongue into my mouth, I felt his warm hands slowly move down my frame. I shivered as he grazed my mound and my sudden vocal moan and my quiver told him I wanted him...NOW. He moved down and began tasting my wet, freshly-waxed pussy. As he worked his tongue, And moved up and kissed me, whispering in my ear how hot I looked. We've been playing with a bit of D/s lately and he was whispering some naughty words into my ear (for another blog time). I told him, yes, I wanted his cock and he slid it toward me. I quickly began slurping at it as my first orgasm approached. I had to pause, start and pause as BP brought me to a quick climax. He kissed me softly before moving toward his drink. It was my turn.

I moved to the end of the bed and pulled his cock toward my lips. And too moved next to him and I reached for his familiar cock, stroking it. I moved back and forth and these two men, who had 'man-hugged' and became friendly at the bar, now stood cock-to-cock at my lips. It is so wonderful to be with a man that, while having no thoughts of contact with another man, is completely comfortable if their 'members' happen to touch. It's inevitable and it's something with which any man involved in an intimate MFM encounter has to be comfortable. These two were.

After some time, BP pulled back. He was obviously about to cum. I didn't want him to yet either. And must have known as he joked that since he were the 'slightly smaller' cock, he'd get me warmed up while BP 'suited up'. This was a bit different than most encounters we'd previously had. And usually allows the other guy to go first but somehow must have known that BP was close and needed a bit of a break. We fucked slowly while he, again, spoke in my ear. He told me he had put the cuffs, we had purchased some time ago, in my purse and asked me if I'd be okay being restrained. While part of me wanted my hands on BP's ass while he melted into me, I knew this is something And wanted to do (as I said, we've been pursuing this play quite a bit lately) and I said, yes. He pulled out, asking BP if he was "ready to fuck my wife" to which he said, "absolutely". As BP entered me, I could feel the erotic stretch of his cock head. Wow, he was thicker than And. It hadn't seemed so much in my mouth but now, inside me, I could feel the difference. He began a rhythm that I easily matched and he began working his gorgeous cock into my wanton, slick box.

I could feel another orgasm quickly approaching as I worked myself into a frantic fantasy fulfillment. I couldn't imagine that this day would come. I was fucking a man I had no thoughts I'd ever get to experience when we first began speaking on AFF months before. Now, here I was fucking this man while my husband began cuffing my hands above my head. How amazing this journey.

This is getting too long and I really have much I should be doing so I am going to stop now. I will add that both took their turns fucking me, the other on my mouth before both cumming on my body. I do remember laying there, cum from two men on me as both sat/lay next to me. One on each side. We talked, laughed, talked some more before And allowed me one more fuck with a recovered BP. He decided to go down to the bar, said goodbye to BP and left me there to finish my fantasy experience (I had told And I'd love to fuck him alone). He lasted so long the second time that I, truly, didn't think I could come anymore and I had three texts from And asking if I was coming down soon, was I okay and should he just grab a cab. Ha ha. I guess we must have fucked for over an hour (I lost track of time). I called And after BP had cum again, this time in a condom - and with a swelling head that had me fighting for air - and told him I'd be right down. BP walked me down where we had a quick drink (we never did make it to dinner) and said our goodbyes.

The ride home was filled with, at first, post-sexual excitement. The last portion of the ride had me feeling the exhaustion from getting fucked good by two gorgeous men. When we arrived home, I slipped online, checked messages (he had already sent me a cute thank you message on AFF) and slipped into bed with my main man. I fell asleep in short order to thoughts of what a lucky girl I am!

Saturday Night MFM

2012-01-17T08:48:00.000-08:00

Sorry it's been a couple days since my date and I've not yet returned for the update. This little hot wife was exhausted on Sunday and the girls didn't have school Monday. Saturday was a pretty late night and I slept...almost til noon on Sunday! And was great taking the girls out for breakfast (keeping it quiet around the house) and they even cleaned up the house a bit when they returned home! I guess that was a part of going out for pancakes ha ha.

As I confessed in my post from Saturday, I've been pursuing, for quite some time, this hunk of a man that we met on Adultfriendfinder a few months back. He isn't local and it wasn't until this weekend, when he was held over on some business, that my opportunity came to fruition. I honestly have tried to convince myself he made sure that his business was held over to meet me but that's probably just my over-confident self LOL

We decided to meet at a bar/restaurant near where he was staying. It's a beautiful area of the city but even with a relaxing walk, hand-in-hand with my gorgeous man, I couldn't seem calm my nerves as we arrived. I was happy to see when we arrived that....we'll call him BP....had already arrived and was waiting for us. He looked stunningly handsome.

I want to back up a bit and give a bit background that I've skipped over. As I said, we originally exchanged messages on the adult personals website, AFF, a few months back. We spoke a few times but, honestly, with him living so far away, I really discounted ever meeting him. I thought he was incredibly sexy, confident without being cocky, respectful and...experienced. His photos had me dreaming of grabbing his cock and trying to slide it down my throat (something I've continually worked on is my 'deep' cock sucking skills). I also could almost feel his gorgeous manhood sliding inside me while And watched me take it and joined in for a blissful MFM encounter. It was a thing of many a fantasy, sex/pillow talk with And and something I never thought would happen.

We continued to speak and then, after I felt comfortable, sent each other text messages. Just before Christmas, BP mentioned to me that he was tentatively planning a business trip that would take him within a couple hour drive from us. I was excited about the possibility but didn't want to get my hopes up as, he said, it was a 50/50 chance at the time. It wasn't until after Christmas when we decided to webcam, that he told me it was almost a certainty he'd be coming the second week of January and, if everything worked out right, he would stay over the weekend and get a hotel nearer us. My heart raced, I instantly became wet and And and I had an amazingly erotic webcam chat (he remained a bit of mystery by not fully undressing....so erotic - the anticipation) with him. As it became a sure thing, we began making plans. Finally, here he was...that shy but sexy grin, that beautiful mane of hair and that hunk of a body I couldn't wait to touch. As we said hello, I could feel my little MILF heart pounding and the blood pumping through my body. It had been some time I'd felt such a rush of excitement from a man other than my husband.

A Busy Hotwife!

2012-01-14T18:21:00.000-08:00

Wow...the holidays sure are a busy time for us. It seems, every year, we take a bit of time off from our 'activities' to focus on our family, making the holidays special for the girls and having fun with friends (vanilla) and family.

That said, I am excited for this evening. We are finally headed out to a drinks and dinner date with a single guy I've been courting....yes, I said that right, I confess. I've been pursuing him....for quite some time. We've talked via webcam, a few times, spoke on the phone and sent text messages to each other quite a bit in the past couple weeks. But, I am still very excited, a bit nervous and really anxious to head out! If all goes right, we may be reporting back on a much anticipated MFM after a bit of time off.

I've also been busy with other 'online activities. Mostly, I've been busy on Kasidie. Previously, we've really, really guarded our anonymity on Kasidie. We mostly search out other men seeking a hotwife encounter and then correspond for a bit before giving them our email address (rather than use the Kasidie email system). We didn't even have many photos up. Well that's all changes and our profile is now 'rich' with information about us. Call it a 'coming out' party for the new year, if you will, but we've really become less concerned about hiding a lot of information about ourselves. Perhaps it's the maturation of being in the 'lifestyle' for a few years. Perhaps we are becoming less nervous about someone tracking us down. Don't worry. We are still being careful. We don't need those holiday family and friends finding out too much about us!

We've also been corresponding with some of you with whom we've previously not spoken. Now, before I freak you out, we can 'track' you. We simply get an email when someone views our website and then goes on to Kasidie and signs up for a membership. A few of you even signed up for an 'elite' membership which allowed me to qualify for a new iPad (thank you to all that did!). The cool thing about this is we've been adding some of you as new online friends there which has allowed us to get to know some of you a bit better. So, if you are one of those that has signed up for Kasidie, look for a message from us saying hello (and check out our improved personal profile!

K, have to run. We are due out at the restaurant/bar at 8 and I need to get my girl face on.....so excited! Oh....and look below. I thought I had added this photo a couple weeks back but see now that it was in our 'pending' posts. A New Year's photo that I previously failed to publish!

A New Year's Photo for our friends

2012-01-02T12:26:00.000-08:00

It's been quite some time since I posted any photos. Perhaps I've been feeling a bit overly consciencous about how I've been looking. It seems the holidays always have me feeling that way with all the fun food during this time of year, the busy schedule that doesn't allow me to work out as often as I'd like, and...well, the end of the year that has me thinking, I am another year older! Ha ha. Anyway, And told me I am still his hot wife and he wanted me to post it. I also wanted to say thank you to all of you that have 'hung in there' and stayed with us as we've not posted as often as, perhaps, we have in the past.

HAPPY 2012!!!!

A Bit of a Sad Hotwife Today

2011-12-13T11:29:00.000-08:00

Hello everyone!

I know it's been awhile since I've been adding to our blog. I've been busy with the girls, the holidays and all that life seems to bring. My wonderful husband has been carrying us for awhile now and I thought it was my turn - while I had a moment - to say hello and check in with our hotwife blog followers.

I was sad, however, when I saw that there really hasn't been much in the way of comments (or email) for that matter from anyone reading our blog posts. I would have thought that the story And posted about our weekend in Vegas (a very fun, yummy experience, for sure) would have inspired some feedback. But alas, such is life in blogland. No hearing from our long-time readers and, it seems, we aren't adding many 'followers' either. Perhaps we've run the life of blogs and there simply isn't the following we once had.

We've clearly come a long way since we began writing....oh my....it's been five years ago now. We went from a couple interested in exploring, to one that dipped their toes in the waters and then went on quite the hot streak for quiet some time. Perhaps our encounters have become more 'routine' for our readers or perhaps they've moved on to newer (and younger, ha ha) couples or blog writers.

In some ways, we too have evolved. While we still enjoy the hotwife life, I think we've evolved into additional experiences that have added to our fun. Still, I know And would agree, it's still our favorite form of play. As my wonderful husband often says, it just makes sense. Two men and a woman just seems to work from an encounter standpoint. While we've entertained a few couples, and - like last Friday night - a single woman, on occasion, we still prefer the form of play that happens when two cocks can make me the center of attention....the hot wife phenomenon that started us all out five years ago.....and I am not complaining one bit about that!

I know we are not posting a few times a week like we once were but we hope we'll get more interaction. And always says I should write the blog full time since I get more feedback than him. I tell him...that's just because there are more male readers. But, come on girls....help a hotwife out and tell me you are still out there!

Last Saturday - a Hotwife in Vegas

2011-11-25T16:08:00.000-08:00

I hope everyone had a wonderful turkey day. We were surrounded by family and friends and had a wonderful meal, watched some football and ate too much. We might be non-traditional in some respects but when it comes to the holidays, we remain, clearly, traditional.

I wanted to finish our Vegas adventure before too much time had passed. While Rach and the girls brave black Friday and I sit watching football, I thought it was a good time to finish what I started.

As I last left our encounter, I was headed off to find a restroom while Rach stayed at the lounge bar. I messaged the man I had exchanged correspondence on Adult Friendfinder and text and phone conversations during the day ass I prepared our evening. He was at a nearby lounge...another quieter location than where we were. I messaged Rach to meet me there knowing I'd not be back for a bit. I told him she should be coming and described what she was wearing. I received a quite text "I am on it'. I assumed she was arriving.

Now my gorgeous hotwife has always told me of a fantasy she has. She wants to dress up like a high-priced call girl and have someone approach her asking for a 'good time'. I told the gentleman this and he was intrigued by this scenario. So, we thought we'd, lightly, let this play out. He messaged me back to confirm her arrival. He had, smartly, left the only chair at the lounge bar vacant next to him and she was sitting right next to him...ordering a club soda. After walking around a bit, awaiting the plan to be sprung, I moved closer to a slot machine area, sat down and put in a twenty. I would play slowly while being a voyeur...observing his progress.

I sat watching as they exchanged conversation. I could tell from the body language that things were going well. After a bit of time, I saw Rach pick up her cell and message me asking me "where are you?". After a few more minutes, I responded saying "Stopped at a craps table. Be back shortly". She answered with a "Okay" followed by, about ten minutes later, another message saying "I just got propositioned". I waited again, while observing his hand on her arm, smiles, movements closer with my own reply. "Oh yeah? What kind of proposition?". She replied with a "Money 4 sex" text message. My heart raced a bit as I sent a text back. "Ha ha. Is he attractive? (which I new he was) How much?"

A bit of time went by...I had to stick another twenty in the machine and ordered a drink from the cocktail waitress while observing their conversation. It was clear she was interested. "three hundred for an hour". I replied "Ask for twice that much...at least!" She immediately replied telling me she told him she was married but in an open relationship? Her text included something to the effect that "He said he'd be willing to pay you directly and let you watch or join in". I kept the ruse up with a reply of "He's not wanting sex from me is he? Ha ha." Then I followed with a "Tell him if he's good, you'll only charge him five hundred".

It wasn't long after that that she asked me how long I was going to be. I sent a text saying "Can't talk. In the middle of a shoot. Go ahead and message me in a bit". She said, "I'd prefer you come". So, I waited until I could see that interest might wane a bit if I didn't show up soon with a "K, Be right there". I waited a bit as the conversation began to change. They were definitely sitting closer. Her chair was turned toward his, his knee between her legs. As I walked up, Rach smiled and introduced Adam to me. I shook his hand and immediately said "So, I hear you want to fuck my wife". He laughed and said, "Well, she's hot and...yes, I'd like to fuck your wife". I told him that's up to her. Rach replied with a "Well, we did agree five hundred would be appropriate". He laughed and said, "Yes, if I am any good". It was when Rach purred "oh, I am confident you are" that I knew the plan had sprung.

I think we've covered enough of the details of previous encounters that I will simply tell you that he was, indeed, good to Rach. He was staying at the hotel - which made the plan concrete once she had interest. We went upstairs together to his room. As opposed to other MFM encounters we'd had, I mostly was a voyeur and, on occasion, directed while sipping a cocktail from his bar (the least, I figured, he owed me for allowing him to fuck my wife). As we dressed to leave, we realized this is the first time we had been in a single man's room while in Vegas. We usually would host!. As he (actingly) handed me five crisp hundred dollar bills, I pushed them back telling him this one was on the house. Rach mockingly said "Hey" to which I replied, "Baby, you are priceless".

As we grabbed a cab back to our hotel, I looked at my sexy MILF...hair a bit ruffled, still glowing from the good fucking this young man had given her, and she smiled. She said, "You obviously set that up, didn't you?" I smiled as I said, "I don't know what you are talking about." She sank into my chest as she said, "Mmmm, thank you, baby."

Hotwife Fun, Errors and Success in Vegas

2011-11-22T17:23:00.000-08:00

Well, two days after returning from the land of fine dining, shows, clubs and gambling, we are recovering nicely. It always seems that there is just so much to do while we are in Vegas yet we still seem to get home and think...we should have...I guess that's why the oasis in the desert exists. You tend to get your fill, for a short period of time, and have a craving to return!

Thursday night was our night. We rested after our arrival, had a nice dinner and hung out and gambled a bit. It was too cool to lay by the pool so Rach had a massage during the day Friday. I spent the day gambling some more (darn craps table just kept calling for me) and spoke to a few couples off Kasidie.

We exchanged messages and phone calls with one couple that we met at a bar in Cosmopolitan (if you haven't gone, it's a wonderful hotel!). We hung out, shared some conversation and then headed to a club to dance and flirt. While we had fun, we didn't 'play' with the couple (although Rach got a bit of flirtatious 'finger play' by a couple of guys while dancing). Kas couples tend to be more lifestyle play. By that, we mean the kind of couples that you meet to flirt, dance, kiss on with the, perhaps, possibility of play. We chose not to on this night and simply enjoyed the club scene and danced to the early morning hours.

I will admit one error I made (for the sake of educating our followers). Honestly, I should have known better. During the day, Friday, I also made the mistake of checking out Craigslist. Now, if you've ever made any efforts to meet someone off one these free, completely anonymous sites, you'll understand what I am about to say. You get what you pay for here. We invited two other couples to meet at the bar (w/ the approval of the legitimate, Kasidie couple). Neither showed. It's was just so...flakey. We waited for them to show. One messaged us a half hour late with a 'sorry, can't make it' text. The other just flaked. No response to our texts, no response to our calls. So lame. I should know better by now but I thought "what the hell" and tried anyway. Never again. It's a waste of time, disappointing (the no-shows, I think, put both Rach and I in a 'mood' which probably affected our time with the one legitimate couple) and we've no time for such flakes.

Trying to put Friday night behind us (or put another way, learning - again- from my lesson, I continued to screen AFF responses for Saturday night and book some reservations for the night. I did so with Rach's knowledge while keeping my plans a bit...secret. After taking a nap, I shared my plans, sorta, with Rach for the night. I told her, on our agenda, I had planned a nice dinner at MGM, a show and perhaps a strip club. She liked the idea but asked if that was it. I told her...yes...I think so. So, as far as she knew, we didn't have any plans for play.

Rach showered, put her short black dress on (looking like a gorgeous and sexy hotwife) and was ready in a couple hours. After a wonderful dinner and the show (Zumanity), I told Rach I wanted to head over to the Venetian for a drink and some blackjack. We walked around a bit before finding the bar where my plan would come together. We ordered a drink while playing some video poker and watched some people dancing nearby. I excused myself to the restroom and told her to stay and look sexy. She gave me that mischievous grin as I walked away, sending out a text message that would reveal my mystery.

Have to run for now...but I'll get back as soon as I can to give you the detail of Saturday night's success. Oh...and I have photos :)

Heading to Vegas, Baby!

2011-11-16T10:20:00.000-08:00

Hello blog fans!

We've been keeping our nose to the grindstone quite a bit lately since our last post and we think we deserve a break before the holidays begin. So, this weekend, we are heading to Sin City to see if we can find some trouble. We hopped on AFF last night to see if we could find a nice, attractive man for a one-time meeting. Hoping the prospects we've found prove to be cock-ful!

Besides working a lot, we've both been staying pretty silent...we know. Hopefully, we'll have some carnal delights to entice you with when we return. It's been a bit since we've been....okay, not that long lol....and we are looking forward to a few days in - what we view as - the adult capital of America. So, if you are reading this and you'll be in town, or perhaps you are from the wonderful land of mini-Elvis, shoot us a message. Oh, and if you've any suggestions of what we should do while we are in Vegas, please leave comments. We know of a number of spots but are always open to suggestions!

Well, I am off to do some shopping. My little MILF certainly needs some new clothes (okay, perhaps lingerie) for our trip. This is always something I enjoy...going shopping for my sexy hot wife...anticipating meeting a nice fella with whom to watch her flirt and knowing that, perhaps, if he is lucky, he'll get to take what I bought for her with loving thought off!

Read about this hotwife journey from the beginning

2011-11-05T23:31:00.000-07:00

Many times we get readers asking us, how did you turn the hotwife fantasy into reality? What challenges have you found in the MFM encounters? Well, we tell them, it's pretty well chronicled over the past....oh five years!

Yep, if you are finding this for the very first time, we've 240 or so posting over the previous few years - some periods more active than others. We always suggest, if you can, to start at the beginning. Frankly, we wish Blogger had a way to change the viewer settings so they could reverse the order. We think that if you find us, read the prior months' entries, you won't really come to appreciate where we've been and the stories we might tell (or education pieces we might share) started. So, go over to the right, look at the history and read from the beginning...if you've an interest in self-answering the question, how did your hotwife story ever start.

We also want to say, if you've written us and not received a reply, don't give up! We love hearing from our readers. Trust me, we get a lot of email and we try to answer as much of it as we can. So, while we sometimes can't seem to answer everyone, or answer every question, we do try as much as we possibly can. Please tell us what you think, check out our links and give us your honest feedback. Even if it's not positive, we love hearing how we might make this blog more educational and more entertaining!

Sexy Hotwife Halloween Parties

2011-10-27T09:10:00.000-07:00

Last weekend, we attended a 'lifestyle' Halloween party. It seems this time of year brings out the naughty, devilish side in a lot of people. Eroticism is rampant in the history of movies related to Halloween and we find the connection both fun and disappointing. Why does it seem that the public wants to make sex evil a tad....evil?

We had fun dressing up as the naughty nurse and an GYN doctor (free pelvic exams LOL) but found the evenings events didn't lead to anything erotic outside our own fun filled night role-playing after the party. It's a bit difficult meeting anyone at these events - everyone is dressed in ghoulish costumes and make-up and it was a bit of a mob scene. Add to that the cost of going to events like this ($125 to get in the door and then pay expensive prices for drinks - even nonalcoholic ones!) and a bit of the 'amateur hour' feel of the people. It is definitely limited to a once-in-a-very-great-while type event we'll attend.

We did pick up a single girl and take her to the event (she'd not been to anything like this before). We had some fun flirting with this sexy little sailor girl before she found another couple that she had known previously and spent most of her evening with them. We simply watched some of the entertainers, walked around looking at everyone's costumes and danced the night away together. While Rach received plenty of comments on her naughty nurse outfit (and one couple asked if they could touch her perfect breasts) no single guys really caught Rach's eye.

Thinking about the night, while we had fun, we definitely prefer meeting single men - and, more recently, adding other couples and single females into our mix - in a more intimate setting. That's what's great in the times we live. Meeting people through adult personal websites is both initially anonymous and allowing of a get-to-know period. We find that works best for keeping our play lives separate from our daily responsibilities.

While some are okay with mindless sex (and we don't make any judgments...for some is what they desire, no strings), we prefer to get to know the people we might entertain a bit more than the quick introduction and jump in the sack. While we aren't always out to make life-long friends or lasting relationships, we find the encounters we have are much more enjoyable if we get to know a bit about the people first. Of course, there are exceptions to that rule...when the timing is right and the chemistry is felt. But, for consistency and our way of life, meeting people online seems to work best.

With that disclaimer, we are heading to another party dressed in costume again this weekend. It is a private party of a couple we've known for some time. We've shared with them our primary interest in entertaining single men and they tend to agree that a threesome is a lot easier to accommodate than a foursome. They've invited a few couples and a few sexy, single guys (and one single girl) over to their home. We aren't certain that this event will lead to anything more than the more public venue, but it certainly seems the odds are greater we may end up in some erotic, costume-free fun at this party than the last!

Some down time

2011-10-13T06:53:00.000-07:00

So after our Vegas trip, we took a step back for a few weeks. We've been focusing on each other the past month (I can't believe it's been a month since we last posted!). There are times in our relationship...the ebb and flow, I suppose...when we just are really into each other. I mean, we are always into each other but there are times when we simply are madly in love and it is exhibited with a daily...dare I say hourly...dose. Besides spending a lot of quality time together, we've both been extremely busy with our daily lives.

Oh...wait...I've not mentioned our fun night doing a bit of Dom/Sub training. We found a single woman that wanted to explore and invited her over for a bit of fun. It seems she's since found a boyfriend (that is 'vanilla') so we've not continued to train. But, we are pretty confident, based on her intrigue with the whole evening (she ended up sleeping over in the same bed with us) that she'll be back. I'll try to write more about that later. It's an entire subject we are exploring and learning more about. Not really the topic of this blog, however, so we'll sprinkle some of what we are experiencing there with our normal content as we get back on track.

We did book another trip back to Vegas this past weekend for mid-November. We've some friends that asked us if we'd like to use their time share for a week. It's hard to get away that long (plus we tend to miss the girls too much when we leave alone that long) so, we are planning a long weekend. I think this time we'll try to do a 'mansion party'. They post events on Kasidie and we hope one will get posted for the time we are out there. If not, we'll probably find our own fun thru the site or AFF. It's never let us down yet ;)

Vegas Recovery

2011-09-12T17:39:00.000-07:00

What a wonderfully hot time we had in Las Vegas! Still in recovery mode today after a fun 48 hours in Sin City. We didn't make any money (actually, I think the casinos should be very happy we came!) but we had a blast over the weekend.

Friday night we played with a single guy we had previously met on AFF. He is a good-looking, local guy (interestingly, we've typically had greater success meeting men that are out-of-town versus local guys), very respectful and someone I am sure we'll meet again in the future. Rach really enjoyed playing with him and we even had a brief DP experience (something Rach will, admittedly, tell you she 'has to be in the mood for"). We met him in the early evening which left us plenty of time to sprout our wings on the town and dance until the early hours. Rach was in quite the mood after our early adventure and flirted with and lightly played with a number of men, women and couples while we were out. I guess there is something about being in Vegas, having sex with a hot stud and then hitting the town dressed to the nines (in her platform heels) to get a girl in the mood.

Saturday, we relaxed by the pool for a bit...until it started to rain. We thought we were in the desert! That sorta killed the afternoon so we walked the strip, had some lunch, took a nap and got our game on for Saturday night. After what seemed like forever, we were ready to hit the town VIP-style to one of the many strip clubs. Rach looked so gorgeous in her tight white dress...sans panties or anything else underneath! We met some really great people we had exchanged messages with on Kasidie. Just fun, interesting people having a great time Saturday night. We even met a mini-Elvis! LOL

We decided not to pick up anyone Saturday night (although there was one hot stripper I was HOPING Rach would invite back for some fun LOL). Instead, we stayed out gambling until late and fucked until the early dawn...recalling the night of fun she had with her hot stud with the girthy cock the night before. He really rocked her world. At breakfast Sunday,my hotwife even commented that she was still really sore from Friday night! She said, "Baby, his cock was sooo good!" That put a smile to both our faces!

So, forgive us if we don't post for a few days. We may need a couple (and we mean days) to recover from our fun weekend! I know Rach will for sure!

Real Amateur Hotwife Movies

2011-09-08T18:31:00.000-07:00

While we were taking a break, Rach and I talked about something that we've discussed here in the past...with a little difference. We have always wondered why there is no subculture, in the movie industry, that explores the idea of the hot wife. There are movies that 'touch' on the subject. There are movies that explore a threesome (and typically place such in a negative light) and there are books and plenty of paying websites dedicated to it. But no real hotwife movie.

In our continual, it seems, quest for finding such, we came acroos many websites that seem to offer free video clips or photo galleries. Only when you click on the link do you find that such is not the case. It's frustrating (and sometimes really frustrating when you hit one of those sites you can't seem to get out of without multiple windows opening!) and had us thinking.

When we started this site, we were decidedly against anything too commercialized. Sure, we put a couple links to good sites like Adultfriendfinder and Kasidie and a couple others to which we've linked...not to make money but to lead honest people looking for quality that we, also, personally use. I will disclose, for ethical purposes that, if someone joins, we get a discount on our membership fees and toys and, in the case of Kasidie, Rach is a paid membership shy of getting her iPad (it has to be before the end of the year for her to earn it LOL). This has always been and will always be, not about money for us (trust me, we do fine there) but in getting information, educating couples (and singles) about the hotwife phenomena and exploring our own personal fantasy fulfillment journey. We know, from the comments we receive, many of you appreciate that fact.

So, here is what we are thinking of doing...to expand our education and understanding...and to fulfill a needed niche in hotwife fantasy fulfillment. We've always appreciated (and confidentially shared some) stories and journeys of our readers. But we'd like to add an element to our blog. We'd like to include couples that are comfortable sending us their videos and photos. You can delete any faces (trust us, we certainly understand and respect discretion!). You can send us photos. You can send us an interview discussion of you (and, preferably your mate) discussing the issue.

We know a lot of couples have a 'one-off' fantasy. We know many are just exploring now and haven't 'taken the plunge'. We know many have experiences but simply don't have the time or desire to blog about their every adventure. Perhaps you've made a home video of an experience. Perhaps you'd like to challenge yourself and your relationship by anonymously confessing or 'coming out' to a like-minded readership. Perhaps you, too, have a blog and would like to share your videos (we'd be happy to promote like-minded, non-commercialized blogs) here as well. We want you to help us expand our knowledge and our readers' knowledge on the issue. We don't want to commercialize what you share. We don't want to impede on your desire for anonymity. We simply want to share, with our readers, some of what others are thinking and doing. Who knows, we might even share a video or two ourselves!

So, if you'd like to send us a video, photos (we can edit if yo'd prefer), stories or discussion, send us an email. It's in our profile but we'll publish here for those that want it...it's Rachandrew@hotmail.com. We always look forward to hearing from you!

Back After a Little Time Off

2011-09-07T16:33:00.000-07:00

So, after taking some tome off for family affairs and summer activities, we decided, post Labor Day, it was time to get back to our blog posts.

I actually told Rach some time back that I would post the next post since, it seems, she's been carrying the load and has written much more than I. I told her I was quite sure more of our readers wanted to hear from here anyway...ha ha. But, to my word (better late than never) I am writing to get us back to writing to our dedicated readers. We hope you've not forgotten us!

Despite our time away, we have found time for play over the past six or seven weeks. We actually went to a lifestyle club a couple times, played with a single female (in the hot tub at the club) and played with a couple we met on Kasidie. Rach has also been a good hotwife...finding a new single guy (while shopping, of all places) and having a couple fuck dates with one of her, more regular, AFF guys.

We've also explored a bit of our fantasies that, to this point, were a bit unknown. We've dabbled with a bit of dom/sub play. It's been enlightening and fun and perhaps we'll talk a bit more about that and see if we can get some of you to open up and tell us a bit about your fantasies...in that area or others you've yet to explore.

Outside that, we are heading to Vegas this weekend! It's a short trip, Friday to Sunday, that we just decided on a couple days ago. Thank god it's not a long journey! We are staying a hotel that, while not lifestyle, does cater to that crowd so we are hoping for some play there. So, if you are couple heading to Vegas this weekend...let us know! ;)

I've also been looking over some AFF profiles for single men as I have a particular fantasy in mind that I'd love to share but Rach might read this and then I've no surprise. That's a part of the fantasy and I don't want to give it away. It's something I've stored in my memory banks that she's previously mentioned (sorry, Dear...no more hints). Something I always try to do...store a fantasy or two in my mind to recall when the opportunity might present itself. I highly recommend it to keep your couple sex life interesting!

We'll see if perhaps we can write - whether while in Vegas or when we return. If you have stayed with us, be sure to say hello. We always love hearing from you!

We've Been Quiet....not By Design

2011-07-11T15:14:00.000-07:00

Hey everyone. I know our posts have become less frequent recently and I just wanted to give you some update so you didn't think we were gone.

Rach's family has some health issues going on and we've been dealing with the sudden loss of a family member. It's part of life and, despite our best efforts to keep the downside of life, it's better we let you all know a little bit of information lest we think we've forgotten.

We appreciate your thoughts and, once things have settled down, we will be back. I can assure you that. We also want to mention, we appreciate those couples and individuals that have signed on to Kasidie recently and signed up for a membership. It was actually the first time I'd seen Rach smile in awhile when, a few days ago, she learned that, because of our blog and the people that had signed up, she's just a few members away from winning an iPad! Certainly not speaking from a commercial standpoint....I mention this only because it was something that was a bit of a uplifting moment - and shows me the value - of our friends and our continued blogging on our life adventures.

I've also noticed that more of the posts have come from Rach than me (for quite some time) and I need to take a more active role in our blog. I will certainly make every effort to do so since it may be a few weeks before Rach feels up to it. So, I'll begin adding my two cents to this effort.

Happy Father's Day to All Sexy Dads

2011-06-19T11:34:00.000-07:00

Wow, we've not been on in over a month and I can tell from the email we've received....you've missed us! :)

We've been busy having some fun that we'll have to update you on...but not today. I will share, briefly, that we've shared some fun with a few couples, a single female and I've had some fun with a couple fun gentlemen. I feel bad as we've been pretty active (so there have been some updates and fun to report) but it seems we've been extremely busy with, not only fun, but also life. Activities in the summer, always a more busy time, some major life events to family and activities with the girls have been keeping us going every day.

We do want to take a moment to wish all those sexy dads out there a Happy Father's Day. There is nothing more sexy, to me, than a man who cherishes the relationship with his children. Mixing a hot, sometimes naughty man with responsible, loving, caring dad is the ultimate in sexiness. Fortunately, I have mine (who received breakfast in bed followed by the gift all fathers should receive - a shower blowjob!). Happy Father's Day to my man, my partner, the father of our daughters...and to all those sexy dads that share these same qualities.

Playing Separately...Sorta!

2011-05-16T13:26:00.000-07:00

If you've followed our blog all along....or started at the beginning (I think you'll better appreciate our journey if you start at the beginning), you know we've come a long way in the four years we've been involved in our hotwife adventures. Some we've not tried and probably never will (And would say 'sounding' fits that category LOL). We've tried some new things on...some of which we've decided don't fit us. Some things we've tried and, perhaps, will repeat again some day while others are an 'occasional' thing. Then there's that category where we are still deciding or have decided is a part of our ongoing play.

Friday night probably fits into the 'occasional' thing. I don't say that lightly since it was really my first time trying it. But I ventured into a new area that was exciting and, I believe, we want to explore more. I met a couple... alone.

It wasn't planned that way. And had just returned from a business trip and was scrambling to get home, get changed and get ready. We had a date to meet a new couple. One we've exchanged messages with on AFF for quite some time. Like us, they enjoy the occasional male companion and....sometimes a few male companions at the same time. I was really excited to meet them but we had one problem. And called me as he drove home and I explained. Our normal sitter for the girls had called and explained she had to cancel. The g-parents were not available either. I called a couple 'back-ups' to no avail. That's when And told me 'why don't you just go meet them.' "Alone?", I asked scared to death. "Yes. I am tired, anyway. I've not seen the girls all week. I'll stay and you go meet them.'

This is a couple we had previously made plans with twice before. Once we had to cancel and once they had to cancel. If we canceled again, I thought, we may get the label of 'difficult' in their book and we might not ever meet them. I really didn't want that to happen. I was really looking forward to meeting this provocative woman and her man ;) I sent them a text to explain and they were, of course, totally okay with meeting me alone. I was the unsure one!

But, I put on a tight black dress, slipped on my heels, fixed my make-up and prepared to go. As And pulled into the drive, grabbed his bags, I was already out the door. I had already sent them another message telling them I was at least 15 minutes late already waiting for And to arrive. As I walked out, And gave me one of those, 'damn, I need to fuck you now' looks and told me I looked great. I kissed him tightly and off I went....alone.

As I drove to the parking garage, my heart raced. I was more nervous meeting this couple than almost any single guy I had met! I had trouble finding a parking spot then had a bit of a 'mace-ready' incident when a guy (drunk, I am sure) started following me asking 'hey baby, where you going?'. Fortunately, it was a brightly lit area and the restaurant we were meeting was very close so I quickly lost him. As I approached, I saw a most scrumptious looking woman dressed in a sexy pair of skinny jean and tight blouse an decent looking guy dressed similarly nice/casual sitting in a booth and knew I had found them.

From the moment we met, Peter and Lynnette made me feel completely comfortable. Even more exciting, Lynnette had me wet from the first glance. She was absolutely stunning. I hadn't been this attracted to a woman in quite some time! She had the warmest eyes of any woman I've ever seen. We spoke about our lives, our adventures. Lynnette told me that she and Peter had met on Adultfriendfinder a few years ago. As I mentioned, we shared a similar interest in the art of an MFM encounter and that was how they had originally met. Lynette, single at the time, had wanted to find an encounter involving her and two men. She only found one but it ended up being the man that would give her many men over the next years. Lynnette explained that they had recently expanded to inviting a few guys over at the same time and making a complete party of it....with her at the center of every man's attention. I nearly had an orgasm simply listening to her tell the details of one of these encounters. She has a propensity for younger men - an interest I don't share - but the description she portrayed taking on three men was simply

I messaged And while I was there while trying not to be too rude to my host and hostess. He was thrilled that I was having such a good evening and wanted to know if I had changed my mind about the evening since meeting them. (We had only planned for an introductory drink.) I assured him that I wanted him to be a part of it and, if he was here, I might have changed my mind but, no, I wanted to wait. We made some plans for a couple weeks out via text with And while we ordered and drank a second cocktail.

It was near our goodbyes that I decided I needed to use the ladies' room. Lynnette said she needed to go as well and we walked side-by-side getting the MILF attention of a few tables with men. We chatted the whole way about ever having a relationship with a woman. She asks how long I have known I've been bisexual and we both discover that some of our earliest fantasies were about women...neither acting on it for years. It is then that this classic beauty tells me she has always wanted a girlfriend. We tell each other how amazing we look and I ask her for a hug, then...we both lean in for a kiss....soft, a bit reserved, but I know we both felt the heat. I hear her moan into my mouth and I am undone. I was so wet, I wanted her right then and there. I pulled her into my as she ran her hand down my side and pulled my ass into her. I spread my legs slightly so she could grind into me. Leaning back, I ran my hand down her chest....and we separated...deciding we needed to stop or we wouldn't stop. Our better judgment caught the best of us, though, as we worried someone might walk in on us (okay, I didn't care THAT much).

On my drive home, I called And and recalled the night's events to him. I just know And is going to love them. I can't wait to taste Lynnette's mouth again...something so different about the taste of another woman's lips. I do think there is something about the attraction to her knowing we share the same interest in MFM and have found men that, not only allow it, enjoy it! Perhaps we should turn the tables on our two hunks and give them, individually an FMF! Wow....okay, I am now wet again just recalling it! I better go take care of this before it's time to pick up the girls!

Sounding, Heard of It?

2011-05-03T10:40:00.000-07:00

So today I was on our AFF profile looking over the myriad of emails we get. I am beginning to think that most single men can't read! Guys, for tips on writing a response, see our prior posting...please!

Anyway, I came across one email that was quite interesting and talked about something I'd never heard about before. It's called 'Sounding'. Perhaps some of our readers have heard of it. Here's the message I received:

Have you ever played with a "sound"? A sound is a long thin rod that is made for inserting into a guy's (or girl's) urethra. I have different sizes so I can find one that fits. I like them because it feels good in there I can even rub my prostate from my urethra lol. I also enjoy putting other toys in there too. If you've never done this before, I can teach you how - you can practice on me

I had to call And, who was in a meeting and called me back, to ask him if he'd ever heard of it. He said he had heard of it but didn't know much about it. When I asked if it sounded interesting, he said, "It sounds painful!" So, guys, has anyone ever had experience with this? I am more curious than interested but I am always open to learning about (and as And would say educating others) about something we've not experienced.

Semper Paratus

2011-04-23T19:03:00.000-07:00

We are headed out to meet a new guy here in a bit that I've been talking to for the past couple weeks. He's a former Coast Guard and has some very nice arms. I think it's probably a fairly common fantasy to have a man in uniform. I don't normally have that military/fireman/police officer fantasy but there is something incredibly sexy about this guy.

We've been talking to him for the past couple weeks and, last night, did an online video chat session (Skype has become our new friend) that eventually led to me and And putting on a show for him while he stroked his long cock and talked/told me what to do on the phone. And really got into putting on a show for this guy and, at the end, we made plans to meet up with him tonight. The most amazing thing is that he stroked his cock for us for over an hour and didn't cum...so I am hoping he saved that up for tonight!

It's been awhile since we've had an MFM. I think we went away from this for some time but we recently renewed our AFF membership (it had went 'standard' for about a month and we hadn't renewed it...it sucks being standard LOL) and instantly found this incredible hunk of a man. I am looking forward to meeting him and, if everything goes right, he's agreed to paying for a hotel room.

K, better go. We can't make it too late a night. We've Easter eggs to put out for the girls. Guess we'll be doing that in the dark and, I hope, I'll be sore walking around finding hiding spots for them!

Way Overdue for a Post...with Photos!

2011-04-01T10:19:00.000-07:00

We had spring break for the girls thrown in the past two weeks and And is traveling for work again. So, we've been pretty quiet. But, this morning, after my morning conversation with And, I was inspired to spend some quality time...alone. I actually did all this myself and that's no April Fool! LOL I set up the camera on a tripod, put the camera on a delayed series and had some fun. I even figured out how to transfer them to the computer and 'edit' them to make them look a little bit like an old movie :)

So, if one thing that has come out of this blog, I've learned to be a photographer! Speaking of movies (well, I was anyway haha) anyone know of any good ones on the subject of our blog or something of similar substance out or in production? We heard there was one that was going to come out that would explore the hotwife subject last year but we've not heard of anything.

Have We Moved Away from Our Hotwife Adventures?

2011-03-15T19:15:00.000-07:00

We took some time away to look at what we've written thus far in 2011. It seems, and this goes back to a bit into 2010, our blog has taken on a bit of a different theme. We've seemed to be talking a lot about the 'educational' side of the hotwife lifestyle. From 'how to decide if the lifestyle is right for you', to 'finding a potential guy for your adventures', to advice on online profiles, it seems we've been focusing a bit heavily on that subject. I think we've both been cognizant of the reason why we established this hotwife blog so long ago. There were a lot of blogs out there describing physical 'encounters'. But when we were looking into whether this was a journey we wanted to embark on, we didn't find a lot of the psychological and emotional aspects fully described. So, we've always been aware of what we wanted to tell in our story....not only the physical encounters but the 'what this is', the 'how do you get started' and the 'why do I feel this is something I want to do' questions you, as a reader, might have.

We've also been talking about our adventures as a couple with other couples more. This is something of an evolution...as this whole journey has been. As we embarked, we didn't really anticipate this. But, it's something we've started to explore more. I think it evolved that, as we met men, we discovered that we'd also like to include a female from time-to-time LOL. We've not really discovered a desire for a FMF threesome (not that we'd turn one down if the right opportunity existed and we were both comfortable). But, with Rach's bi-sexuality being brought more 'forward', I think we've discovered that we like the idea of including a man and a woman from time to time.

That's not to say that we would not consider ourselves hotwife adventurers first and foremost. It's still our favorite form of play. There's something unique to it. While the very few couples experiences have been fun, I know we both enjoy the voyeuristic aspect of the MFM encounter. Rach loves the attention of two men, four hands, two mouths, two cocks. I love the experience of seeing her fully satiated. There is nothing so mind-boggling as seeing the woman you love, the woman you think of as the sexiest woman in the world, receiving pleasure from, and giving pleasure to, another man. It's so erotic to see her being a cock craving wanton, gorgeous, slut. I tell her as much as she smiles at me knowingly.

As so very exciting as the preparation for, and the actual, encounter is, there is nothing better, more fulfilling than the 'after-party'. It's after the other guy leaves. We are alone, reflecting. I can still smell his scent on her. I am so thrilled to have watched her. She is so very fulfilled, yet so very understanding and desirous of what happens after. That's when we get together, re-living the event, talking about it in privacy and sharing each other fully. There is a sense of "taking her back" as mine. Rach has expressed to me how much she enjoys the confirmation as we come together sexually.

I know we've expressed, in this blog, how very appreciative we are to the many emails and comments we get on the blog. Everyone (well there is the rare, WTH-type response) is so very positive about what we are doing with documenting our journey. Make no mistake, we have also written this for ourselves. It's fun for us to reflect on posts we've written much earlier and, in some cases, reflect upon it differently...a bit of wisdom or knowledge, if you will. We also talk about when we are old and gray and how fun it will be to look back on our lives. While we are fairly conservative in our lives...we don't smoke, go skydiving, no drug use, not much into drinking, we want to say we've lived. A friend of ours recently reminded us with a bit of the mantra we've journey into this....
“Life is not a journey to the grave with intentions of arriving safely in a pretty well-preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out and loudly proclaiming ... WOW! What a ride!”

Thoughts on the Hotwife Poll We Posted

2011-03-10T12:41:00.000-08:00

I was just playing a bit online (checking our AFF and Kasidie messages and chatting on Yahoo Messenger) and thought I'd reflect on our blog a bit. I don't really have anything to write but I was reviewing the poll results from the one we posted some time back "Where Are You at in your Hotwife Experience?".

I was most interested to see a larger number of couples or, at the very least one of the parties to a couple, and that the highest number of voters appeared in the "My partner and I have talked about the (hotwife) fantasy" category. Even more encouraging (at least, to us) was that the next two categories with the highest results were "We've had some 'light' (hotwife) experience" and the "We have (hotwife) experience and are actively looking" category. This tells me we have more couples, or SOs (Significant Others) in a relationship, reading our blog that we originally thought! We thought it was mostly men (which, I think is probably still the case) but thought there was a higher percentage of single men looking for a couple. Now, perhaps there still are as this poll certainly has no scientific barometer but it's encouraging that so many couples took the time to vote and that we've so many readers that match our "target" audience.

I did find one other thing interesting. We added an "other" category for anything we felt didn't quite fit. However, now, we are curious what interest these "other" readers have. Perhaps we'll hear from one or two and they can tell us. Or, perhaps you as a reader fitting one of the other 'categories' can enlighten us on what you think these readers "other" interest is. So, please....enlighten us!

As I said, I don't have any real adventures to write about....I know, I am a bit boring these days LOL.... In fact, And has been wondering if we are taking a break or if I've lost interest. I tell him, 'just taking a break'. To be honest, there hasn't been many good prospects lately. Maybe it's the economy or something but it seems like the men we've been hearing from recently really don't 'match' our idea of what the hotwife encounter is about. Or maybe, I've just become too picky.

I do know I go through periods where I simply want my man and don't want to play. Then, all of a sudden, I'll become extremely horny and I'll want a man, or men, now! I am sure we'll find someone soon (are you out there on AFF-land my sexy hunk play toy?) but until then, I am enjoying the reflection and the period where And and I re-live moments, experiences and some of the funny things that have happened. That's the wonderful thing about having these experiences. While the evening may end, the memories and the re-living the experience with my main guy live on and on. It keeps the sex quite new when you can throw in a 'remember when...' :)

Going to a Lifestyle Club and Playing....or Not!

2011-03-07T17:22:00.000-08:00

A couple weeks back, we decided to go to a club and meet a couple and a single guy. Both the couple and the single guy were attractive, interesting, intelligent and we had a wonderful time meeting them. We enjoyed their company and had a very enjoyable evening. However, we just weren't "in the mood" to play with others. We didn't go there - and we usually don't - go there with any "plan". Either way, we sorta "go with the flow", communicate with each other throughout the evening and make sure we are both on the same page.

On this night, we prepared for a night of adult fun. We cleaned up, dressed up, had a cocktail before going and it was like any other of the few times we've visited. However, tonight, we just decided not to invite anyone else into our play. The couple and the single guy ended up having some fun in one of the private play rooms. They seemed to hit it off quite well. They were all very attractive people. We joined them but...didn't 'join' them.

Instead, we played a bit to our voyeuristic side - watching them. They had a wonderfully erotic threesome. While we watched, we - obviously - became turned on. We played a bit with each other - first Rach sucking my cock and then me going down on her - and simply enjoyed the time together in a comfortable, adult environment. We glanced over from time to time as the two men did a wonderful job of fully satisfying the other female. She, too, did a valiant effort in double sucking them. We left the door open so others could stop by and watch. We saw a few couples look in and touch each other...like they wished they could join us. It was quite hot to be a part of the group...but not part of the group...LOL

While this post may come as a bit of disappointment to some that read our posts (especially since we 'teased' this a few weeks back), we wanted to write about this night instead of saying "we didn't play" or simply staying silent on the subject...and we did it for a reason. We wanted to share with you that not every time is going to be a 'play time'. There are times when we are in a more mellow mood, want to enjoy and take in the surroundings, watch each other, enjoy each other's company. Some times it's good to just watch.

If you've never been to a club that caters to couples or people in the 'lifestyle', you shouldn't be afraid to go. First, there is no sign on your back saying 'newbie' or anything that would make you stick out. There's also ZERO pressure. You can have a drink, relax and people watch, dance or converse with others without someone looking at you as 'fresh meat' or pressuring you to do anything. Of course, it would be normal to have nerves. But, the first time we went, we can honestly say they were unfounded. The club(s) we've visited have no visible, significant difference from any other club. The difference, I think, is that you are with people that share an interest in being sexually open. Now this isn't to say that there is visible nudity. Most are simply dressed fashionable sexy.

There is a spirit of fun in the air. There are attractive (and yes, some not-so-attractive) couples hanging out, getting to know each other. There are couples hanging out by themselves, talking to each other. At some, there are single guys hanging out with couples or just having a quiet drink by themselves. If you care to chat with someone, it's as easy as asking if a seat is taken, naturally introducing yourselves and taking it from there. But, if you prefer to just watch, that's okay too. If you are afraid that someone that you didn't want to attract might make advances, it's as easy as being cordial, politely excusing yourselves - perhaps making an excuse to get another drink or checking out the dance floor - and moving to another spot.

Our experience has typically been to make soft plans to meet someone there. Whether it be a single guy (that we may even host to gain access to the club) or another couple, we try to make introductions online first. It's really no different than meeting someone at a 'vanilla' bar. You chat, see if you'd might like to meet and make plans to simply meet at the adult club. Just because you meet at an adult club certainly doesn't preclude expectations that you play; and, it can be a good 'ice breaker' for feeling comfortable with going to a club. For some, it feels less like you are sticking out if you are sitting conversing with another rather than sitting alone.

Granted, all clubs are different. Some allow single guys on specific nights, others only allow single guys if they are with a couple. Some are 'on premises' meaning they have rooms that you can rent or use to meet someone in private. Most are 'off premises' meaning they are a place to simply meet others that have similar interests and any 'play' is done elsewhere.

It pays to do a bit of investigation so you have some understanding of what the club might attract. One way is to do some investigation. That's one of the features we found on the adult personals site, Kasidie. They have listings of clubs in all areas. Chances are good that, if you are in or visiting a metro area, there are multiple clubs or 'takeover' events of a vanilla bar that cater to adults interested in learning more. If you are looking for events or clubs in your area that you may want to check out, shoot us a line and we'll share some links with you.

Reading Men's Online Profiles - What they Say

2011-03-02T12:47:00.000-08:00

We previously spoke about how to set up a profile that will hopefully get the attention that you are looking for. Now let’s talk about reading other people’s profiles. Again, remember that this is our opinion based on years of experience and our opinion only. You may find additional items or areas that might be a 'flag' or catch your eye. Some of this might also help if you are a single guy trying to create a profile and be a 'third'.

First, sit down and talk to your partner about all this. Are you reading profiles together? Are you both there when you make initial contact? Who are you looking for? What is your level of initial contact? What are your expectations before that initial meeting?

As we discussed in our previous post, names can say a lot about who you are and what you are looking for. But also remember, some people just decide to hop on and they may not think through their name choice but they are stuck so have a sense of humor when looking at names.

We have previously talked about how we feel about graphic pictures. I prefer not to see too much of the 'package' in their initial profile picture but to each their own. I think it says something about a guy if the first view he decides to give is one of him and his 'schlong'. One thing that we do look for – have they been on since 2004 and yet they have NO pictures whatsoever? Why is that? Do they have previous testimonials? Someone that has actually met them and can 'testify' that they are real and who they say they are in the profile?

Now, this will sound a bit hypocritical but...we do not keep face pictures on any sites. I know that they are supposed to be safe and private but… who knows and we are both in visible positions and cannot take the risk. But, if someone wants to meet us, we require face pictures. We both want to see what the guy looks like....face and body (and not just the 'package'). Once we are comfortable that we don't know them from the PTO, subdivision, work, etc, we will share some of our "private" album profile photos that include our face. But, if the guy has any chance at all, he is going to need to reveal his face....first.

If there are graphic photos or, in particular, photos of the guy with another woman or in the company of another couple, one thing we do want to see is the use of condoms. If we see photos of the guy 'barebacking' it, we tend to shy away. We've found that either a) the guy is using photos of him and an S.O. that he is hiding or has no knowledge of his endeavors or b) while saying he is playing safe, obviously isn't. We know there are photos of some men that are part of a couple where she is aware and okay with him playing, but....seriously....keep those to yourself. If you are going to put up photos of you 'in action', why not show that you are willing to play safely.

The section that the guy writes tells us a lot about who we might be meeting. We look for people who can put more than two words together in a sentence, who can spell and use some punctuation. This might sound snobby but I have met enough guys to know that guys who can’t write a decent profile are probably not guys who we will like nor who will like us. I know that might sound conceited to some but...it's our rule. Spell check, check for proper use of a word (like the word too - as in also- being written as 'to').

Most sites, including AFF, have sections where someone can describe their interests, take tests, etc. We think these can be insightful (and says something if someone has taken the 'extra step' to complete them. Make sure to read through these and if either of you see a red flag, ask questions and check it out further.

Reading profiles together can be a lot of fun. Admittedly, many of the profiles we see we actually end up laughing about or making fun of them. It can also be enlightening into what the other is thinking. You might find that someone that you wouldn't think she has any interest in, she actually does. Explore this and learn more about her! As important as what is written on the page and the images presented, you often need to read between the lines and figure out the whole picture. Of course, there is no guarantees that the guy or guys you pick out will be exactly what you thought (they rarely are EVERYTHING you thought they were) but by screening carefully, you can save yourself some time and frustration and do everything possible to ensure you have a positive experience.

How to Write an Online Hotwife Profile

2011-02-24T18:47:00.000-08:00

One of the first steps many couples take in exploring the hotwife lifestyle will typically include signing up on an online website that caters to adults. That will require you to create a profile about yourself. We've never really discussed HOW you might go about writing a profile and thought we should explore it for those that find that task a bit....daunting!

Of course, the first thing to decide is what site(s) you are going to place a profile. Perhaps it's more than one. Lord knows there are a multitude of them out there. We like a couple.  One, we've been on for years... Adult Friend Finder (AFF) and the other, Kasidie, we've recently discovered and really like for it's ease of use and trial without commitment. There are some other great sites but they are geared more toward swinging and couples. Sites like SwingLifestyle (SLS), Swingers Date Club (SDC), Swingers Watching, and Adult Playground (APG) are good if you are a couple looking for a couple.  They may also be great places to go and meet people, ask questions, get tips, find out about local groups and clubs, etc. but from a shear number standpoint, as we've said, AFF is to the online adult social network as eBay is to auctions. Regardless of the site you choose, we think the success is a direct reflection of how much you put into it.

A couple of the first questions you'll come up against are....what email address do we use to sign up and what name do you call yourselves. We do recommend you get a gmail, yahoo or other free account specifically for this purpose. Believe it or not, what screenname you call yourselves might be the hardest part about writing your profile. Most are dramatically different from your actual name in real life. You most likely will be looking for discretion so try not to use nicknames that will connect someone with you. Just try to find something that is catchy, original, not too long or hard to remember AND says something about you.
Pictures on the profile is an area where people will probably disagree most. We don't have a graphic /x-rated photos on my public profile. I know many couples (and the majority of men) llike them and I know that a lot of men like seeing them. But… I think that you are likely to get better “hits” with a photo that is not overly graphic in nature for your public profile.  Save the more graphic ones for people you correspond or become 'friends' with first. Now, that's not to say you have to have prudish, boring or nondescript pictures. Put a tease out there. Something that shows the reader a bit about your body without showing them, right away, the more graphic. Also, try to make it something current...within the past six months or less. You certainly shouldn't lie about your appearance and put a picture up from younger/thinner days. Find something that is at least relatively recent and accurate.

Be honest with who you are. If you are 50 say you are 50. If you weight 200+ lbs you probably should not say that you are average unless your height carries that weight well. I say this because if you lie… sooner or later you will, hopefully, meet the people and you don’t want them to look shocked when they meet you (this also refers back to that current picture recommendation above). If you are 50 but everyone says that you look 40 then make a note to say that in the text of your profile but don’t say that you are 40. I once heard a guy say, so you really are the age in your profile? We said, yep. We are honest. He said, after complimenting us on our age (saying, of course, we looked younger) "you know, the average +- is 3 years?" We weren't familiar.   But, we have run accross that and, honestly, it's a turnoff to find out the person lied JUST to meet you. We aren't hung up on age (or cock size). We are hung up on honesty.

Okay, so now you can go into a bit of  what you are seeking.  What things that are on your 'not going to happen' list (and you should have such a list public to avoid any misunderstanding)? Include them. On the opposite line of thinking, if there is something that you really want to try or already like (i.e. bondage, spanking, anal, etc), tell people. It helps open up the conversation and also will help you find people with similar interests.In a few words, explain what you are seeking. Perhaps it something like "We are a professional couple looking for like-minded single men who have busy lives but enjoy friends with benefits as well"; or, "We are motorcycle enthusiasts looking for fellow riders for adventures both on the road and in the bedroom"; or maybe, "We spend our days working but spend our weekends boating – join us for some nude sails"; or perhaps, "We are a busy couple with kids and work but we like to escape for some fun and adventures – we don’t have a lot of time but are hoping to find others to share our limited 'fun' times." Whatever you do, don't use one of those pre-canned bios. Put some time in to writing something about you and don’t just accept the standard offerings AFF offers. That has lazy, fake and/or effortless all over it.
Not everyone is not good at writing....or typing, If you need help, look at other profiles first for ideas. There is really no prescribed limit for how much or how little you write but give people enough to tell what you are like. Take your time to write a good profile with good grammar, spelling and punctuation, write enough to tell someone that's never met you what you are seeking but DON'T write a short novel. We've seen profiles where it goes on and on and on. That has, "I've drama issues" all over it. You don't have to say, five times, 'we don't do anal'. Once is enough. LOL

Another reason to take your time is to look at your grammar, spelling and punctuation. Use the spell checker or...better yet...write your answer in Word, have it 'critique' the spelling, punctuation and then paste it to the site. To others...what you write is a reflection of who you are....so take your time. If a profile is written so poorly that it is almost unintelligible… we generally don’t go any further. We, and most of the couples we have connected with, are looking for people they can talk to and play with – unless you have no interest in conversation and are just looking for one-night stands.  You probably feel the same way. The profile is the first glimpse into who that couple/person is and you want them to have a positive first impression beyond the photos.
Depending on the site, there are areas for additional questions, more bio info, questionnaires, personal blogs, etc. Just remember to be honest. This is not a time to lie or fluff up your profile. As we said before, sooner or later you will hopefully meet people and you don’t want them to feel like they didn’t get the true story. Good luck in your writing. Oh, and if you are on AFF or Kasidie and want a free critique (as good as we can provide, anyway) send us an email and we'll give it a look and some positive reinforcement.

Conversation about Why You are Exploring the Hotwife Lifestyle

2011-02-21T06:04:00.000-08:00

Over the past four years or so, we've talked to many couples that are just 'dipping their toes' into the Hotwife lifestyle. Frequently the email correspondence (more men than women) asks us for advice in how to get their wife or girlfriend interested in getting started. I wanted to briefly discuss some whys, some questions you should talk through with your partner, and some tips on creating rules to help think about what you want to do.

First, you should really explore - in your own mind - why you are interested in the the Hotwife lifestyle. If you are doing this because you are bored with each other and/or bored with the sex between you, it's really not a good reason. The most successful couples we've seen, including ones who have been in the lifestyle a lot longer than us, enjoyed sex with each other. They enjoyed each other’s company. The lifestyle was like icing on the cake and not a replacement or a 'fix' for something wrong in their relationship. The couples we have seen who were not in solid relationships frequently found themselves with attachment issues...meaning a disillusioned partner can develop an attachment with a play partner. We have heard from some that, ultimately failed in their 'quest' and their marriages or relationships ended because of their hotwife encounter. But, we would guess, the great majority of these were not committed to each other first. Perhaps one partner had a hidden agenda and was looking for a way out. Perhaps there wasn't open communication and there was a deception of the 'why'. Before you venture in, you should ask, why am I/we attracted to the hotwife idea specifically. If you aren't solid with each other, this will put some serious stresses. Many times this will be too much for one or both of you. Be sure you talk....a lot!
So you've examined your thoughts, and you've both talked and determined you are interested in the lifestyle. What are some of the questions and conversations you should have?

How are you going to find your potential playmates....acquaintances, online search one-on-one, local clubs?

How are you going to Play? Will she play individually or will you want to play as a couple? Will you both participate?

Rules including:

How far will you go?

What is off limits?

Do you have any 'taboos' or 'kinks' you'd like to explore?

Have you both determined or have some idea about your sexuality (bi-sexuality)?

What rules for where the encounter might occur...a hotel, a residence, your home or a on-premises club?

These questions should help get some conversation moving. Make sure you listen carefully to each other's voice, give consistent feedback or, if you aren't sure, say so. Exploring some of these questions long before you actually take any action will allow you to both determine if any issues or concerns might arise long before there is a substantive issue. Look through our journey if you've time. Read them together from the beginning - if you can to - discuss some of the encounters and some of the information we've previously blogged on. Also, look at our readers comments. Many are either considering or involved in the hotwife lifestyle and can provide some valuable insight and another perspective.

Happy Valentine's Day!

2011-02-14T10:49:00.000-08:00

Today is a day to remind us of our love for each other. For us, this is an everyday event...but, admittedly after a number of years together, some days are more positive reminders than others.

For others it's a reminder of love lost. We know of one couple that, unfortunately, were temporarily separated by death recently. It was a tragic, sudden event. So, while our blog is about enjoying the lifestyle, today we are going to get a little bit romantic and reflective. There is a song that we both really love. We've made it one of our songs. It's a story of love and a story of reunion some day. We hope you enjoy and we hope that you will tell the person most closest to you how you feel about them today.....and everyday.

On a teaser note....we had a wonderful time Saturday night with the other couple and single guy. We'll update you, probably over a couple posts, later this week with the details. Tonight, we're spending the evening with each other...no outside distractions....as it should be on Valentine's Day. We hope you get the opportunity to do the same.

What the Hell is Kasidie?

2011-02-12T16:37:00.000-08:00

Earlier this week, we mentioned this word and had a lot of questions phrased exactly like the title. At the urging of a couple we met recently, we checked out this new, up-and-coming website. It's a site mostly dedicated to couples meeting couples but there are some singles on as well and there is some great content. The site is one we just mentioned this week called Kasidie. They really have a great site and some fun and interesting perspectives on what to do and what not to do when exploring the swinging lifestyle. They also have an extensive list of locall clubs, parties and other social gatherings that members post to let others know of upcoming events. They even have some funny content:

We really liked this site...so much that we've added it to our recommended reads. You can sign up for a trial memmbership and not even have to give them a credit card or other 'identifying' information. So give it a look and let us know what you think!

Have a great rest of your weekend! We are actually heading out for a nice dinner tonight and then meeting a couple AND a single guy they invited along. It's our first potential venture into combining an evening with another couple AND a single male. We'll let you know how the three boy/two girl combination works. According to this couple....it's the perfect number ;) Off to get ready!

A Funny Video Introducing the Hotwife and Swing Lifestyle

2011-02-10T14:31:00.000-08:00

We recently saw a video we had previously seen but couldn't find again. It was actually on a website for a club we were considering checking out that allows both couples, single women and a select few, single men. One avenue we've often discusses in meeting men to explore the MFM lifestyle is clubs. We've found that most 'screen' these and have a strict set of rules(as well as designated nights when they can and can't come) that have proven to save us some time. Hope this works....we've not added a video here in quite some time. Let us know what you think...it's quite educational as well as funny!

Valentine's Day is Next Week (hint hint)

2011-02-07T08:13:00.000-08:00

We've been pretty quiet lately dealing with some family issues and such but I wanted to hop on today to remind the men in our lives....fellas...you have one week! Now is our chance to win us over on the most commercially romantic (lol) day of the year. So, what to get us. Well, if you are ordering online, you better get busy....today!

I know it is a made up holiday. I know it's not really fair to you guys because you are 'forced' to find us something special...this less than 45 days after having to do so for Christmas! But, it is your chance to get us in that special mood and re-acquaint us with your romantic side (or for some, acquiant us LOL). I know there are many guy readers that are also desiring to open up our naughty sides. Well, some advice from someone that, at one time, wasn't so open to the naughty side (pause...pause...okay, maybe not so much lol).

If you are looking to open up our naughty side...or perhaps take it 'up a notch', make sure you mix romantic in with naughty. Buy us something nice AND something naughty. Going to buy us some sexy lingerie? Take the time to learn our size and buy us a classic black dress or some nice heels. Going to buy us a new sexy toy like the Ashley's Jack Rabbit Vibrator Sex Toy? Buy us a nice ankle bracelet, necklace or earrings. Going to get us an online membership to the panty of the month club, AdultFriendFinder or Kasidie? Get us in the mood first with some flowers or chocolates (yes, I know it may be 'cheesy romance' but, I for one still love a premium chocolate!).

I also still love a card, preferably...a blank one. One with a photo on the cover and YOUR words on the inside. And is great about this. He likes expressing his thoughts rather than having someone say them for him. Not a great writer? Look at cards and mirror their message. Look at poems and write one down with a simple.."I saw this and my thoughts drifted to you...as they always do". Ooooh, I do love those wonderful cards he's written that mix in the romantic with the sensual. Give it a try. NOW. Yes, I am a planner and...if you aren't, this is your wakeup call to get busy now. The best laid plans seem to slip away if you don't get started early...today if you've not already done so. Get busy guys.

Ladies, I am already done with And's gift. While not 'romantic', our men don't seem to care if it's thoughtful. It could be that new cordless drill, a premium car wash at the full service place in town or a pair of running shoes. The most important thing for our guys, it seems, is that we've thought about something he personally desires. That doesn't mean that we can't also be sexy. I recall a few years back ordering a little outfit online. It was for me but, And, like so many men, loved the gift more than anything I could have given him! If you are that rare female significant other looking to add some spice to your sex lives or open things up, think couples membership to the health club...along with a commitment to go....along with that sexy lingerie or toy. That is a great way to allow him to open up....a toy for you with which he can 'help' you. Or perhaps a book. Two that I've enjoyed reading, together with And, are Insatiable Wives: Women Who Stray and the Men Who Love Them and The Ethical Slut: A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures. Now there are some gift ideas that could really open up some fun discussion!

Bareback Hotwife and the Pregnancy Risk

2011-01-11T10:20:00.000-08:00

One of our insightful readers recently mentioned something I don't recall us ever addressing. He asked if we'd ever discusses something that is probably on the minds of more than one person, so we thought we'd address it in a blog entry.

He asked if we'd considered the possibility of pregnancy in our hotwife adventures. This was in response to our journey, http://hotwifephenomena.blogspot.com/2010/06/hope-everyone-had-memorial-weekend.html last summer, to allow one of our longer-term playmates to play with us 'bareback'. To be honest, it's not something we'd really ever discussed. His email actually helped us sit down and discuss the 'what ifs' as remote as they may be. It was a great discussion and I want to thank him for giving us this insight!

So, as you may recall, my tubes are tied. With the exception of this one man, who we've not seen in some time, we always played using condoms. This was/is for a couple reasons. First and foremost in, I think both, our minds, was the real issue of STD. We do know that more than one of our playmates has had a bi experience. We also know some where we are not the only couple they see. In fact, most have been with experience so there are other partners they play with. It's just a hunch but a guy that responds to our ad or we meet through some other avenue is probably a guy that has slept with more than the 'average' number of partners. Now, most say they play safe and disease-free. But, and this was one of my initial obstacles/fears, I worried about STDs. When we discussed this, we both agreed condoms would be required for any adventures.

Another reason for our use of condoms was to have something for just us. While other men would have intercourse with me, And would be the only one that I've, since we've been together, had sex without a condom. That was something that we wanted to 'save' for just us. We have, many times, fantasized about me fucking a guy without a condom when we'd have sex. But, with the exception of this one guy last summer, we've kept this fantasy. You may also recall that, while we 'broke' this barrier, he wasn't allowed to cum inside me. That, I think we still want to maintain as something between us.

I do know some take the fantasy one (or more) step(s) further. We've read blogs where the couple gets turned on seeing another fucking their hotwife without a condom. We understand this as we've fantasized about it. And has even verbalized to me, his fantasy of, "seeing another guy's milky cream oozing from his freshly fucked, gorgeous slut's pussy". When we've discussed this though, we both agree it's best a fantasy for us for now.

Other couples go further in their eroticism with the bareback idea. As our insightful follower accurately described it, some are excited by the idea of playing 'reproductive roulette' or going so far as to hoping another will impregnate their hotwife. We've also read from some that like the idea of having 'sloppy seconds' or being told to 'clean her up' orally. The furthest we've gone with this is And bringing me a warm towel and cleaning a guy's cum off my body (I think I've mentioned that I love cum but hate it when it cools to less than body temp...uuucckkk). I think these ideas are probably more along the lines with being a 'cuckold'...perhaps with some bi sexual thoughts....something about which we, personally, don't really get turned on.

So, the other idea that was presented was 'what if'. This lead to a lot of discussion. Primarily, since our experience with bareback has been singular is...what if the man I played with last summer had, somehow, impregnated me. Now, while this is completely remote, since he didn't cum in me (yes, I know you can get pregnant without) and my tubes are tied, I suppose it is medically possible. So, what would we do? That's a question to which I don't really have an answer. I believe in the sanctity of life. So that would be a consideration. But, would I expect him to be involved? Would we raise him as if And were his father? Would we even tell the guy? Those are really tough questions and, even after we discussed them thoroughly, I don't have answers. I guess the answer is, it would be a remote, complete surprise and there would have to be some deep soul searching to figure out how to deal with it. Fortunately, we don't, nor have any thoughts of, becoming pregnant. But, just the discussion itself makes me extra concerned...should I make sure my procedure is still good? Should we take extra steps? I do know we'll probably not play bareback any time soon again...but that has more to do with personal wishes versus worrying about something happening. I do have to say...writing this, masturbating Wednesday, I was thinking how wonderful it would feel to have G's big mushroom head cock unsheathed inside And's gorgeous slut ;) Think I have an erotic infatuation for this handsome man! LOL

Our Favorite Method of Finding a Guy

2011-01-07T07:37:00.000-08:00

I don’t mean it to sound like a commercial….really! We mean this to be educational and we really do get this question all the time. The last post, we mentioned "our favorite website" and we’ve said before that we prefer to ‘screen’ our potential men for our MFM (or my solo) adventures online. Just like regular, plain vanilla dating sites, the presence of so many adult ‘personal dating’ sites obviously speaks to the fact that we aren’t alone. But with so many options, what site do we recommend a couple join to find the right single male to explore making the hotwife fantasy a reality?

We have tried a number of them. We have even gone the ‘cheap’ route of Craigslist….trying to find a single male there is like a needle in a haystack. Our time (and the cleanliness of our inbox) keeps us from using this route but for the most desperate of circumstances (and desperate is what you are more likely than not to find on CL). Don’t get me wrong, it’s possible. There are legitimate men out there on Craigslist that we’ve found. But, more times than not, you get guys that aren’t who they say they are, get cold feet, don’t show up or disappoint in…well…they lie.

So we find that paid membership sites are definitely the way to go. We’ve tried a number of them and still find that the best for finding that ‘right’ male is still AdultFriendFinder. I am sure you’ve seen it. It is to online adult dating what eBay or Amazon is to online shopping. Sure there are others. But this site simply has the most men, and couples, of any site out there. You’ll find the greatest variety, photos, description, testimonials from other members that have met the person you are viewing (and you can even check out the profile of who is writing the testimonial to say, ‘yeah, they look to be of similar quality as us’ or ‘eeew, he slept with her?’ LOL). In sheer number, you’ll not find any site even close to the number of single men as AFF (as we affectionately call it).

We’ve been on a number of sites. Many primarily cater to couples. In our opinion, you’ll find that it’s more difficult finding the right male when the site is focused on couples…swingers. We’ve also found that most these sites have a ‘lesser quality’ of men.

We also think that if you sign up, you should go the extra effort and sign up for a paying membership. The reasons are many. First, signing up for a ‘regular’ membership doesn’t get you much. You can’t email other members, you can only see tiny boxes of photos and you can only read the profiles. Also, having a ‘gold’ or even a ‘silver’ membership allows you to be seen. Gold members get listed first in search results. What this allows you to do is ‘screen’ without having to go ‘search’. Believe me, the men will find you! It allows the gold membership to do all the work and you simply say, yes, maybe or no. You can communicate and, if and when you are comfortable, take the next step and plan a public meeting. Having a gold membership also says ‘we are for real and willing to put our money where our mouth is in committing to finding the right guy.’ I know we don’t even bother with a guy that hasn’t paid for a membership (I mean, having a regular membership is no different than a guy putting an ad, or responding to, an ad on Craigslist.

Finally, we think you should take the time to write out, edit, and spell check what you want to say. Look at other ads for ideas but make the ad your own. If you’d like some help editing, we’d be glad to help. Just shoot us an email with your ad and we’ll gladly take a look and tell you what we think. We also think if you are going to put up an ad up, put some photos on your profile. They don’t have to be anything ‘identifying’. The gods know, we certainly don’t want our neighbors, family or co-workers knowing of our choice (although, if they are looking and find you, aren’t they just as guilty? LOL) and we do everything we can to hide our identity until we really know a person is real and for real (perhaps some time we’ll add a blog entry on some pointers here too). But have fun with this. Plan an evening to do a “photo shoot”. Buy some sexy lingerie, make the bed, send the kids to grandma’s, put on some music and light some candles and do a sexy photo shoot. Take the best of this, as well as some ‘natural’ shots, crop/mask them and post them on your profile.

We will also say, if you are a guy that is looking to meet couples, there is no better site for finding couples that are interested in finding you than Adultfriendfinder. Going to a site, like LL or any of the other sites that cater to couples, will find you frustrated. They want to meet couples….not single men! You can also go to a site looking that caters to finding single women but we know your spam filter isn’t strong enough to avoid the multitude of Viagra and Russian women just dying to meet you. Going the route of a site like AFF allows you to have an inbox where you, too, can screen the real couples. We will say the same thing about couples, guys. If they are not paying members, it’s no different that scouring Craigslist like the other 20,000 guys. You get what you pay…nothing. Oh one thing about photos you post, guys. Don’t just show your manhood. Every couple knows you have one. What women want to see is your overall appearance, your smile, your eyes, your hair. They want to know that you are sane. Everyone has a cock and, while size may matter to some, to most women, it’s down the list of important attributes to get them to respond.

We will be up front and tell you that we were so convinced that AdultFriendFinder was the best site, a couple years ago, we added an ‘affiliate’ account. We figured, since we were using it, paying for it, and recommending it, we might as well receive some credit for it. So, yes, we do receive credit toward our own account if you sign up (and if you click thru one of these ‘other colored links to AFF, we get credit). But, we hope, if you are going to sign up, you’ll help us out in offsetting some of what we would have to pay by signing up. Think of it as your way of saying ‘thank you’ to us for the guidance and the, hopefully, education we provide. We certainly aren’t getting rich off this. We also don’t take our ‘endorsement’ lightly. We simply think that if you are reading this blog, trying to mine your way toward finding out how to enrich your relationship and have an interest in making this a reality, this is the best way to go.

We now return you to your regular programming. :)

Love This Deep Throat Photo

2011-01-05T11:45:00.000-08:00

I saw this photo and think it is one of the hottest images I've ever seen. While I prefer thick cock for intercourse, there is something quite erotic (that gets me extremely wet) about taking a man deep in my throat. The other night has me thinking...can I with G? I don't think it's possible. He was just too thick a head but I can't wait to try! This photo speaks for itself...so sexy!

Damn, I think I might have to go get my rabbit out and play with her!

We Certainly Didn't Plan for That!

2011-01-01T16:40:00.000-08:00

So, while And is busy watching football, I thought I'd write a quick note about our evening Friday night.

We had a great time arriving at the club around 9:15. It was already hopping - something out of the norm on the couple other times we went. Usually, if you arrive before 10 or so, you can get a table (or if we are lucky perhaps a lounge couch/booth to be shared among a few sexy couples and singles). But, I guess with it being New Years Eve and all everyone more 'experienced' realized what we did not and arrived early. I also thought, since there was an RSVP guest list, it wouldn't be quite as crowded as it was.

Since it was New Years Eve, it certainly wasn't a cheap party. The cover charge alone is more than we pay for a year membership to our favorite website! But the atmosphere and definitely upscale class of peeps here made that normally steep price a bit more palatable. We also noticed the price of drinks, normally $8-10 (yes, stripper club prices LOL) had went up even further. Good thing we had dinner and a bottle of wine before arriving. One for me (no more for And since he was driving) to sip on and lots of ice was all the bartender would get out of me! I really don't want to paint the wrong impression. We aren't a cheap date...LOL

Anyway, we stood for some time talking and meeting a few couples we'd seen before (some whom we really didn't know but they were friendly faces) before I saw the most handsome man. Now, women are fickle characters and everyone has a certain "taste". Mine is a bit on the slimmer, swimmer's or runner's build of a body. Give me some nice looking hands, a broad set of shoulders and place it on a good set of abs and the rest is negotiable! LOL He had a bit of a 'boyish' face with the most infectious grin and he caught me looking at him more than once. Apparently, he liked what he saw because his eyes caught mine on a few occasions. And noticed me checking him out too but didn't say too much.

When one of the couples that was sitting near him took off to the dance floor or to powder their noses (okay I know guys don't do that) or something, I saw an opening to approach him. And looked a bit 'startled' at my sudden burst but as my hand left his, he gave me a bit of a squeeze that let me know everything was certainly fine from where he stood. I introduced myself to this gorgeous man and he asked if I would like to sit down. I didn't need a second invitation. He asked if my husband would like to join and I told him, 'perhaps in a bit' to which he laughed and seemed to catch eyes with And. I looked over at And and caught his eye and knew all was good with him.

We spoke for a bit, he asked if I'd like a drink and caught the attention of a cocktail waitress (something I think he must have done before as he knew her name). He asked what my husband (I still hadn't mentioned And's name to him) was drinking and I told him, just a Coke for him, he's driving. He ordered and asked...'so are you not staying long?' I told him we weren't going to be out to late, explaining that we had a sitter that was a younger girl and I didn't want to keep her there too late. He seemed cutely disappointed at this until I added, "But the night is still young, isn't it?" He said, "Indeed. It is."

I motioned And over and after finishing a conversation he was having with a familiar couple, he came over and introduced himself. G told And..."Sorry, I've nothing in the way of companionship for you." And didn't miss a beat when he said something like, "that's okay, I've my companion and she's free to roam." We all chatted for a bit, explaining a bit of our 'experiences'. G was one of the select few men the club had accepted to come to this party, obviously. He said he knew a number of the couples, had some fun with a couple of them and certainly looked forward to these parties.

And told him along the way that we weren't much of the party couple. We told him we preferred the online route and he agreed that it was much easier to screen couples. He mentioned having a profile on a couple sites (one being our favorite) and said he actually had met a couple online that he was supposed to 'hook up with' that night. We felt a bit like an intrusion until he told us that it was okay. They were running late, at another party and he'd be meeting up with them a bit later.

We talked more, all went to the dance floor once (had some flirtatious fun with G, And and another couple near us that was quite lovely) and some more talk. We mentioned that we weren't staying for the 'ball drop' at midnight and made sure we exchanged information...online profile names and phone numbers. I certainly thought that might be all until G mentioned the upstairs "club rooms". He had a pass (we weren't cool enough, or hadn't spent enough to get access) and asked if we'd like to check it out. We told him of our issue and he told us he could get us in under his pass. Not having checked this out (or really being aware of it) we were certainly curious. So we decided to get a quick tour.

When we arrived upstairs, the bouncer dude knew G and he waved us through as G told him we were with him. The large rooms are basically set up with different "themes" much like you might imagine. Most have couches, tables for drinks and at least one bed (canopied and skirted for any privacy one might want, of course). There were a lot of 'members' and they were quite crowded so we just peeked in and looked around as G explained the obvious themes and pointed out different features. There wasn't a lot of 'play' going on but some fun was being had at the third room we viewed.

We watched from the door as a woman was giving a guy a very erotic blowjob in front of a few people who almost seemed to not notice. As I watched her, I became a bit horny and without thinking too much grabbed And and G's hands and led them closer. As we approached, I commented to the 'blowee' that she was very hot and that looked fun. She stopped for only a second, hand still on the nice cock she was holding and smiled saying, 'it is'. I didn't want to seem intrusive so I turned back to both And and G and said, that looks fun. With that, I moved my hands to each of their pants and rubbed their already firm, hidden cocks. This seemed to turn both on and took that as an opening. I wedged between them kissing And full on the lips...one hand behind me on G's, obviously thick, cock and And's wonderful tool. And whispered to me that this was unexpected and reminding me we didn't have much time. I told him, I don't think this will take long and with that, I went to my knees, turned around and, somewhat frantically, tugged at G's belt and zipper.

Out popped one beautiful cock. It was veiny, half erect with a gorgeous, very large mushroom head. He was indeed very thick...much thicker than a man of his slim build should legally carry and I was more than happy to play with it with my tongue and hands. I felt And's hands on my shoulders as he watched and looked up to see G's wonderful grin looking down at my lips surrounding (as best I could) his large head. I wasn't even thinking about who might be watching but the thought, when it did enter my mind, only heightened my desire to give a great blowjob. As G stood there, I worked magic with my lips and tongue. Before I knew it, I could feel him firming up and knew he was close. I did my best to take it in my mouth but he had a tremendous load that spilled onto my chin and dripped to parts unknown. He did this, letting go this huge load, without even a noise. The only reaction I could tell (besides his obviously huge ejaculate) was his hand on my head as he emptied himself into my slutty mouth.

As I always do, I swallowed as much as I could and then kissed and sucked gently and allowing him some recovery in a muted way. When the pulses had passed, I heard him say, "Wow, I guess I had been saving that" and "the other couple might be a bit disappointed...as may I, now". I said, "It was certainly my pleasure". After getting up and 'adjusting myself, smacking my lips, I told G we really needed to get going. I kissed him full, my mouth still tasting of his just-released cum. He didn't hesitate (something I find really hot is a guy that is willing to kiss me after I've just tasted his cum), thanking me and thanking And. I told him we'd be in touch. With that, we said goodbye.

As we walked to the car, And held me tightly next to him telling me how hot and unexpected that was. I told him that I was still really horny and we'd need to get the babysitter home quickly. The ride home had me sucking my gorgeous husband's cock, playing with my clit and I was so wet and bothered when we finally arrived home, I couldn't wait to get And alone. Fortunately, our baby sitter had called her parents to come pick her up and I didn't have to wait to long!

Happy New Year to you all! Mine is off to a wonderful start and I am...as soon as I finish this, looking G up online and messaging him right away. Can't wait to feel that big head inside me....soon!

Happy New Year! We Found our Poll

2010-12-31T07:08:00.000-08:00

We are heading out tonight for a fun party at a club we've visited before. Looking forward to moving toward 2011 with Eyes Wide Open :)

We found a poll that we'd posted some time ago that seems to go unnoticed. We are trying to figure out a way to bring it to one of our sidebars (it's kinda wordy so we may re-set and reconfigure it) but once we re-post it, we hope to get some of our current readers to add their "vote".

So, as we end 2010 and look forward to 2011, where are you in your "hotwife experience?" Look for the poll on the side bar!

My Reflection on Why I Enjoy my Hotwife Life

2010-12-28T17:28:00.000-08:00

A few weeks back, someone asked for me to 'expound' on the seven points about the progression of 'becoming a hotwife'. I think we've covered much of this in our own journey and rather than regurgitate that information, I'd encourage you to read through our posts, ask us questions (either here or by email) and we'll be happy to answer or post on a particular, uncovered aspect of how we arrived to where we are today and my feelings on any of these 'stages'. We started on this blogging journey a bit after "stage one" so perhaps reading those posts will give you some insight into how we arrived here today.

However, this question, or rather - a request for follow-up - had me reflecting on what it is (beyond the obvious physical enjoyment) that I enjoy so much. Sex is so much more mental than people realize. In fact, isn't our physical attached to our brains? Like most every other woman, the key to getting me in the sack and letting loose (no pun intended) is to stimulate my mind.

But I think I am going a bit deeper in my thinking as we continue this journey and I am beginning to realize something. It's really about empowerment. It is (far be it for me to sound like a feminist - as I am definitely NOT) something about self-esteem and freedom to grow that really intrigues me and has me more in love with my man than ever. I don't know if either of us realized this when this began, but this journey has increased my confidence, my self-esteem and my feelings of being a partner, rather than chattel, than I ever knew.

Think about it. Society tells us that when another man shows any interest in a "taken" woman, the normal male response is to show jealousy, ward off the offending male...cock block...some of my girlfriends would say. What is the nature of this? It says, 'I own her.' It says, 'she is mine.' Now, while I am sure there are many women that prefer being "owned" or "taken", what does this say about us as women? We are like domestic animals? Objects of ownership?

Being flirted with, desired and the center of a man or, in the case where And and I play together, men's attention definitely has increased my own sense of sexiness and self-esteem. I am flattered! It confirms that I am desirable enough to attract a complete stranger. As a woman approaching her late 30's, the attention I get has me feeling more desirable today despite not being as young as I once was. It also makes me feel completely confident that a man is willing to take the risk of being involved with someone he knows, in most cases LOL, is a married woman.

It also gives me sense of the deep love of my partner. At first, I (and I am sure most every woman has similar feelings) questioned this. I remember those feelings that And didn't love me. That, perhaps, he wanted permission to play and this was his excuse. That I wasn't "enough" for him. However, with his continued support and our great communication (and, most importantly, the confirmation I received after our initial 'testing of the waters'), I learned that it was really his deep love - and his desire to see me reaching my fullest potential as a sexy woman - that allowed him to overcome any thoughts of jealousy. He truly confirmed his...dare I say...worship of me as a beautiful, sexy, woman.

Society or, I should say, American culture, teaches all of us as women that we are to be faithful women...even in the face of our men being allowed to flirt, cheat and lie. Why is it such a double standard? It has to come from some primitive patriarchic society that has us believing that men are somehow more important. And how has that worked for us so far? Jealousy, ownership and keeping secrets, I think, has only lead to a high divorce rates, domestic violence and unhappy marriages that have a lack of communication or respect. In fact, I think that it ultimately leads to women in America feeling lesser than true partners in a marriage.

Okay, enough of my endless philosophy of what is wrong with America. I love America, by the way, LOL. I should hop off to get dinner started. I hope everyone had a wonderful Christmas. We are looking forward to New Years Eve. While not much the party people, we are heading to a New Years' Eve party at a local club that caters to couples as well as singles they've screened. The good part about all that is there are a lot of couples looking for other couples. The few, mostly good-looking, prescreened men are pretty laid back and not pushy at all. This isn't our preferred way of going about finding men (we like the online sites) and we don't plan on 'playing' on this night (as we need to get home to relieve the baby sitter); but, it's certainly a fun night to meet other couples, share stories and, perhaps...just perhaps, meet a new man for some occasional fun!

Happy New Year!

Why Would a Guy Want another Man to Sleep with his Wife?

2010-12-16T22:35:00.000-08:00

I remember reading long ago about a thread of comments asking for advice from a woman whose husband had asked for advice on a "vanilla" message board about her husband's fantasy. Of course, to many, this seems crazy. Comments such as 'he's having an affair and wants you to sleep with another man' or 'he's gay' or 'he doesn't love you anymore' are quite common among the typical uneducated. But, what I remember keeping is a list of "debunking" reasons that I wanted to post here...so that our readers who are considering, or have begun to enter, this amazing life can ponder. Here is a wonderful synopsis of the NOT WHY's:

I am latently homosexual:
No our erotic thoughts are of women, and watching a woman and man go at it is not gay, guys watch live porn all the time. The focus is the woman and her sexuality. Yes we discuss the guy’s equipment and body, but that is in the context of how he will look with her, no different than picking out a favorite porn movie. Do you think people watched Mandingo for the wallpaper color? Beside the porn show stars the most favorite woman in the world, the wife.

I am not "manly"
Seems many porn sites refer to this life as the husband is a schmuck. Well I do understand the mate poaching fantasy, and it is ok for the boyfriend/bull to experience it, but within the comfort of the couple. Well look at all the Hollywood studs who are rich and good looking, their marriage disintegrate in short order. Their wives are out sneaking in no time because the marriage is not what they hoped for. We HWHubs/Cucks do not need to put on airs, we can watch him do her, and know who she loves and is coming home to. We allow wifey to live free, and thus pursue her happiness, not be tied to my macho wanna-be ideas. So we live in the real world more than the John Wayne hopefuls.

The wife must not be satisfied with her husband:
What nobody ever ate some dessert after being full of a good dinner? Do we eat only at one restaurant? Variety is the spice of life. Sex between spouses of most HW couples is excellent on its own, now put hot sex in turbo. How many typical guys complain their wives are frigid and boring? Most HW's are ready, willing, and able to take her husband to the next level. Why? Because her marriage is a happy home full of love, communication and respect. Those are the elements of a satisfying marriage, which leads to sex the vanillas only dream of.

I am looking to get rid of or I don't love my wife:
This one ticks me off. If I wanted to leave her the door works just fine. Sickos who want to tape her just to show the judge are not lifestylers, they are something else. What if the other guy fucks her so good she leaves me for him? Well I am glad to have this information about her sooner than later. Odds are she was looking to leave and this gave her the excuse she was looking for. (Hardcore Cucks might look for this, but again choice) Again these are not issues of the lifestyle, they are other issues before the other ever man arrived. Loving someone so much that you would risk another lover for her? Love with out freedom is slavery, and false, we love of free will. If I wanted a cheap slut to watch fuck, I could hire a call girl. No, we want the intimate meaning this life brings for us. We love her so much we trust her to go get fucked, scream with ecstasy, and try things she did not think to try with husband. And welcome her home hotter for her than the first time you had her. Yeah we do not love our wives, enough said.

Finally, I must be insane:
So many times you hear women/men act all offended and say "leave him now, only a sicko would want you to sleep around like some slut." I bet most of them are out screwing behind someone’s back, they just have a power trip to be on TV trying to look important. Of course many of these negative people also say that when a woman dresses provocative she deserved to be raped and other silly statements. Some are not into the life, and that is fine. We all have the right to choose our values, not shove them down other people’s throats. Some couples use sex toys, or erotic aids to set a mood. We just go for the aid of a living person. Besides there is good evidence that we are not really hardwired to be monogamous. Women are designed to show, men are designed to watch, women can receive multi partners easier than most men. What consenting adults do that harm no one is fine. What happened to personal freedom? Yeah a happy marriage how insane is that.

Finding a Potential M for your MFM

2010-12-10T15:28:00.000-08:00

So you've disclosed your desire for a Hotwife and perhaps, Cuckold, relationship to your partner. Now comes the more difficult part...finding a possible man to begin this journey. It seems easy. Men are, by nature, very easy to find. Looking at Craigslist or AdultFriendFinder or any number of other sites, you'll find many, many men interested in being the "selected male". But, it's not so easy.

You want exactly the right person. I mean, this is a FIRST and a first only happens once. Further, you need to find that guy that will not turn you off from further developing what, you hope, will be a lifelong journey of learning and new sexual experiences. You need someone that understands and is respectful of your relationship. You want someone that isn't at his first rodeo but not someone that has slept around and, god forbid, attracted some disease that could potentially be passed on.

There are many ways to go about finding someone that can be discreet and someone you are comfortable. One that we personally endorse is finding someone outside your normal "realm" of acquaintances. We love the Internet! I am quite sure this has widely expanded the discussion as well as the potential partner base exponentially. While we've used sites such as Craigslist to find playmates on occasion, we find that sites that cater to those looking (and willing to put their hard-earned money out to do so) are more serious, more experienced and, frankly, more trustworthy.

Of course the possible sex partner could be found from someone you already know. Perhaps it is a friend, acquaintance or co-worker. Perhaps the couple will network with people they know in order to locate a potential sex partner that they are both "comfortable" approaching. In most cases using this search, it will, most likely, evolve over a long period of time. It will take some time and some "exploration' - perhaps thru flirtation on the woman's part or indirect discussion of the matter from the husband. But what if the man chosen proves to not be all that you hoped he'd be? How do you know if he's even a good partner for your wife? The possibilities of awkwardness in seeing each other again could be devastating and could put an end.

We also like the idea of going to a "club" that caters to couples. Most deal with couples seeking couples but many provide guest passes to a select number of "single" men. They typically will screen these candidates and only allow a small number of men. While this has the advantages of knowing that these men are interested, the numbers are typically low and, perhaps, she doesn't find anyone present to whom she's attracted. Most "clubs" charge some cover or membership fee that can prove costly.

Having gone thru this process ourselves and our best advice...especially for the first encounter...flirt and try things out with someone you know but, when it comes to really going forward, find someone you don't personally know. Screen thru email correspondence, text, phone calls, meeting in public with no expectations of anything more than an introduction. Find someone that is patient and will wait for the time to be right. Someone not pushy, someone....perfect.

Thoughts on the Wife of a Cuckold

2010-12-05T14:43:00.000-08:00

To follow up on what we wrote last month about Cuckolds (seems we've a recent theme here...I think because we are both continually searching for "defining" and redefining our evolutionary relationship) we wanted to talk about the idea of what a wife of a cuckold may feel or experience. To do this, we want to again build and add our own take on what others have written. Women whose men have told them of their desires may find the following information particularly helpful. So, men...share :)

A woman who finds herself committed to a Cuckold will go through a number of emotional experiences and behavioral stages before she actually achieves the status of "Hot Wife" - a wife who is openly sexually active with other males.

According to research done by several psychologists, women tend to initially respond to their male's suggestions and requests and coaxing for sex with another male with shock, dismay, and revulsion. These emotions are followed closely by genuine worry over whether the man has lost interest in her sexually, and/or whether the man is angry at her and seeking to degrade her, and/or whether the man no longer loves her and whether, perhaps, their relationship is in danger.

In many cases studied by psychologists, Cuckold males manage to get around this initial blockade of negative emotions and worry by constantly reassuring the woman about existing love and how having sex with another male is really "okay" with him, "stimulating" or "exciting". The Cuckold will make every effort to calm his wife's fears and worries and get rid of her anger and revulsion by bringing up the subject and doing everything possible to convince her that he not only wants her to take a sex partner, but that he wants her to "expand her sexual horizons", "experience greater sexual pleasure" and "stimulation and excitement", etc.

It is at this stage where the female will either reject the male partner's suggestions completely and absolutely refuse to consider it further (in which case the husband/partner must either give up and let go of the idea as simply a "fantasy-not-to-be" or allow his partner some time to consider and then, at a later date, hope to convince her) or the wife/girlfriend may agree or show mild interest in the idea of participating in a sexual fling with a strange male.

If she shows interest, it is rarely an intense interest. Women confronted with these suggestions and desires on the part of their mate will typically try to hide any genuine excitement they may be feeling - perhaps because they don't want to admit that they find the idea really captivating (perhaps fearing this is some jealousy "trap"). Most women take some time to get over feelings that their husbands want to "farm them out" or "lend" them to another male. While - according to psychologists attempting to understand the motivations of the Cuckold - these feelings are not at all accurate, the women of these men tend to think and react negatively - feeling that they are somehow being used or trapped.

If the woman moves from stubborn refusal or grudgingly willing to consider this encounter, the relationship may proceed in the following ways:

1. She will continually seek verification from her husband that it is REALLY "okay" with him if she has a sexual fling.

2. She will, most likely, experience extreme nervous anxiety over meeting the sex partner her husband chooses for her.

3. She may have second thoughts or perhaps "pull out" or reject the arrangement several times before meeting the potential sex partner or perhaps she will meet and, again, "pull back" before actually having sex with him.

4. If she eventually has sex with the partner - after doing so - she will again seek confirmation from her husband that he is still "okay" with what has taken place. She may be extremely nervous about his reaction to the reality of what has happened.

5. She will tend to wait for her husband to suggest that she meet with the sex partner for a second time before having sex once again. She might state that the partner wants to "see her again", but this is to get the husband to state that he agrees with her continuing her association with the new partner.

6. She may begin having regular sex with the sex partner or have sex with additional partners. She may gradually even become more "brazen" about "flaunting" her relationship in public. She may even begin bringing the partner to their home for sex.

7. She will cease asking her husband for permission to meet the partner and will take control of the situation and orchestrate the meetings according to her own desires and time table.

Once a sexual fling begins between these wives and their sex partners, it can continue for months or even years on a steady basis and may become a "fixture" within the relationship dynamic.

A lot to digest, I know. We'll continue to share additional thoughts on our journey. If you are newer to our blog, we would suggest starting at the beginning and working through some of our blog posts to see how our journey has progressed to where it is today. Nothing like seeing someone's personal history from the beginning to shed light into one's own possible journey...or decision to not proceed.

Hotwife Turned Upside Down...Hothusband? LOL

2010-11-30T21:52:00.000-08:00

So, I know I only described the first half of our evening but I think it probably was the more important half given our audience. However, it's only fair I go ahead and finish this before too much time elapses.

As I previously wrote, Rach had a desire to see Kevin again and we set that up. She also suggested I find someone with which to play and I was fortunate enough to find an agreeable couple. Rach and Kevin met up while I listened in from my hotel room. If you've not read the first parts of this evening, I encourage you to read the posts titled A Follow Up on Kevin parts 1 and 2 below.

So while Rach and I spoke, I received a text from K thanking me for the evening and a couple photo messages with a wonderful view of my hot wife sucking his worthwhile-sized cock. Rach looked so very sexy...the expression on her face told me she knew this photo was for me. Perhaps that is what they had spoken about between us hanging up and her calling me back.

She asked details about when I was going to meet the couple. I told her at 10 PM. She asked the scenario and I told her it was her and I with him mostly watching. She mmmm'd and was genuinely turned on.

For those of you reading this going, "huh?" I guess I should back up about 15 steps LOL. We've not written much about this 'exposure' but some time back Rach and I discussed me meeting couples on my own. I was intrigued because I wanted to get the 'other perspective' of being the 3rd. This wasn't to be my first experience with this but my first in some time. Confession that I am not sure we've shared...prior to Rach and I meeting, I've had experience as the "m" in an MFM.

The couple, T and G, arrived as planned at 10 PM. I had left the phone next to the bed as I answered the door...still on but upside down. Rach now was going to hear her man with another woman. We had some small talk and I began to play with G while T watched. As things progressed, I found it a thorough turn on that Rach was listening. I am not going to go thru the details of our encounter as I don't think, just yet (or perhaps at all) they are the subject of our "Hotwife Experiences" blog. I will say that I fucked G hard, long....longer than K had fucked Rach...and I was completely focused on my sexy wife at home that I knew was listening in.

Before I go on to much further, I want to give Rach the opportunity to describe all of this from her perspective. For one, I think our readers tend to respond more to what she writes (judging by the email replies LOL) and, for another, I think it is more appropriate getting the Hotwife herself to tell you. It only seems appropriate for purposes of our blog.

A Follow Up on Kevin - 2nd part

2010-11-27T08:45:00.000-08:00

Writing frantically before heading out for a walk with Rach's family...Didn't want to leave anything hanging and, if you are just getting back from your Thanksgiving Holiday reading this the following week...start below and come back to this post.

Where was I....I think I was mentioning that I had found someone to meet from the ads I reviewed and replied...I heard back from a couple that actually wanted a "traveling businessman". I fit that bill, LOL, so I decided to reply. They turned out to be serious and ready and we made plans to meet after the workday for dinner. We met, had a drink and they were obviously experienced and ready to play. They were ready then and there but I indicated that I had a special request. I wanted Rach to listen in. We agreed to meet later that evening and, as soon as they left, I called Rach to tell her.

Rach was excited we were able to set this up. As she would be meeting Kevin in less than an hour, she quickly told me she was getting ready and that she'd call me back in a bit. In the interim, she sent me some sexy photos showing me what she was wearing and told me she was actually more nervous than she'd been in some time. Her nervousness told me, she really wanted this to work out. She called me back telling me he had text messaged her and that she'd put me on speaker after he arrived. While we were talking, she told me..."He's here" and quickly said goodbye and that she'd call back soon. (Again, those surging feelings of...jealousy? Why could she not just keep me on speaker?)

She did call back about ten minutes later...it felt like hours...as they were approaching our bedroom. I could hear them giggle, noises and I knew...he was down on her. She moaned, shortened her breath and then I heard her say "I want to suck your cock". There was a period of silence followed by him moaning, the sound of a photo being taken, and then it began. I heard my Rach mention a condom and then the sound of fucking. Mostly, I could hear Rach. One, because the phone was beside her and; two, Kevin was mostly quiet while fucking. He was giving her a fuck similar to our first. He had the same stamina as I had recalled the previous time and thoroughly pleasured her. I could clearly hear sounds of his hips 'slapping' into my bride and heard him come with a loud moan. While this was occurring, I found myself torn between wanting to 'save myself' for my upcoming turn and wanting to stroke my cock. I decided to choose the later and, three orgasms later, they were done.

Rach put the phone to her ear as they were getting dressed and said "baby, I will call you in just a few" and hung up to my "okay". She did just that and described and re-covered all that I had missed in the phone translation. Quite hot. Even more so was her reference to my upcoming meeting. She asked, "So are you excited?" and "I'll bet you'll fuck her good". Indeed, I had motivation to do one better LOL

Okay, more later on this night. I need to get going....but hopefully this didn't leave you hanging about Kevin.

A Follow Up on "Kevin"

2010-11-26T22:53:00.000-08:00

NOTE: Longer than I expected..in a hurry...so this will have to be part 1....

The in-laws and girls are in bed so I thought I'd write a quick post about something many of you have been asking. Sorry, we didn't have time for photos but I think, to many of you, the following will come as a welcome continuation of our posts this summer.

Many of you asked about our friend that we called "Kevin" (we long ago decided that we'd put somewhat anonymous names to Rach's play partners - but forgive us if we re-use or we get confused! LOL). We decided it's past time we update.

After some long reflection and much discussion, we decided...a few weeks ago...to contact him again. Actually, it was Rach that brought it up. One night while I was out of town on business, she was feeling pretty 'naughty and horny'. We had thought about going about something we had tried before (more about that wonderfully interesting and fun night soon...promise!)

Instead of going that route, she said, 'I could call Kevin and see if he was available'. Now with this came an initial pang...a familiar one...was it jealousy? No. Not so much as a much as one familiar to our "cuck" friends. One where she had brought his name up obviously because she enjoyed him and, despite some reservations, she felt strong enough about the pleasure he brought to bring him back.

I quickly felt some relief from these feelings knowing that it was me she loved. She was really in a mood for some fun and we both agreed this would be a better alternative to the random stranger we'd not really adequately screened. He was a known person and I felt comfortable that he had not contacted her (still feeling a tinge of anger that he had not gone thru me to discuss meeting 'us' again.

I told her she should make the call. It seemed that since he had contacted her, I was out of town, and it was to be her and him alone, it seemed right. Perhaps that was wrong but that was my reasoning (we aren't perfect either, ya know LOL). She called me back less than ten minutes later, excited, giddy almost. She said that within 20 seconds of them conversing he mentioned that he thought perhaps he might have done something wrong and that is why we hadn't been back in touch with him.

She explained that that was, indeed, the case. That the communication with her directly without any attempt to contact me had both sat wrong with us. He apologized and said he truly didn't mean any wrong. They then discussed meeting and he indicated that he was free that night. A+ for availability LOL

Rach told me she wanted me to be on the phone. That she felt like she wanted to share this experience with me. That she wanted me on the line for safety as well but it was mostly because she wanted to "share" this experience with me. However, she had a twist. She wanted me to find someone with which to also play. So, I set about doing just that. I scanned MW4M ads on Craigslist...I know, I know...but I was in a strange city and didn't have time to prescreen a hard-to-find single female on AdultFriendFinder. It must have been fate because I found an ad that wanted to have something similar to us.....sorry, to be continued...soon!

The Cuckold and the Black Bull

2010-11-23T19:48:00.000-08:00

So after posting the results of the poll, we had a number of questions asking us to define what a cuckold is..exactly LOL. I laugh because I think there are as many definitions and thoughts as to what defines a cuckold as there are people asking. Everyone has their own definition of what makes and what doesn't make a cuckold. If you do a Google search on the topic, you'll find many interesting perspectives. I found this one that I thought was an interesting twist on what defines a cuckold that involves the often discussed Black Male. We don't really adhere to many of these thoughts. I think that's why we define ourselves as having a "hotwife" relationship while not defining it as a "cuckold" relationship. Still, there are some similar elements it is of interest to many so we thought we'd post it (with some edits for grammatical changes).

A "Cuckold" husband is someone who finds the idea of his wife having sexual flings with other men highly arousing and stimulating. The Cuckold husband attempts to convince his wife to embark on sexual flings with other men and - if successful in this - he will then seek out a man who makes the most desirable partner (in his view) for his wife. In the case of white Cuckolds, it is a commonality that a bigger, stronger, exceptionally athletic - and possibly younger - black male (often called a "Bull") will be considered as the most desirable partner for the wife. There are a number of reasons for this.

First, this type of black Bull is seen, in the eyes of the husband, as physically superior and, thus, far more capable in terms of sexual activity than the Cuckold considers himself to be. The logic behind this choice of sex partners is that if the other male is bigger, stronger, far more athletic - and possibly younger - the wife will receive the maximum in terms of sexual stimulation, long-lasting intercourse and the experience of many exotic positions during intercourse due to the greater strength and endowment of the chosen black male.

Second, in the mind of the Cuckold husband, a black Bull represents more of an exciting "taboo" union for a married white woman than would another white man. Tied into this is the contrast of skin color and the erotic visual it provides when the wife and sex partner are having sex.

Third, the white Cuckold male wants a number of things to result from the sexual union between his wife and the chosen sex partner.

1. He wants his wife "tamed" or perhaps "overwhelmed" sexually. He wants her "taken and made to like it" so to speak, or "put in her place" sexually.

2. He wants his wife to experience sexual stimulation, excitement, and intercourse far greater in intensity, size and far longer-lasting than the Cuckold himself can provide the wife.

3. He wants his wife to openly acknowledge that the sex partner is far superior to him ( the husband ) both physically and sexually and - when she does this - he is provided with a genuine feeling of being "put in his place". He may often exhibit submissive behavior toward his wife and her sex partner. In other words, the Cuckold desires to be dominated in this way as much as he desires his wife to be dominated and overwhelmed by the sex partner.

4. He wants his wife to feel sexually uninhibited and unrestrained and feels that such intense sex experiences will take her to this condition.

5. He wants to feel inferior and submissive and will be exceptionally enthusiastic about his wife and her sex partner playing in the couple's home rather than in some other location. When the wife and sex partner do this, the husband will watch and experience intense sexual arousal at seeing his wife being "serviced" by the partner who the husband considers as being physically far superior to himself.

We do see some distance similarities to this. We've also seen reference to the fact that many Cuckolds are not, in every day life, submissive or see themselves as "inferior". On the contrary, many are successful, confident, intelligent men.

While we don't share the viewpoint of the Black bull, I think we've both have fantasized about this - but no more many other "scenarios" (like a large group, stranger meetings, bar pick-ups...many more :) ). It's, honestly, been more me than And that has stopped us from going further in this direction. Perhaps some day I'll be comfortable sharing my thoughts on that here. In the mean time, we'd love to hear our readers’ thoughts on the black Bull fantasy. Just hit the "comment" and reply. Of course, if you'd like to respond more anonymously, you can email us - and perhaps, with your approval, we'll re-post your thoughts....anonymously.

Ta ta for now! Oh and Happy Thanksgiving! :) Perhaps we'll even find time for some "turkey day" photos!

An Interesting Look at the Poll Results

2010-11-18T07:45:00.000-08:00

I happened to glance at the "results" of the polls we have on the side bar on our blog page. While we haven't thought of too many "polls" to give (any suggestions?), we have two.

One asks whether the person(s) viewing is a couple or single person and asks the gender. We aren't too surprised to know that more men than women read...after all this is a blog about discovering the MFM experience and - as I (And) was - most men are the initiators of this "journey". It is a pleasant surprise to see that the #2 group is couples reading this together. We hope that number, more than any other, continues to grow. Perhaps some of the single males that have voted have since introduced our blog to their SO and can revote :)

The results of the second poll, the personality poll, still surprise us. More than any other category, the "cuckold" is the top personality. Perhaps this goes hand-in-hand with the "single male" being the top vote-getter in the previous poll but I was still surprised that this is higher than the "watcher". I think another surprise is that these two categories far outweigh all the votes from the other categories COMBINED. The risk taker, the top, the bottom and the student all are equally the same but far, far behind the other categories.

So, I think it's about time for another poll. I am currently at a loss as to what that poll should be. Hmmm, any suggestions? Post it in the comments or send us an email. Despite the recent lack of postings, we do check (and try to respond) to as much email as we receive. Thank you all for your continued correspondence. I feel like we've made some great pen pals that share our interest. New friends, along with everything we've learned along the way, make this all very worthwhile.

A Rare Book Review about Opening Up your Relationship

2010-11-13T14:05:00.000-08:00

Often, we receive emails from couples (or a partner in a couple) about how they might begin to open up the possibility of expanding their monogamous relationship to MFM (or, on occasion FMF or couples). Typically, this type of email is the result of one partner "breaking the ice" and making the initial step of talking about spicing up the relationship.

This summer, we read a book together that I think may help a number of our blog friends. Hopefully, reading it (preferably together) you may find a way to further communicate about your desires, fears and concerns and hopes for augmenting your relationship with each other. The book is called Opening Up: A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships, written by Tristan Taormino.

While the sexual aspect is discussed, Opening Up focuses more on the emotional and interpersonal relationship aspect side of things. We think this is far more important to discuss with each other (the physical side will come later after you thoroughly face the emotional aspect). Tristan interviewed more than 120 people who are already in various "open relationships" and a considerable number of viewpoints are discussed to help you better understand (and hopefully communicate) the ideas and emotional obstacles you may face. The book isn't necessarily focused on hotwife or MFM encounters. It talks about couples opening up their relationship in any way shape or form - whether it be discussing bi-sexuality, polyamory or hotwifery. What it is really all about is helping your relationship by reshaping your thinking about relationships. Once you can discuss this together, we think this book might help you reshape the general feeling about thinking monogamy versus nonmonogamy and all that this "opens up".

Bottom line, what Tristan is trying to describe is that once you open your relationship you realize that - unlike with monogamy - there is a wide variety of experience and types of open relationships out there...things you may not have otherwise considered.

What we found most refreshing about Opening Up is the continued focused importance on the mental and emotional aspects. This book may help you in discussing, together, how this might work before you jump in unprepared. We truly hate to think of people rushing into something for the sexual aspect before thinking about what’s going to happen with jealousy and hurt feelings and the fall out of their rash decision.

The book contains a very good discussion of the term compersion. Compersion is the idea that you can personally find pleasure from someone you love or care about deriving pleasure with another. We know this is an emotion we thoroughly "get" and we believe it is the cornerstone from having an open relationship without jealousy. From our point of view, it took a LONG time of discussion and understanding before we truly felt comfortable with where we are today. Perhaps this book can help you in discussing further with your partner what it is you desire and help in overcoming their concerns.

We've read a few other books (I am an avid reader and And is an introspective Virgo geek that has to analyze EVERYTHING). Hopefully, in the next few days, we can post some of our favorite reads on the side bar to, perhaps, help those of you that like to read. We'll share more about our more recent events as well.

You Make an Excellent Point, Mr Mathers

2010-10-15T08:55:00.000-07:00

While I've some time, I thought I'd send an update. As Mr. Mathers (knew a guy in college by that last name LOL) accurately pointed out, when we leave for a bit and come back, we don't always do a good job of bringing everything current. So here goes....

The guy we played with without a condom we saw a couple more times during the summer. It was great but he sorta went away and we didn't really do a good job of trying to stay in touch and now he's just...gone. Oh well, it's a big pond. We never did get to the point where he came inside me. He always shot his orgasm on me instead. I hate saying this, perhaps it's a different post, but sometimes, I don't really like the guy cumming on me. LOL. Condoms sorta make that a non-issue. I like the idea of a guy cumming on me. I do. It feels amazing "powerful" to make a man cum and then feeling it shoot on my body but...I also want a warm towel right away too LOL. I don't like cooling cum on me for very long. Haha So we've still kept cumming inside me that to ourselves...that and anal sex are two things reserved for just And.

Kevin, the perfect encounter, we haven't seen since either. We talked about him some. There's no ill feelings. And had some concerns, we talked, addressed them and we've discussed it in detail. And's over it and I am comfortable. And asked if I'd like to see him again. I would, I think. I just haven't initiated.

We've been more focused on each other the past couple months. We've had a couple of threesomes with a single man I met but nothing to really speak about. We've started exploring the "couples scene" more lately. Checking out profiles and chatting with couples (with bi-sexual women hehe). We went to a club together and met a few intelligent, sexy, attractive people. I kissed an Asian girl (she was a horrible kisser and had small lips, yuck) and we met some great couples. I think we'll go to the club again at some point soon...when we get that desire to just "go" again. We've chatted with a few guys online and by text. I've been feeling naughty lately and And keeps saying he has a surprise for me. (He's much better at keeping secrets than me).

Hope you enjoyed the photos. I loved making them. I've been feeling a bit conscientious about my body lately so I've been working out and really watching what I eat much better (I was pretty undisciplined last spring and even early summer). I feel better and, with time, have started to feel better about how I am looking. I want to get back to where I was last summer. I look at photos from them and think...Wow, I was a sexy MILF. I want to be that again and stay there!

I better run. I've a full day of tasks to get done!

Wow, I Love My Hot Wife's Ass

2010-10-12T17:45:00.000-07:00

Since we've been MIA for about two months, we thought we'd send a quick post with some eye candy. Here are some photos of Rach - one as recent as last week. She's been working out pretty consistently. I guess that might have something to do with the new boyfriend. One of the benefits of having a wife that loves having sex with other men is she is always working on her body. Not bad for a 30...something ehh?

There are more on our profile on AFF. Rach continues to see a couple men...mostly one right now. We've also been playing a bit more with the idea of some new couples in our area. We attended a club that isn't outwardly "Adult" but tends to attract a number of people in the "lifestyle". We don't really consider ourselves a part of this group. We don't attend mixers, private parties and, outside a couple of online profiles (mostly directed at finding hot men for her), we don't really look for couples "events". Still, it was fun to mix and mingle among the sexy crowd. If you've thought about introducing your husband or wife to something "more", you might look for similar clubs in your area.

The Armor Kink explained

2010-08-16T06:45:00.000-07:00

All is good ladies and gents..and for the record, I DID watch Kill Bill - both volumes just a couple weeks ago! LOL

Kevin hasn't communicated with her since the text. That, to me, is a good sign. Of course, he hasn't contacted me either - via text or email - so maybe he simply moved on. Perhaps he also realized he "effed" up by doing that and is now deciding he should simply remain silent.

I am still of the opinion that - if that was his realization - the "perfect gentleman" would simply send an attempted apology. Something like, "Hey, sorry if I did something wrong. I messaged Rach directly (which you probably know about by now) and I do apologize. I got a bit carried away because she's such a gorgeous woman and I didn't mean anything by it". Something like that, gentlemen who are reading this and wanting to learn to be the perfect third, would go a long way (or better yet, don't do it at all unless you've asked permission). Admission of wrong is much better than silence. Besides, even if I was thinking he had disrespectful thoughts what's the worst I would reply..."not cool, don't do it again" or perhaps a more understanding "No worries. Let's just make sure we communicate between men first". I guess the worst response could be "listen, you fucked up and blew it"...but I don't think I really set the tone that I would be that type prior to our meeting. I think I am a pretty laid back guy..except when you disrespect my girl.

Okay, now I DO sound sensitive LOL...which I really am not. I am over whatever slight twinge of...dare I say, jealousy (ouch!) I felt. I am not even sure it was jealousy so much as disrespect. Maybe that's what set me off a bit.

I wasn't really worried about Rach. I guess I was more so wondering if she was telling me because it unsettled her (which it did a bit) or if she was telling me to see my reaction. She later told me that it really did not "sit right" with her and that it was his first strike (she plays by modified rules...two strikes and goodbye LOL). Since she and I have discussed it briefly and I think she is a bit less pessimistic about his intent.

In truth, Rach and I are pretty in tune with each other's thoughts Most of the time scarily so, like finishing each others sentences or thinking the same random thought and expressing it when the other is thinking it...now that, to me is wonderfully the closest thing to soulmates one could attain. So perhaps I was simply sensing her uneasiness and getting my protective guard up. I am not the biggest guy but I am not the smallest either. Mess with my woman and there would be an unrivaled rage that would have me possessed! LOL

Anyway, I've decided I am just going to contact him. Send him a constructive-criticism type text...sorta a "hey buddy" and let him know that it's not something that we want to come between us. After all, Rach did like him. Outside of that one mess up, he was the perfect encounter...gentleman until we got into private quarters, the right amount of aggressiveness (more so than others we've lately experienced) but not over the top, excused himself when he determined that it was the right time....oh.. and she did like that thicker cock too ;)

How Do I Introduce the Hotwife Idea?

2010-08-07T07:24:00.000-07:00

We are asked this question a lot. For us, it came gradually. As you can see from our earlier posts, very gradually. We talked about it for years! But our journey doesn't necessarily reflect others. Ideally, for us, I think we probably would have "got there" a lot quicker had we discussed this while we were still dating! But for many, they are years into a relationship and have thought about it often but never revealed it to their Significant Other. Understandably, it's something you a) might believe you are not normal to have such thoughts (you are far more normal than you think - 80% of men, it's been quoted have thought about this)or b) fear your mate's reaction (will she think you just want an excuse to sleep with other women or will he think he's not enough for you.

It suppose it is normal for those who are curious about this lifestyle to ask us how they might get their SO to venture into the wife having sex with another man. There is something magical and mysterious about the event - even for us - having crossed this frontier. For us, there was an early-on moment that seemed to open the door to that first time. It's best to wait, however, to when she gives you a signal that she is interested and ready...if you lead the way.

Have you ever played erotic photographer? Well, if you haven't, it can be a lot of fun. Some women aren't confident about their appearance and don't want you taking photographs of them. Some really get into it. If you have the former, try having sex with the lights on first...then trying a photography session with a consistent encouragement about how beautiful she looks. At some point, when you sense she is really into it, you could simply make the comment: "What we need is someone here to take the photos of us." From there, the possibilities are endless in adding a "third" to your love-making.

Does she own any toys? If not, perhaps a special gift on a special day would allow you to introduce it (just don't make this the ONLY gift and wait until there is a private moment to give it to her - maybe after a romantic "date night"). My favorite? The ever-popular "Rabbit". Now this can come as a Dolphin or a Swan or whatever, but it's really the best, most popular toy out there. With the internet these days, you can discreetly order one and, in so doing you are opening up the Hotwife idea. It's probably one of the easiest ways to introduce the topic...assuming she'd be comfortable playing with toys...something with which you may need to help her. Many women grew up with the idea that playing with vibrators or dildos was dirty. You'll need to overcome that barrier if it exists and show her that you love watching her play.By giving it as a gift, you are saying, I'd like to participate in the play. Perhaps after a few sessions, you can begin to talk about the fantasy...imagining that the toy is instead another man.

Have you any adult clubs in the area that cater to "swingers"? that you might take her to? Now, we aren't talking about full on on-premises type clubs. That may be too much for her. But where we live, there are a few clubs that appear "normal" that cater to "older couples" (30's and 40's) that have a definite swingers social network to them. Not completely in the open but more sexually advanced than the normal club atmosphere. Perhaps you can take her feigning that you heard of a great new place that seems to attract more mature people. Most of these nightclubs will also allow a select number of men to enter. From there, you can take her to the dance floor, perhaps strike a conversation with another man, or simply leave to use the restroom and allow her to watch the action. If she senses that this is a "swinger club" - and be careful that it's not too obvious - you can tell her that, 'yeah, it does have a bit of that feel'. Whether you decide to stay or not, it may lead to some interesting conversation that may lead into talk of fantasy you or she may have that will allow you to bring up the idea.

We do encourage you to have a real conversation about it...and the earlier in the relationship, as we've said we believe, the better. If you've years of marriage, you might bring up the idea as a fantasy to "spice up the lovemaking". However you introduce it, be gentle, be non-judgmental if she doesn't react positively at first and be patient.

As another blog so accurately puts it:
"The best way to establish a (hotwife) relationship is to be open about your interest. If you don't try to pressure or enforce the idea, it will likely begin to work on her and she will gradually become excited by the prospect without your coaching. The key is for her to realize that the activity does not include you having sex with other women. This is about your interest in her. You will know the process has begun when she starts to ask you all sorts of questions as to how it would function or why you find it exciting. Depending on her upbringing, it may take hours or years for her to brave (enough to ask) you these questions. Be assured she will be thinking about them, in any event.

It is well known that women tend to find sexual satisfaction in an stable, emotionally secure relationship. If she is assured (she has that with you and) by you - that her sexual adventures will add to the stability and security of her relationship with you - it can open up a new way of looking at things and she just might surprise you by how quickly she takes action once she understands your feelings."

Another Hotwife/Cuckold Point of View

2010-07-31T18:36:00.000-07:00

Recently, I read what is a wonderful description of the Hotwife Experience. The writer was not interested in sharing his wife with complete strangers. "To each his own" as he said. What he did find exciting was a relationship with another man and his wife. Many couples consider the "poly-amorous" lifestyle but reject it as being too odd an idea in our society. Fair enough, it isn't widely accepted. I do recall one girl I went to school with that had "two dads". I thought it strange, as did most my classmates. I don't think we completely understood the concept believing, instead that her real dad and her step dad had simply decided to co-habitate for, what we thought, were economical or child-rearing reasons. Now, I reflect back on that and this story sounds interesting familiar...and, dare I say, slightly intriguing. Here's the story as it's written (with typographical edits...just a habit I can't shake LOL):

"I think that everyone is entitled to do as they wish, so long as all parties agree. That said, I'd never let strangers have sex with my wife under any circumstances. But as I said, to each his own.

You may find the following a contradiction based on my comments, but I've been "sharing" my wife for over 10 years. We've been doing this with a high school friend of mine who has remained a dear friend of ours. He's been divorced from his wife for over 10 years now. Not only is our friend a great guy friend of mine - he and I love the NFL, car racing, etc. He has a deep and caring relationship with my wife. My wife was a borderline alcoholic 15 years ago and he was a key part of her recovery. He did it with no motive besides worrying about her well being.

Does my wife and our friend love each other? Without question. Yes! But NOT as in marital love. They love each other as dear friends. Hell, I love him too!

So why do I share my wife with him? Because they make each other feel good. I like the fact that someone else finds my wife attractive and sexy (which she is). It adds a difficult-to-describe spice to the sex I have with my wife. I am not threatened by any of this. In fact I encourage it.

My wife and I make love three times a week on average and it's always fantastic! Both my wife and I like the fact that her body has responded sexually with him. There are times I am inside of her and I get a surge of passion with the thought that just last week he was inside of her - his shaft sliding in and out of her vaginal passage. It must have felt so good! My wife and our friend actually make love. He doesn't "fuck" her. They care for each other far too much to do that. Does she want him instead of me? No way! Does he want to steal her from me? No way! Do they want to give each other intimate sexual pleasure? Hell yes! The sexual pleasure they experience with each other heightens the sex my wife and I have with each other.

Over the last 10 years I'd say I was NOT witness to their sex 95% of the time. Yes, I've watched them. A few times I've even taken part. But it's too raw and distracting for everyone. When I've watched them, the two of them make love just like she and I do. They don't restrict themselves to simple, pussy pounding intercourse, I've actually watched him on top of her, holding her hips, kissing her face and mouth, whispering to her, telling her how good she feels - she wordlessly gasping back to him. I've watched the two of them cum together at the same instant, both of them simultaneously pumping out their orgasms on each other, kissing passionately, thrusting their hips towards each other, and then quietly laying on top of each other for 5 minutes afterwards, the two of them gently kissing and hugging, he lightly touching and fondling her breasts in their orgasmic aftermath.

What does this sex do for my wife and me? We want each other even more. It makes our sex even better. I cum inside of her with explicit thoughts of him ejaculating inside her vagina into the same exact spot I will be. When I feel her pussy contract during its orgasm I think at how he felt the exact same sensations. I feel lust with the thought the he made HER cum. I feel lust with the thought that her vaginal passage made HIM cum. Perhaps the biggest turn on is that she makes love to me in exactly the same way I've seen the two of them make love. Does this mean I am getting short changed? No way! If you saw how she made love to me and enjoyed letting out her most primitive, instinctive sexual responses, you'd know that she was giving me everything. I watch them very occasionally but most times I let them do their thing together.

On one weekend getaway the three of us took, they proudly and admittedly made love for five solid hours while I sat on the beach. They told me they actually napped between orgasms, the two of them falling asleep after one set of orgasms with him still inside of her. This made me love and want her even more - knowing she gave and received so much pleasure. Even though I wasn't there with them, I knew EXACTLY what they did. I even knew EXACTLY how her vagina contracted and pumped on his shaft when she came. I knew EXACTLY how he felt when he ejaculated inside of her.

When they are done, do I then go in and have sex with her? Very seldom because she's already been sexually relieved and satisfied. But the next night or two after? Hell yes. We make love - me getting everything she is emotionally and physically capable - which is one hell of a lot. I hope this at least partially explains my feelings on the matter. It is a very complex issue. I could write many more pages on the subtleties of this situation and why it works for us."

We could too...and do! We enjoy reading well-written, thoughtful postings such as this and love the insight they provide. We hope you do too and hope we are giving you some glimpses - beyond our relationship - into the variations of what it means to have a hotwife relationship.

As for us, I'll let her, in fact encourage her to, fuck strangers! To each their own, right?

A Kink in the Armor

2010-07-29T12:06:00.000-07:00

I just received a call from Rach. Apparently, Kevin contacted her via text message. The text said "Let me know if you want to experience my thickness again sometime soon".

Not sure how to take that. Before I overreact, I thought I'd throw it out for our blog friends. At first, I thought does she want to see him again? Is that why she is telling me? Then she texted me saying, 'The message left me a bit uncomfortable". I clarified, 'K. Is that a good uncomfortable or a bad one!'. Her reply was 'I'm not sure? :( It just bothered me some' Granted, we did give him her cell number at the end of the night. But, up until that point, the communication had run through me.

After the night concluded (and by that I mean Rach and I had a wonderful session and she was nearing sleep), I sent him a text from my phone. It was a message saying, 'Thank you for a perfect evening. You were a perfect gentleman and we look forward to seeing you again some time". He replied back shortly after saying 'I really enjoyed meeting you. You are a great couple and I would love the opportunity'.

So, why message her? It just struck me as odd. As I said, perhaps I am overly sensitive to this today and, before I act, I wanted to get some feedback. As you know, I am not normally someone that gets jealous. I believe Rach told me for 'disclosure' and nothing more. But perhaps I am reading her wrong. I am sure we'll talk about it more tonight when I arrive home. In the mean time, what is your take?

Some Photos from her Night of Thick Cock

2010-07-27T06:50:00.000-07:00

Have an early morning but thought I'd post these before the day gets away. I darkened the photo a bit but Rach is still a bit nervous with this. She is a bit worried he'll see them and get concerned about his identity. I told her a cock is not an identity and there is nothing to worry about (unless you've been on Adult FriendFinder and have been lucky enough to find this gentleman and meet up with him - and we're not talking!) So, here goes nothing. Enjoy now before she asks me to take them down!

The Thick One concluded?

2010-07-23T13:49:00.000-07:00

So, I didn't get back to this the next night as I anticipated. In fact, we went away on a mini vacation witht he girls and just returned home Wednesday. So, I thought I had better get back to this before it turned into another hiatus.

After we had some chat, we decided to go ahead and just come out and ask Kevin if he'd like to come back to our hotel room, next door to the restaurant/bar and enjoy an evening of fun with us. He was, naturally, interested LOL.

As we walked, I tried to walk a few steps ahead. I did this to allow Kevin and Rach to converse, wondering if he might put his hand in hers (something that would be totally hot but, alas, he didn't) and just grow comfortable with each other. It was quite obvious that they already were but I never know just how comfortable a guy is going to be with her once the action really begins so I like to give them every opportunity to warm up. When we arrived back at the room, I asked if anyone would like a drink. Darn....no ice. Yet another way for me to give them some time alone and get to know each other. So off I went, searching for some ice.

It was a bit farther than I anticipated and when I slid the card in and opened the door I was not too surprised to already see Rach on the bed, sitting, Kevin in front of her with his pants open and his semi-erect cock in her gorgeous mouth. I quickly placed the ice down, made some drinks and watched as he enjoyed her lovely lips. He was indeed thicker - a bit shorter perhaps but her mouth was definitely stretching around his shaft.

I grabbed the camera and took some photos (to follow if we are fortunate enough to receive the right comments). She spent some time doing what she most loves to do. She gets so wet and turned on sucking cock - particularly a stranger's. I helped her undress as she did and came around her neck as she was sucking to kiss her. I am not interested in sharing, but there is something amazingly erotic about being right next to her, kissing her neck, holding her shoulders or fondling her beautiful breasts while she has a cock in her mouth a few inches away.

Once undressed, Kevin decided he needed to taste and touch what he could already visibly see...her plump pussy lips wet with anticipation. She laid down quickly as he did and allow him a full legs wide view and he began stoking her clit and tasting her sweetness. This was obviously my que to undress and allow her to suck my cock while she had a stranger's lips on her. Rach likes to put a hand on the back of the man that is giving her oral while the other is on my cock in her hand. She quickly came to the first of many orgasms. After some time and a few more shivering, shaking orgasms, I asked if she would like to have two cocks right in her face alternating (for our photo viewing later). She looked so damn sexy as she first placed my cock in her mouth, stroked his thick member and then switched doing the same for Kevin. That's when she really surprised me.

Rach asked if Kevin would be comfortable trying a double penetration. Now, I know she is not so much into anal...except when really turned on. He said, "of course" and I asked her to make sure. She asked if I could help prepare her. So while she again sucked Kevin's cock (I think she was really liking the extra thickness) I lubed up with her already naturally-flowing juices and slowly entered her ass. Wow, was she tight. After we worked on this, her telling Kevin, "oh god, he's in my ass" she was ready. Kevin put a condom on, laid down under Rach and I watched my beautiful lover, full on take his sheathed cock from on top. Wow, what a view. As Rach laid forward onto him, she opened her ass and I slowly put the head of my cock inside her. Wow, was she ever full. It was an odd sensation as I could really feel the massiveness of his cock, just a thin wall away, buried deep in her pussy.

We didn't get to far with this as Rach quickly decided that was "almost" meaning it is, too much. Normally, I try to press her buttons a bit and give her a little extra to get her to take more than she thinks she can. However, I am also greatly in tune with just how much she can take and I knew when she said that, she had enough of that. It was fun but enough was enough LOL

Since he was already sheathed, we all decided it was time for Rach to really feel what Kevin was like sliding in and out of her. She laid back down and Kevin slid her to the edge of the bed and they began fucking. I held her breast as I kissed her and told her what a "beautiful little slut" she was" and asking her how she felt. She replied "he's really thick, baby and I am loving it". I moved away to take more photos and that's when the really impressive started to happen.

Most the guys I've seen her with fuck. They do so in a rather rythemic pattern - nothing too much (almost as if she were a porcelain doll they were going to break. Not Kevin. He started that way but quickly became more aggressive and really started pounding her good. She reacted similarly as she does to me. Asking for more, telling him to fuck her even harder. He obliged. At one point, she turned her legs up and he nearly flipped her over, pressing his cock between her legs from his knees and really burying his girthy cock into her. I took this as another photo opp and the look on her face (which, unfortunately I will NOT be sharing) was priceless. To add to it, I took another with my fingers in her mouth, her lower lip pressed open, her eyes rolled back, totally enjoying the moment.

After I could see that Rach had enough, I asked Kevin if he could cum on her. I asked Rach where, and she said "all over". So first he, then I came all over her tummy, breasts and a bit on her face. She collapsed as our loads dripped off her onto the bed.

Kevin proved himself to be the total gentleman. After I went in to get a warm towel, he disposed of the condom, graciously said good night and excused himself. Rach and I, of course, had another wild fuck session as I reclaimed my girl and relived the moments...just the two of us. I sent Kevin a text from my phone telling him he did a perfect job and thanked him. He responded with a "my pleasure".

As we lay in the wet bed (yes, Rach had squirted quite a bit on my hand - something, apparently, I hold as the "gift" that others have not yet found) she looked over and thanked me for setting this up. She said she needed this and I had picked the perfect encounter. Kinda makes a guy feel good when she tells him he did perfect.

The Thick Chosen One - Continued

2010-07-14T23:27:00.000-07:00

Sorry to keep you waiting. I don't know how many of you noticed but I didn't even have a chance to spell check the last posting (which I've since done). I was interupted when Rach's sister and their kids decided to "pop in" for a visit....of all things, after Church! So here I am, typing away in the study and the doorbell rings. So, I minimize, lock it up and go answer. After they come in and visit for a bit, Rach and her sister wanted to look up travel tickets for an upcoming trip they are taking together. I just give Rach a look like...noooo! She catches on. So, while Rach distracts her sister, I unlock the computer and click the publish button without even another glance until this morning. My apologies to my high school English (or I guess as they call it these days, Language Arts) teacher.

Anyway, where was I? Oh yes. I had surprised Rach with the room. So she packed her things..which always takes women three times as long as it should, and we were on our way.

We were out early enough to check into the hotel, situate things and allow Rach enough time to pamper herself and get ready to meet her thick man. While she was doing so, I showed her the other "semi-finalists". She commented about each one and teased my thoughts with comments like, "wow, he has a nice build. I'd have loved to put my hands on that ass while he fucked me" or "oh goodness, that is a thick one, I am not sure how I'd fit that in my mouth...but it would be fun tryin' (with a wink).

After she prepped for the night, we went to the restaurant and had dinner. A very nice, romantic time for us both. I could tell that Rach was anxious about meeting my choice. I think that the fact that she hadn't any idea who I'd picked, besides the few photos and correspondence I had read to her, made her more nervous than normal. I too was a bit nervous but not about the guy being who he claimed to be. My radar had picked up that he was genuine. I was more concerned with whether he'd actually show! That's the one BIG chance you take not going with the premium, paying member from a "lifestyle" site. I mean, anyone can hop on CL and many people just play with the idea. What if he was too afraid to show up? That would be a real downer that, I am sure, would disappoint us both.

We were to meet at 8 and it was now 8. Trouble was, I was still waiting for the check and he was supposed to be in the bar area. We are kinda sticklers for punctuality so neither of us wanted to be late. So, I told Rach, why don't you go see if he is there, I'll pay the bill. It will give you a chance to get to know each other like you'd normally do (sounds so funny to say, anything about this is now 'normal' but, I'm sure, you get my drift). "If he's not there, come back", I said to my gorgeous woman. "If he's there, order me a Ketel Press and I'll be over shortly". She smiled, stared me in the eye and told me she loved me as she swayed those gorgeous little hips (not sure how she gets such motion out of those petite things) away from me...of to meet her thick one.

It took me some time to get the waiter's attention (something I reflected in his final tip) to get the bill. I said, "we are meeting a friend in the bar and I need the check". At least he was quick in taking my card and returning soon with the printed receipt. I had been sitting for about 10 minutes and decided, as I walked toward the bar, that since she hadn't returned, Rach had a) found - we'll call him - Kevin...close to his real name LOL; and b) was enjoying his company (if she wasn't, I've learned, she's no problem being blunt, short and gentle in letting him be on his way). So, I decided to hit the men's room before joining them.

As I did, I looked and found them right away in a casual booth next to the bar. They were sitting across from each other, drinks (including mine) on the low rise table between them. I approached and Kevin stood, shook my hand and introduced himself. Right away, my thought was...'good, this guy has manners, is a gentleman and looks exactly as his photos'. Rach seemed pleased too. She smiled, kissed me and held my hand as we began the introductory convo. After a brief time, Kevin excused himself to the men's room, semi-jokingly commenting that he wanted to give us a moment to talk about him. All true and, again, showed he had some experience with couples. As he left, Rach said, "he's great. You did well. As she kissed my neck, she whispered, "and I think he has a really thick cock too. Before you came over, I reached over and put my hand on his trousers and it felt thick". This instantly had my blood rushing to my own head. Rach has a wonderful way of teasing me and seems to know exactly what I like to hear...her being a gorgeous, playful slut.

K, no interuptions tonight other than the witching hour. I am going to wrap this up tonight and finish tomorrow evening. I'll get to the ending as I can. Sorry to leave you hanging....again.

Picking a Thick One for Her

2010-07-11T11:26:00.000-07:00

So my lovely wife has been after me for some time to contribute. She, rightly, affirms that we started this together - and when we made the re-commitment to begin writing anew - I agreed to help. I just like hearing her thoughts written down too much haha.

A few weeks back, I decided to give her a bit of a special treat. She had been mentioning that she was really craving something extra thick. After conferring with her on 'how thick' she was talking about, I went out seeking what she desired. Now, I am not overly girthy. I know this and normally like that Rach picks out guys a bit shorter but fatter (in one area only) than me. So, perhaps this was my way of confirming for her that what she was picking was good by me.

I began looking on the always-flakey Craigslist. I posted an ad (without her knowing - and knowing she wouldn't look there because we just don't use it often...here's why) and received over 150 replies. Most are typical CL b.s. One line with a nondescript photo of a cock. It's amazing how many guys put little effort and, seriously, you don't think any cock looks girthy up close? Anyway, a few were well written, properly respectful and included some 'perspective' to the girth with which they were blessed.

After unsuccessfully communicating with some of them, I decided to go to a quality site where we've had much greater success, (Adult FriendFinder. Now, just like CL, AFF has, at least a 10-1 ratio of single guys to anything else. But, if you use the Search wisely (and you have to have a premium membership - which we do - to do so), limit your search to guys with premium membership - yes guys, if you are laying your hard-earned money out, it pays because if you are willing to do so, it says to us, you are serious in your efforts.) And look to those with testimonials, it really helps narrow the fakes and flakes.

I was looking for something in particular with this encounter, obviously, so the number and quality of the photos helped. So too did the efforts to write something legible and meaningful. The way I figure, if you put some effort into your profile, you are going to put some effort into creating a good experience for my wife.

I communicated with a few guys, looking toward specific dates. With the exception of only a couple, all the replies I received back were well thought out, added something to what they had written in their profile and really helped me find what, I knew, my sexy hotwife would desire.

So after getting it down to a few, confirming availability of all three, it was time to let my sexy Rach in on the fun. Ultimately, she would be the one deciding.

She was truly impressed (or at least she feigned it well) with the effort I had gone to in finding her a particular set of fantasy-fulfillment criteria. After discussing it, we picked one, younger (not normal for us) guy that she really liked, I was comfortable with, and seemed to have the full set of skills, experience and respect we were seeking.

We arranged a time to meet him for a drink. Now for this particular encounter, we wanted to, hopefully, meet for a drink and proceed right to play. We don't normally do this either. We, or one of us - usually Rach these days, typically meet for a coffee or other beverage and 'interview' any candidate. Since we wanted to forgo that in this instance, I surprised her, again, just before we left telling her to pack a bag. I had reserved a room at a nearby hotel.

The Temporary Drought is Over

2010-07-07T11:01:00.000-07:00

This summer has been hot...and I amnot just talking about the temperature. After a few weeks away, I am back again. Now that the 4th holiday is over, and the girls will be spending some time away until school starts, I believe And and I are going to really enjoy the summer - even more! - than we already have.

Hope everyone had a great 4th holiday. We did. After making a lame attempt at trying to find a somewhat random guy Friday night, we made a connection with a couple and met up with them for some fireworks Sunday night. The only issue we hadis that the woman said she was 'bi-selective' and it turns out that meant, you can go down on me but I won't reciprocate. And and her husband filled in nicely but it was a bit dissapointing that she wasn' into it :(. The other thing that wasn't so hot was that he was a bit 'under-sized' and didn't last as long as I wanted. And didn't really interact too much with her either. Although I gave him the green light, he said she was a bit 'chilling' toward him as well. They didn't seem to have any issues between them and were, otherwise, a very fun couple. I don't know...perhaps it was us!

We do tend to have that effect on some. I think we are just so comfortable with ourselves and, perhaps, that confidence becomes a bit intimidating for people. Lesson...as I've said before...to any couples out there thinking about couples...it's more complicated adding a fourth to the mix. We've found the single guys (and that includes drama-free or discreetly attached for us) tend to be the easiest with which to meet up. And doesn't seem to mind, even to this day, making me the center pof attention. I don't mind being in the middle either :)

I've been asking And to share an experience we had a couple weeks back. I want him to write about it because it was his 'surprise'. It wasn't a total, last minute surprise as he did get me in the loop after he started the 'gift'. I could write about it but I think it's most helpful to guys reading us that have discussed an MFM with their significant other and are hoping to 'get the ball rolling'. Let me just preface his, hopefully upcoming post with this. I'd been telling him, for some time, I wanted a really girthy cock. I am not just talking something above average. Length didn't matter, I told And. What mattered was that he was really really thick. It was somewhat curiosity, somewhat fantasy, and somewhat of a challenge. I don't want to say too much...just that he found it and it was thoroughly fun. And isn't small - certainly not length-wise. I guess I was just looking for something different. Well, he found it. I want him to write the rest because his process of screening, I think, is insightful and helpful for those men hoping to take the step from fantasy to reality. So that's enough of that for now.

Hoping you are reading our older posts and are hanging with us. I know we are not the most often posting couple but I like quality over quantity any day. Kisses!

Our Hotwife Phenomenon Viewership is Down :(

2010-06-11T10:47:00.000-07:00

So, And was showing me how we track how many people are looking at our blog. Don't worry, we can't actually 'track' you. We can only see how much 'traffic' is on the site. How many people are coming to look at our postings and how many pages they look at and how long they stay and from whence they came and things like that.

Now, I can see when we disapppeared for an extended period of time that the numbers dropped considereably. But, much to my disappointment, they've not really returned to anything close to what they were before we disappeared. I suppose it takes time. I can look, with And's help because this is all kinda foreign to me (although I am getting better), that it did take some time for people to find us. I guess it will just take some time again for people to come back. Oh well, hoping it will be bigger and better than ever soon! I like the fact that people are looking to see what is new with us and also hoping that they'll perhaps be someone that hasn't visited us before. As And always preaches to me, we started this to help others that are considering, or have initiated the idea in their relationship. As a support, as a education and, my hope is, as a way to determine whether it is something they think their relationship can handle (before going to far and really harming their relationship).

On another note, we get to see an old friend that moved away some time back. He was a lot of fun and he and And really hit it off. Unfortunately, the economy here took a dive and he had to look for work elsewhere. But, he'll be back in town this next week on business and we are hoping for reliving some old memories. He has a fantastic tongue and I am quite excited about having it touching my little kitten for hours! Of course, I'll provide him with a blow job he hasn't experienced since he left...at least that's the sweet nothings he put in his email to us when he told us of his return! And agrees. He's also said he purchases a little gift for me too...the most realistic toy he's ever seen. Looking forward to comparing it to the real thing! LOL.

Jewelry - Wear the Wedding Ring or Not?

2010-06-08T12:25:00.000-07:00

Many of our photos have asked, "Rach, do you wear your wedding ring out in public?" I guess some wonder if perhaps that is better or if it would be better to 'look single' in public. That answer, to me is a real personal one and is best left to the couple and the woman wearing the ring.

I, normally wear my ring all the time. Particularly if I am meeting a new guy - whether with or without And. Of course, the meetings we set up are guys that already know and understand what we are about. To me, it represents the bond between And and I (didn't I once say I was going to start calling And Drew to avoid the And and? LOL). If a guy that I was meeting would ever ask me, "Do you mind taking it off" - even in the nicest, most polite manner - my answer would be "Yes, I do mind" and he would most likely find himself with no further involvement with me.

I guess I could see, if your fantasy involved going to a club or restaurant/hotel bar and sitting alone and being 'picked up' that there might be advantages to looking single. But isn't it so much hotter if a guy comes up to you while he is watching having the ring on? And doesn't it also avoid any miscommuniation about your intent? In fact, it would encourage it..."So you are married?" "Yes, very happily too but I am allowed to play." If they guy turns and walks away...all the better to know up front! If he is intrigued, it could lead to further discussion, intrigue and perhaps a night of wonderful fun!

On a related note, we also get asked if I wear any other jewelry to "represent" myself as a hotwife. I think this is probably one of the most confusing codes. Now, a lot of women wear anklets. I've heard it said, and I do this myself (when I remember LOL), that wearing a toe ring on the right foot, along with an ankle bracelet on the right ankle, represents a woman available to other men.

I don't think I am quite comfortable enough to wear and obvious messaged bracelet that says "SLUT", "HOTWIFE" or "MFM", "MILF" or "COUGAR" but, as our long time readers know, I was given a wonderful ankle bracelet that I wear in public. I do like one ankle bracelet that is sold at http://www.nipplecharms.com/swinger-jewelry.html . It is a bit less obvious and, like my blue and pink ankle bracelet, allow you to discretely 'show off' your status without being too obvious. If I were to have it, I might put additional charms (which may confuse someone) to make it a bit less obvious...maybe...oh, maybe other symbols of the status. Like the letters H & W...that might work...LOL. (sorry, brainstorming).

Anyway, research and decide for yourself what to wear and what not to wear. It's really an individual decision based on where you are at and how your fantasy is being played out. As for me, it's a wedding ring, a discreet bracelet and, when I remember, a toe ring. :)

Hope everyone had a Memorial weekend

2010-06-04T08:26:00.000-07:00

I thought I'd try to get on and try to get back in the habit of writing every once in awhile again and figured I better do so before the weekend. It's been a busy week and with some of And's family coming in for a visit, I am sure I won't have time to do so this weekend.

Did you have a good Memorial Day weekend? We sure did! We invited one of my latest friends over for a barbeque (And's parents took the girls) and had a very fun time. I want to tell you that, just recently, we've taken another first in our relationship. We now have a friend, the same friend we had over last weekend, that we now play with uhm, "bareback".

Before we did so, we had quite a number of times that we only played safe with this wonderful man. However, as time went on, we decided it was turning into a bit more of a relationship. At various times, we talked about whether he was seeing anyone else, to which he replied, 'no one serious besides you'. After we clarified what that meant (he was really just saying no one he saw regularly and had any lasting friendship with), we asked if he would be seeing anyone if he was playing safe. He said, 'of course', I always play safe. What made me believe him all the more is the fact that there have been times when it's been pretty "heated" with he and I. Each and every time, without fail, he has said, 'hold on. I need to get a condom'. So, we did start thinking of him as he is always the one to initiate the need for protection.

Now, we know this guy pretty well. And and I had discussed whether we'd be comfortable playing with someone, at some point without a condom. We discussed this on more than a few ocassions. So, we decided to ask if he'd be willing to get tested. He agreed. We looked over the results together after his full battery of tests. We also asked if he ever did meet someone and played with anyone else without protection if he be willing to tell us. He said something to the effect that he didn't see that happening but if it ever did, he'd be absolutely sure to tell us. So, last weekend, for the first time, we took the plunge. He and I played without a condom and....damn was it good.

It's always been something that I've wondered about. We do play orally without protection but I've never, since I've been married to And, had another man inside me without having a shield. It was such a surreal feeling having another man's cock inside me unsheathed. Part of what has made me want to feel this particular man without the "trojan" is that he is quite veiny. And's cock is smooth...and gorgeous :) This was different. It was like a naturally ribbed condom...without the feeling of a rubber glove. Wow was it wonderful.

We didn't go as far as having him "cum" inside me. That was agreed upon beforehand. He'd pull out. Now, my tubes are tied and this guy has also had the "V". But, we want to save that for a later point in time...perhaps once we are more comfortable. Instead, he sent his gorgeous juice...and a lot of it (I didn't know he came so much until now!)...all over me. I think he even shot some over my head and onto the bed post as he grabbed a washcloth and cleaned something off above me LOL. I guess perhaps he too was excited by the prospect of playing "bareback".

After he left, And commented about how amazing it was to see another inside me without the normal white translucent covering. He and I had an amazing night of sex after that and I think I came harder than I've cum in a long time with And and I reliving the experience. He even made me breakfast the next morning as I was thoroughly worn out from the night before. What a wonderful husband!

So a photo to get this started

2010-05-26T11:56:00.000-07:00

I thought it was only fair - given our long hiatus from blogging, our attempted start last year only to fail, and the two weeks we've not posted a thing yet - to start off with a recent photo. My body goes up and down, gain a few, lose a few. When I was younger, this didn't happen quite so much! Here is a recent photo to help you understand what my, fairly current, appearance is now.

I am looking forward to discussing where we've been and what we've been doing as well as share a, now, couple year's worth of email questions and stories (hiding the identity of all involved, of course) that we've accumulated.

We are also looking to get back online a bit more and give you some information about the sources we look to for our friends. I'll also tell you the story of another couple we chatted with, talked with for a long time and, eventually, met for drinks. They haven't fared so well (something that really inspired us to get back to blogging, in fact) and we want to try to apply their experiences so that others out there, that are, perhaps for the first time, considering exploring the MFM world of hotwifery (LOL) should look out for - the real issues might surprise you.

That's all for now! Chat again with you soon!

Rach

We are back...I promise

2010-05-13T12:14:00.000-07:00

I was thinking about spring and doing some cleaning. I was realizing that, last year, we said we would be back to posting regularly and then didn't follow through on our promise. I am re-committing myself to posting again. I want to do some "catching up" and tell you what we have been up to over the past...oh, eleven months! ugh, I can't believe it's been that long.

We have still been active in our "hotwife" (as time has gone on, I am beginning to realize I can appreciate that term more and more lol) encounters. We've also "branched" out a bit and have each freely played a bit individually as well as a couple of couples we've met. I hope to recall some of those encounters as well but really want to stay focused on the subject of our blog... MFM.

Let me first re-start this with telling you how fortunate I am to have such a wonderful man. He is the bestest man on the face of the planet. My husband isn't really a jealous person but occasionally I can tell he's feeling a little bit conflicted. He wouldn't admit to it too much or that something is bothering him, but when you've been with someone so long, you pick up on these things, ya know? I guess I am saying this because before you go back in our history (or perhaps you've been there already) and look, most would wonder "how do they do it without being jealous?" Well, we have such great communication and honesty in our relationship...no judgements, no holding back thoughts to allow them to dwell inside...that we quickly are able to deal with any 'jealousy' issues. Anyway, that's not really where I was going with this but it was merely to point out that you HAVE to have that in order to still be in the relationship that we have together. If you are considering starting, or continuing, to put your feet in the water of the "hotwife phenomenom", you have to have that up front. If you aren't there, work on that before going any further. Because if you don't, you'll not make it as a couple.

Okay, off to the store, a couple quick return texts to my latest friends with benefits and to pick up the girls. I promise, I'll be back very soon!

A new friend sharing his recent hotwife enjoyment

2009-06-07T20:57:00.000-07:00

We received one of many letters we get about our blog. I wanted to share it with you all because it made us feel so very good about the work we've previously done on this blog. We know we've taken quite the hiatus from blogging in recent months but we will get back to it at some point here soon. As I am sure many of you know, life sometimes gets in the way of the best of intentions to play.

Anyway, if this letter sounds like you, give us a shout. We love, and are inspired, to hear your feedback!

Hello Rachel & Andrew,
I stumbled upon your blog a couple of days ago.
May I say:
"How Wonderful"!!!!
As is my custom when finding a new blog, I go back as far as I can to gain history and understanding.

No I have not read all of it. In fact I have only gotten to March of 2007.

I cant totally understand your frustration through the early days of your blog, for lack of two way participation.

After 27 yrs of marriage, my wife and I stuck our big toes into the water of an Open Marriage, last May. so we are still new to this. We have done some same room swap, once separate room swaps, but mostly we play together, all in one room.
She has given me the freedom to play solo, but that has not been nearly as successful as her Solo Play.

What I get the most enjoyment of is her enjoying herself, whether I'm there, or she is alone with her Friend. He has become a Friend to both of us. I'm all about Her Pleasure!

I am so hopeful that you will continue your Blog, as it has been a very insightful, wealth of information to me. I did notice there was a gap in the archives, and only 1 post for the month of May 2009.

I will be home next week and plan on sharing with my wife your blog. What has really been helpful to me, is the insight that Rach gives. It has caused many light bulbs to go on about the way my wife might see something, but not able to articulate it so I understand.

Thank you,
A New Friend

Thank you our new friend!

Getting our creative hotwife juices flowing

2009-05-04T16:40:00.000-07:00

No pun intended...LOL

I just thought I'd write a quick message today to tell you that I am thinking it is high past time we start writing in our blog again. We've been away much too long and I am hoping there are still some of our old fans interested in following what we've been doing and where we are headed. I spoke with Rach and she said she'd commit to herself to do the same. I think previously, we lacked the commitment to want to take it up again and, without that commitment, we'd be aimlessly be stringing you along with promises that we'd post without following through.

So, I'll try to provide an update as soon as I can - as in the next 48 hours - and let Rach do the same from her perspective. I think you might find the two sides similar but with slightly different perspectives as men and women have on any single subject.

We've been good. There have been a couple difficult times along the way - nothing major just typical married stuff - and some good times as well. When I say good times, I guess I am addressing the content of our blog. We haven't been as active this past winter...perhaps it is the time of year or something...but spring brings renewed energy and excitement somehow and I think we are getting that "urge" back again to have some fun.

So, check back often, add us so you can follow along on updates, or whatever is the latest way to track when we post (since we've been away for a bit there have been some changes/upgrades LOL). However you find us, we hope you'll enjoy and share a bit as well. This isn't a forum but we certainly love the participation and comments to our posts. It too, would be great to hear from old friends as well that we had contact with before. Shoot us a comment or email and let us know you're still out there!

We are fine :-)

2009-03-09T07:20:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to send out a quick note and let everyone know that we are doing fine. We just decided to take a long break from posting on our blog to spend some time doing other things in life. We will be back. We hope we haven't lost too many of you. We've spent too many hours getting to know so many of you to lose you now.

We are fine as a couple and everything is fine with each of us. We know we should have posted this much sooner than we have but we will be back. Look for us, keep us on your list of blogs and keep learning each day! We hope that perhaps some of you that have bumped across our blog later on have, or will, take the time to read some of the earlier postings and perhaps it will inspire you to share some of your thoughts on the subject with the one you love. We will try to give you an update about our time away and bring you up to speed on where we are at with our daily lives.

We hope to see you soon!

Threesome video...funny

2008-12-06T01:43:00.000-08:00

Recently, someone sent this video to us. I thought it was as good a place as any to appear on our blog. The only problem is most of it features the wrong type of threesome....it's MFM for us all the way to the hoop! Thank you for the link, kind stranger!

Cocky Coffee Meeting

2008-11-16T23:13:00.000-08:00

Update time! :) I have very few moments of free time lately, I shouldn't say that... I have few moments of free time that I have actually felt like sitting down to write. I will go into more details on that later! :)

So let's fill you in on my first of the two encounters:

Brett is someone I originally met locally through one of our adult sites. We chatted via email and a couple of times on the phone. Both And and I were comfortable with moving forward to the next step. Brett seemed charming and witty. He was a professional, married, and he was attractive. Not attractive in the way I usually like my men...tall, dark, and hard as a rock...but attractive in a more mature, fit way. I noticed from the beginning that he seemed very self-assured. I adore confident men but I think he may have passed that stage and moved on to self-centered long ago. He had this way of talking on the phone that was totally about himself...LOL. Anyway, I put aside my apprehensions about his cockiness and decided to continue talking with him to "feel him out" better. After a couple of weeks, and with And's permission to meet up with him, I decided to meet Brett for an early morning coffee meeting - after I dropped the girls off for school.

I modeled my new outfit that I planned on wearing for And. And grabbed me close to him and whispered in my ear that I should I ask Brett to describe his cock to me. The sheer thought of that made my panties wet. I wore my new turquoise dress and silver sandals, and I felt a youthful sexiness as I kissed And goodbye and proceeded to walk out that door. He said I looked stunning, kissed me hard, and his last words were, "Be safe, I love you baby."

Both Brett and I knew not to have any expectations of anything further than just meeting up today. I wanted to feel him out. So, there I was at the coffee shop, enjoying hot sips of my Americano, looking at my watch. Of course, Brett was running late. At least he had the decency to call me and let me know. Thirty minutes later, a yellow Porsche pulled up and out steps Brett.

My first impression was wow. He even has a cocky car...LOL. He was good looking and dressed well - a somewhat slight build though. He made great eye contact and immediately recognized me and gave me a hug. I walked in with him while he grabbed a cappuccino. We took our drinks outside and did not spend too much time talking because he was running so late.

Okay, one thing that brought on a kind of "creepiness" factor was that he brought me three compilation music CDs that he had mixed. I understand personal gifts after you have known someone a while, but that was kind of 'too' personal and it rubbed me the wrong way. After about ten minutes of mindless chatter, he asked if I wanted to listen to one of the songs (Norah Jones - my fav...) in his car. I responded with a quick "sure", not because I wanted to sit in his car and listen to music but, because there was still that part of me that was sexually curious. Besides, what better place to ask him the question And had suggested. LOL. So there I was, sitting next to the overly confident Brett, listening to Norah Jones, when I looked him in the eyes and asked him, "Describe your cock to me please?" He stumbled over his thoughts for just a second...and then responded, "Smooth, somewhat long, and right this moment, VERY hard." I reached my hand over and decided to take a feel for myself. Through his slacks, Brett definitely felt hard...I gave it a little squeeze and he reached into kiss me. It was a short kiss, not a lot of tongue, nothing special. We said our goodbyes, with him requesting that we meet up some place a little more personal next time. I told him I would let him know.

The first thing that went through my mind as I left was that I was was up in the air about seeing him again. He just did not completely do it for me - although knowing I turned Brett on that much was totally flattering and somewhat of a powerful feeling. Hmmm....I was undecided.

I called And, told him I was on my way home. I think he heard in my voice the tones of disappointment, he always is right in sync with me. I walked in the door and told him all about my adventure. And has this way about him that so attentive to my every word, every detail....I know that is partially due to how turned on he gets from hearing these escapades, but also because he truly adores me. He understood that I was hesitant about meeting Brett again, but also told me if I wanted to pursue it to go ahead....I have his permission. I sent Brett an email message asking about Saturday evening, he quickly replied with definitely.

This is where it gets good....LOL. Come the Thursday before our scheduled "date" - I receive an email from cocky Brett with a photo attached, he was canceling our meeting for a woman whose ad he came across in an online personal ad .... He had the nerve to send me the picture! I don't think I would be as bothered by it if I thought she was sexually attractive in some way, but maybe she was to him ... He was enticed by another and I do not handle rejection well! I immediately forwarded the message to And (who was out of town) - his response was that Brett did not deserve to be with me. Damn, I have a good man.... he knew exactly what I needed to hear right then.

Since that day, I have heard from Brett once ... to update me that his meeting with the mysterious woman did not go well. My thoughts on that - Good. And has brought to my attention that we deserve nothing but the best for me ... :)

So we have had an amazing few weeks together, focusing much of our attention on each other, our family, and just life, with a tiny bit on others.... We will share those details soon! I feel a balance in our relationship that is perfect, just playing a bit, and discovering more about each others feelings, desires, and needs on a daily basis. Life is good!

I was having trouble sleeping tonight, so I am now going to go rest my pretty little head on my pillow, right next to that hunk of a man who loves me SO much!!! Feel free to give us your input on the Brett situation. We look forward to reading what you have to say. Good night.

Adding some hotwife links

2008-11-09T22:39:00.000-08:00

We received a comment recently from Pondering and Desire...a couple interested in the hotwife lifestyle and pursuing their interest. Like us, they are taking their time, asking a lot of questions of each other and keeping the communication lines open. Their blog is refreshing. There are not enough good blogs out there that discuss, with intelligence and thought, the hotwife lifestyle.

Neither Rach or I had done much searching for new links and, frankly, the links we had needed some cleaning up. So I've been reading some of the blogs again while on the road last week and I am adding them tonight. We've also taken a couple off that seem to have disappeared. One we removed, Cuckholding Lifestyle, has some good information so we wanted to metion it here in case you'd like to check it out.

Anyway, check out Pondering and Desire and the new links. Rach has a couple entries that are in "draft" form. She writes a few sentences and then can't seem to finish them. Once she posts them, I will write about my thoughts and tell you of our trip to Sin City. I hate to leave you hanging but it was certainly a fun, albeit hurried, trip and we packed in quite a bit of fun in about...oh, 40 hours. We even had the chance to do a bit of gambling believe it or not. We are both definitely paying the price though...I don't recommend trying it and I can be quite certain we'll either plan a longer trip next time or simply scale back our fun...maybe!

It's been a few weeks since Rach's solo

2008-10-29T13:08:00.000-07:00

I know we haven't written much and I do apologize for that. We've had a very busy couple of weeks - particularly my gorgeous wife, Rach!

We've rekindled our desire for each other and recently made the decision to curtail activities for just a short period as a result of some of her recent encounters. Nothing bad. It's just that she had a few encounters and we decided to refocus for a short period of time to re-ignite passion and confirm our relationship. This was both of us making this decision. We are so in tune with each other that, without words, we know what the other is thinking. On outside encounters for her, we both decided to take a short break. Nothing major - just a few short weeks.

However, we have much to tell that has occurred over the past two, nearly three weeks since we last posted. I am going to let Rach fill in the details on the two since Ken but I can say one was fairly successful and the other, not so much. She will have to explain why this was the way it was and I think it will make much greater sense to the women in the audience than the men. Sometimes women just have preferences or something that doesn't feel right. I've learned that, over time, she is still a woman and that intuition is much stronger in that gender than ours, fellas. So, trust it.

My only concern is her safety, pleasure and satisfaction. She seems very content having these two additional solo encounters and very content to take a break before we head to Vegas in a couple weeks (might have to re-open the jar there! LOL).

So, I'll let her explain as she finds time. Seems to be in short supply these days as she is very busy with all things - two children, volunteer work and a new job!

Reflecting on Rach's Solo Encounter

2008-10-16T05:32:00.000-07:00

So now that Rach has posted her recollection of the evening, I have new appreciation for the event. We've recounted this with each other multiple times since and it is hot each and every time I hear her talk about it. She even called me Ken one night! LOL

I wanted to describe the emotions I went through on this evening and since. When Rach told me she was ready to do this, I was a bit stunned. To be honest, there was a slight tinge of hurt to the whole idea of her meeting someone without me. Up until that point, her only "solo" experiences had me occupied. You may recall that we vacationed a couple years back with some good friends of ours and that Rach had some fun alone. However, on that trip, we had not fully explored the idea of bringing in another man. I mean, we had fantasized about it but had not really taken that next step. Also, knowing he was a friend of mine made things somewhat easier. This was different.

I had never met Ken, knew nothing of him and was a bit concerned. I could tell from the lust in her voice that this was a different experience. Planned. It was also one that she had not been pursued as much as she was the pursuer (is that a word?) LOL. She wanted him and it hung hard in my chest for a bit that it seemed as if she didn't want me to meet him. I started having feelings of insecure jealousy.

Talking to her on the way in, I could also sense her nervousness. Now Rach can get the tingles. She can be excited. But when she gets nervous, I know, she really likes this guy. That, along with the idea that I would not be there so she could give the glancing reassurances, the touching of my hand or my leg to let me know she was still mine or the voice telling me she loved me - all of that...missing that...it was hard.

I tried to keep myself busy with the girls at home. At one point, I must admit, I was angry. Here I was with our two beautiful girls while their mother was out fucking another man. (I know that sounds so mean and hurtful but it is honest and I have to write it) Damn, why was I having such feelings of insecurity.

So, it did make me feel somewhat better that it was a relatively short period of time. It was as if she was in for a "quickie". That she simply wanted to experience this physical pleasure and then dismiss him, or rather dismiss herself, once she was through using him. When she called on the ride home, I was relieved that she was safe, relieved that she was not spending more time there and relieved that she would soon be coming home. It did hurt when I asked her about him and I could sense the uneasy openness as she described him. She used terms like "Greek God" and "the largest cockhead" which had me feeling...well, a bit inadequate. As we hung up, I felt myself shaking and didn't know what to do. So I went upstairs and noticed how my own cock was filling up. Damn, I remember thinking. Where is she? She should be home by now. I heard the garage door open and tried to look relaxed and cool...that was hard! LOL

The image I have of Rach walking in I can only described as "tustled". Her hair, while it appeared she had tried to brush, was still a mess. Her cheeks were still flush red and I remember thinking that she had just had an incredibly hard fuck. Still, the smile on her face, the look of questioning how I would react, the shaking legs as she walked toward me - all of it - had me thinking that I needed to reassure her that I was okay.

So here's the amazing part. When she reached me and I felt her embrace, it was. It was okay because I knew that she had come home to me. She didn't have to leave as quickly as she did. She certainly had a free pass for the evening when she left. I had made that as clear as I could possibly muster. But instead, she came home to fulfill the rest of her night with me.

It was so surreal smelling the scent - however slight the hint was - of another man. I wasn't turned on by it as much as I was turned on by her. She looked amazingly sexy, slightly slutty and completely mine. Wow. What a rush of emotions I went through that evening. To have her in my arms felt completely breath-taking.

As we made love, I became more comfortable asking her questions. When she answered, at first, I could tell she was reserving her words. She didn't want to hurt me, I could tell. But as our lovemaking grew in intensity, in pure raw energy and emotion, I continued to ask her and she opened up. She told me in no uncertain terms that she would love another round with this man. But at the same time, she quickly reassured me that it was I, not Ken, that made her completely happy.

Words can not describe the feelings I have for this amazing woman. She is everything I had ever hoped to find in a partner, in a lover, in a woman of equal. So as you read this Rach, know that there is nothing that stands between us. Nothing that we can't handle, emotionally and spiritually, together. I love you baby!

More Fun With Ken

2008-10-15T08:51:00.000-07:00

The girls are online looking for Halloween costumes. I have a few minutes to finish what I started with all of you patient readers. I know, I know, such a tease...and that is not the first time I have heard that. So let me get my mindset back to that wonderful night.

Knowing that I could please this man orally so quickly, that I had to pace myself, had me feeling very sexy. Ken placed one hand around my waist, the other on my breast, and looked me straight in the eyes while I pressed him slowly inside me. Internally, I was having slight second guesses, wondering if I was doing the right thing not having And here...physically. It was a much larger head than I was used to feeling. It seemed to have to stretch it's way inside of me. That is not to say that my love, my And, is not sizable. He is more than adequate...but this was so foreign...so big. Once the head was inside me, the rest slid in with ease.

I rode his cock slowly...quickening the pace as I went. My eyes closed and I felt the beginning hints of a powerful orgasm building in me and - not five strokes after that - I felt him stiffen and heard him groan. His large head was swelling even bigger inside me. I picked up the pace. I wanted this orgasm so badly! My groin became warm and waves of pleasure swept through me...I am sure I let out some sort of pleasurable noise. My muscles tightened around his cock as I continued to grind. Ken held my waist as I ever so slightly shook until my orgasm ended. It seemed to end abruptly. He carefully pulled out of me and went to the restroom...leaving me naked and exposed on his hotel bed.

I think this is where it became just a bit awkward. My mind instantly turned to And while my body was still getting over the amazing orgasm this man brought me. I got up out of the bed and began to dress. Ken asked if I could stay longer. I responded with a "no, I need to get home". He came over to me, kissed me lightly again and said he would like to meet another time. I squeezed him...getting one last feel of that body...and told him that his feeling was mutual. I left and called And as soon as I walked out of the lobby.

And's voice was off, just a bit. I think he was in disbelief of me being finished already. I detected a little worry, maybe some relief, all I know is that it was different and until I could see his face assuring me that all was well, I was feeling confused. The rest of the ride home was a mixture of feelings. I was excited to share this with And and, at the same time, just a bit nervous. I know he loves to hear about my flirting and encounters. I am always honest with him about them, but doing this completely on my own was uncharted territory. I was not completely sure what his reaction would be. My heart wanted a guarantee that everything was going to be the same - if not better than before - and my mind could not guarantee that.

I walked in the door. Right where I needed to be...my comfort zone. I am sure I looked like a wreck. I felt like an over-emotional, tired, but sexy, mess. I found And upstairs waiting for me. Walking in the doorway and seeing the look in his eyes, the passion, the longing, the pure love, made me realize how much I love him. We went over a few details of the evening. And asked me how I felt about going out on my own. I told him liberated and desirable. I told him how much I wanted him...to be in his arms. We made intense, passionate love right there....mixing in talk about how Ken pleased me. He wanted to know all the details of how I took Ken's cock all for myself. At that moment, I knew there was nothing in the world I wanted more than to be right where I was. After we put the girls to bed, we repeated this process many times over, and still do... reminiscing the emotions, the thoughts, and the feelings of that night. Being able to be so open with each other has brought us even closer than before.

I know this was a long tale and it is getting late, so I will wrap this up. Since meeting with Ken, I feel like I have opened yet another door to pleasure for both And and myself to walk through...together. I have been chatting with two more guys, both local. I have even met up with one for coffee. My libido is in overdrive. Since my evening of short-lived fun (all on my own), I have voiced to And many times my urges to see others and he has encouraged them. Just the talk about him letting me play with others has led to many nights of passion-filled sex. I have so much more to update you all on! :) Our lives have been full of discovery lately and I have been a bit bolder than ever. Because of this, we have come across new questions, new paths, new lessons....I will write more about this next time. It is now time for my beauty sleep!

Okay, so I came to check for any responses to our latest post this morning and realized I had not posted it yet...My mind must have been elsewhere last night.

Playing With Ken

2008-10-03T17:03:00.000-07:00

I know you all have been expecting this for some time now. I think I have been in a sort of writer's funk. I have so much I want to say. I think the reason I was waiting so long to post was because I was trying to put my evening into just the right words. After numerous conversations with And, our feelings, our thoughts, he convinced me to just write what I feel.

Making the phone call to tell And telling him that I was ready to take another lover by myself was not quite as easy as it may sound. My mind was racing and my heart was beating fast. I knew I wanted this but I was filled with pure nervous energy. The reassuring sound of And's voice told me that this was okay. We would be okay.

So there I was, getting ready to go see a gorgeous hunk of a man, all by myself. Checking to make sure my hair was just right, putting some scented lotion on my tanned legs, matching a gorgeous pair of earrings that my husband gave me, white gold and diamond, to the ivory sundress I decided to wear. Mmmm....I looked hot, if I don't say so myself! I was giddy! As And was watching me...helping me really...something about this scenario brought out an intense sexiness that I did not know I had inside. I am sure anyone, including my And, could see it in the way I was carrying myself as I walked out of our house and continued on to the Marriott.

As I was driving, I went through every possible scenario in my head...what to do if I was not comfortable...what outs I had. Utmost in my mind was the thought that I wanted to be safe and just simply enjoy myself. After talking to Ken a few times on the phone, and the numerous email and text messages we had exchanged, I felt comfortable...safe. I sat in the hotel parking lot for at least a minute before I picked up the phone and called my love. I needed to hear his voice just one more time before this really happened. I wanted to make sure he was still okay with this. His voice calmed me down. He told me that he loved me so much and to just have fun. I intended to do just that!

I walk into the hotel and called Ken from my cell. He said he would be right down. I walked to the bar and ordered a tonic with a lime. Even though my nerves were on edge, I wanted to be fully aware and alert. Breathe, I reminded myself. I sat in one of the soft leather chairs. Not two seconds later, what looked to be some sort of tall, tanned god, walked toward me...smiling. All I could think in my head was "Wow, he is even more handsome than his photos!" The way he was looking me up and down told me he was pleased. Without any awkwardness - other than him being about a foot taller than me - he reached in and hugged me close. I breathed in his scent - cool and clean - and felt his hard body against me. My heart skipped a beat right then.

So, after a very short session of small talk, about our spouses (yes, he is married), our lifestyles, we decided to head on up to his room on the 11th floor. I laughed because he already had some sultry music playing...I am sure this man does not get turned down often. :) We discussed a few more little mindless things like music and his career, just making noise to release the tension. As I was looking out of the window, from so high up, my mind wandered to what And might be doing right this second...was he okay? Was he worried? Was he upset? Was he turned on? I turned around to the touch of Ken slipping his long arms around me and kissing me very softly, slowly...

I unbuttoned his shirt and found myself looking at a man who definitely prided himself on his chest and arms. He was like a rock! I teased him with my fingertips...letting them roam all over his chest. His hands grabbed me close again for another kiss. In my head, I was thinking how different this kiss was than my And kisses me....nice, but definitely different! I found his belt, undid it and awkwardly slid his pants off of him. As I did, I found myself looking up to see an already half erect cock growing from beneath his boxer briefs. Knowing that I was the cause of his growing hardness was an immense turn on.

I pushed him to the bed, still with my dress on, and bent over to give him just the perfect cleavage shot. I smiled up at him as I began stroking his cock through his briefs. I quickly pulled them off of him and saw the most amazing thing. He had an enormous head! I told him how much I wanted his cock in my mouth. I am not sure what exactly his response was nor did I really care. I put my mouth on his head, and circled it with my tongue a few times. My god, I could barely get my mouth around the head of his cock at first. I definitely need to allow my mouth to get accustomed to it. Soon, I was bobbing my head up and down feverishly until he practically pulled me off his enormous mushroom....begging me to stop.

I knew what that meant. I gave him a second or two...kissing him and guiding his strong hands under my dress to show him how wet sucking his cock had made me. I think he was pleasantly surprised that I was not wearing any panties and from the moistness that was already evident. I began to suck his cock again...stopping every few strokes to keep him right on the edge.

I couldn't take it any longer. I wanted to feel this stranger's large head deep inside me. I pulled off my dress and asked him if he had any protection. He said yes and reached anxiously in the nightstand for it. I opened it and stretched the condom around his swollen head, guiding it down with my hands. They looked so small next to his swollen shaft. That vision right there, made me even more wet. I kissed him as I jumped on top of him...sitting with my back straight up and one leg on each side of his frame. This was it. I was about to take another man without my husband present. It felt so oddly....naughty yet...the excitement of the moment had my head spinning.

OK, forgive me. I know this is a bad place to stop but there is so much more I want to write...to express everything I felt. But right now, my oldest daughter is craving my assistance with her science fair project so I'll have to finish this another time...soon I promise!

More on Rach's Solo Night

2008-09-27T14:29:00.000-07:00

Many of you have sent us emails and comments about our last posting...Rach's night without me and I wanted to thank you. I know we've not posted as much lately but I do think that we are getting more interested in writing more frequently again and will do what we can to keep you posted on our relationship and encounters.

Most overwhelmingly, the comments were positive. Some of you commented that we've now "crossed over" to a hotwife and cuckold relationship. I disagree but you are entitled to your opinion. Perhaps I am in denial but the feelings of butterflies were 1) a bit of jealousy...that I wasn't there, 2) a bit of fear...for Rach's safety more than anything else, and 3) a bit of insecurity...would she feel an emotional connection or say things that might be uncomfortable for her with me present?

At no time did I feel, or did Rach cause feelings of humiliation. There is no "baby he fucked me better than you ever will" or any other talk of how inferior a lover I am. I guess when I think of cuckold, and perhaps it's just my misinterpretation of the term, it involves some demand of humiliation. Admittedly, these encounters are new experiences every time and there are some things that her men will have or do that I don't or do not do. But, to me, that is not a cuckold. That is simply my desire to see her reach the pinnacle of sexual experiences and allows us to grow in trust and openness to each other.

I can tell you that we've talked about this evening quite a bit and all is good with us. We are stronger than ever together and the evening only fueled the fires of our love for each other. Rach had a very wonderful, if a bit short, evening and came home with a smile on her face and a warm, and somewhat disheveled, body to boot! We've re-lived the night a few times already and it is incredibly intense, a turn-on and has increased our conversation about possible similar encounters in the future (the answer is: most likely, yes. She will see men without me from time to time). It does burn in my chest, just a bit, when she talks of her evening but she has been, and always will be, my love. She is simply so very open, honest and reassuring of our relationship.

She reassures me that I am her man and that he was just in fun. I accept that from her because I know when I hear her voice and see the look on her face that she is not holding anything back from me. We love each other so magnificently, it really blows my mind sometimes. I wish all could feel the same intensity I feel toward my gorgeous partner.

Rach has agreed to post very soon telling her version of the evenings events. Since she was there and I was not, I am sure her details will be much better than anything I can write. I know a number of you are anxiously awaiting that post but I promise you, it will be forthcoming soon.

Thanks again for all the email letters of support. It's nice to see that so many of our friends haven't abandoned us in our drought of postings.

Tonight Rach Went Solo

2008-09-19T23:41:00.000-07:00

So, I know we haven't written much lately. I've been traveling for business quite a lot lately and Rach has simply been too busy with the girls and trying to respond to many emails on AFF and Eroticy. I am actually posting three entries tonight because I just realized, looking back, that we had saved these as drafts and not posted them here. So, if you are just looking at our blog for the first time in a while, you might want to read the next two as well cause they are old news that is new to our postings! Hope that makes sense...LOL.

So, tonight Rach called me as I was headed home from work. She had been corresponding with a man that was coming to town on business. He and his wife are into the swinging lifestyle and his wife has given him permission to go outside and play on his own when he travels away from home. She told me he was in town, staying at the Marriott and that she was feeling quite naughty and wondered if I could be home soon. When I asked her what was up, she said, "He wants me to come over to his room and fuck. Is that okay?" Now, I have to tell you, my first reaction was in the pit of my gut. She wanted to meet someone she had only talked to on AFF and thru instant messenger. We had never met this man in person before - either together or her alone. I know they had exchanged numerous IM conversations, shared photos and had talked on the phone. She had also talked to his significant other and had confirmed, at least with a woman's voice, that she did approve of them meeting.

I too had seen photos of this guy, Ken. He was quite the attractive man, six pack abs, nice lean body, great hair, the works! I have to admit to a bit of jealousy and that is hard to get out of me...LOL. But there was something about this that told me Rach really wanted to do this. It was something she had not pursued before and I was both turned on and jealous at the same time (know that feeling guys? too well, right?) So, I tried to take a breath and told her, I'll be home in about an hour. Go get ready. I'll pick up some dinner for me and the girls and you can leave when I arrive.

When I arrived home, Rach was in our room putting on a very sexy, off the shoulders, shorter summer dress - plenty of eye candy both top and bottom. We talked for a bit about what the situation was. They were to meet in the hotel lobby and if all went well, she was going upstairs to have some fun. Wow. It hit me like a ton of bricks. I know we haven't discussed it here much but we've talked about the idea of her seeing other men while I am not present. I'd even encouraged it. But now that it was a reality, I wasn't so sure. We had not yet explored her going off alone. What if the guy was not all he said he was? What if he tried to hurt her or wanted something more than just sex? Still, I trust Rach. She's a very intelligent woman, senses when things aren't quite right (women are admittedly better at this, in my opinion) and I had to show her the trust that she deserved.

She took a couple fingers to her hair, took one last look in the mirror and gave me a passionate kiss as she left. Of course, that's not all she did. As she left, she could see the half hard massive flesh bulging from my pants and patted me saying, I'll be back in a bit for that!

It was hard watching her leave but I put on my best face as she closed the door, opened the garage door and I watched her leave in her car (did she just pull out of the driveway quickly because she was really excited?).

While I watched some television with the girls and we had dinner, my phone buzzed. It was Rach. Part of me was hoping she was calling to say, 'you know, I changed my mind, I am coming back for that bulge in your pants instead'. Instead, she told me she was just pulling up and she was nervous. She got out of the car and was still talking to me as I heard the doorman open the door and she thanked him. She said, "I gotta go, sweetie. I'll talk with you soon." I could only reply with a "have a good time and be safe, my dear."

After dinner, the three of us went out for some air - me for a walk while they circled me on their bikes. I couldn't keep my thoughts off what was going on. It was strange knowing that, right at that moment, my wife was playing with another man while I was here, away from her. It was stimulating and gut-wrenching at the same time.

About 45 minutes after she had first called, my phone rang. It was Rach on her way home. 'Already?" was all I could say. She said they talked in the bar for maybe ten minutes before he asked her if she wanted to go up to his room. She said she knew from the moment she saw him that yes, she wanted to go right then and there. When they arrived, they made a couple seconds of nervous talk before kissing passionately. It was in no time that she had him pushed down on the bed and started unbuckling his pants. She said she couldn't wait to have him in her mouth. She had seen photos of his cock but she told me, "Baby, the head of his cock was much bigger than I thought. I could hardly fit it in my mouth. The rest of his shaft was not nearly as big but he had a really big head and I just so loved putting it in my mouth." Apparently Rach was in control of this situation and Ken was allowing her to take the reigns.

She said he kept stopping her saying he was close to cumming. "It was much too hot", she said. "I could feel him tighten up and I knew he was close. I had to stop and start with him three times. By the third time, I was so wet." I knew when she left that she wasn't wearing panties so it was no surprise when she told me she reached for his hand and showed him exactly how wet she was. She said, "I asked him if he had protection. He said yes and reached for a condom which I put on him. It was really hard getting that huge head of his inside the condom. I thought it would break for sure". I could feel my heartbeat quicken at this comment. Clearly he had a much larger head than me and this was extremely pleasing to Rach. She went on, "And, it was just so big I wasn't sure I could get it inside me. But once I popped his head in, the rest just slid right down on me because I was so dripping wet." She said that the sex was a bit disappointing though because he only got in about ten strokes before she felt his huge head expand even bigger and could feel the cum running the length of his shaft and into the condom reservoir head. She said she was close as well and didn't let him stop even though she knew he had cum. "After all", she said, "I wanted to get mine and I wasn't going to let him stop until I did. She said she came really hard. "It was a really good one", she said. "One that I had not felt in a long time". That one little comment hurt just a bit. Had she not cum that hard with me recently?

So I asked her why she didn't stay around for a second round. I was sure he had just been nervous and would have lasted longer the second time. She said, she really had wanted to do so but also was aware that this being her first time without me, she didn't want to spend too much time away without checking back in. I told her that she could have done that from his room to which she giggled, almost school girl-like, and said, I am sure we'll have another opportunity. Right now, I am almost home and I am ready for a round two...with my true love. That comment there took away any feelings of doubt, any pains that she had just experienced something that I couldn't give her. That one comment made me acutely aware that I had made the right decision to let her go it alone.

I am sure it is not the last time she'll see Ken. He actually told her he travels here on business often and would love to see her again soon. She told him that she would really like that.

I made sure the girls were playing in their room when she came in. She had that 'just fucked' look - hair a bit disheveled, cheeks still flush. She came to me and kissed me so hard. She cooed a bit and told me she was still soaking wet from the experience. I took her hand and we quickly undressed and made passionate love for over an hour. We would intermittedly talk of her experience and she could tell the more detail she provided, the harder and longer my cock seemed to get. Each time she mentioned his huge head, I pictured her kegel-tight pussy being stretched as she rode him or her sweet, full lips wrapped around it while she gave him head. Butterflies ran huge when I saw in her eyes the passion as she relived it in her own head. But, I can say this. She sensed my butterflies. She grabbed my hand in hers, or looked me in the eyes lovingly and it seemed to take away all the quivers.

We got up and played with the girls before putting them to bed a few hours ago. Since then, I've relived it in my head a hundred times. How excited she was, how hot her phone call was just before she met her quickie lover, how she sounded, fulfilled and again excited on her drive and call on the way home. I did ask her if she wanted to see him again and she simply said, "definitely". I am hopeful that perhaps next time I will have the opportunity to meet and see this man in person but something tells me, she might want to keep this one for herself for a bit. Any lesser man might be concerned but I am not. For I know, Rach and I will always be together. She may have some evenings of fun with her new found Ken doll, but ultimately, I am the man with which she is sharing a lifetime of experiences.

Swinging or a hotwife?

2008-09-05T20:26:00.000-07:00

We received the following email recently from someone that had not obviously read all of our blog...(saddened by that). It appears that perhaps he also contacted Jay and Joy (if you want to read their answer it is over on their blog at http://joyshared2.blogspot.com/2008/07/questions-and-answers-july-08-edition.html

Still, I wanted to post the question here only because they were a very attractive couple from the photo. Thinking about all the wonderful couples out there and the questions you have, we didn't want to discount it and not answer.

The question was I was researching swinging on the net and am not sure if this is for us? How does it impact your relationship? My wife and I are considering trying this but are not sure yet. Would you mind telling me some good and bad things about it?

Our response was:

As you may have noticed reading our blog, we are not into "swinging". While some may classify it as that, we prefer to limit our activities to encounters that she has with other men and me. If you read our blog, you will also see that it has had a tremendously positive impact on our relationship.

The good thing is that she becomes sexually liberated. She feels sexy, thinks more sexy and certainly dresses and works out to remain sexy. Confidence in her appearance and her ability to turn men's heads is a real positive, she would say. For me, it is the ultimate in desires to see her engaged in intimate encounters with other men. She, to me, is the most beautiful woman in the whole world. What better porn to watch than your own spouse having mind blowing orgasms and in the throws of ecstasy. It has enhanced our relationship.

The bad? I can't think of any for us. Communication, openness, honesty is the key. If you don't have it, get it first. Other than that, you want to be very selective and get to know the people you play with outside the bedroom before inviting them into it! I can see where some, jumping head first, would not take the time to ensure that there is the proper amount of chemistry, build up and, ultimately, respect. Just as you would your wife, choose who you play with very carefully and feel completely comfortable before taking the leap.

Perhaps the best advice is take it slow. You are both attractive, from the photo we saw, so you'll have no problem attracting interested people. But, do they take it at your pace or they all about meeting and getting it going. Maybe you can go out and flirt with other couples, if you have an adult-oriented nightclub (notice I didn't say a strip club). Go where sexy people hang out. Have some fun. Leave her alone at the bar until someone comes along to hit on her (which wouldn't be long I dare say, given how good she looks!). Come back and strike up a conversation. Stop there. Go home, talk about how that felt. Enjoy the intimacy such revelation of thought can bring. If you are comfortable, take the next baby step forward. If not, retreat and talk things thru until you are!

Hope this helps!
And (and Rach)

Summer is quickly coming to an end

2008-08-22T12:35:00.000-07:00

I hate this time of year...really I do.

My girls, who get to spend all summer with me, are returning to school soon. And has been traveling a bit and it will only be getting worse in the coming weeks. I so miss him when he is away!

I've been trying to enjoy the last of summer vacation. It's hard when all the back-to-school shopping starts, orientation begins at the school, ice cream social to introduce the parents (mostly rich snobby ones at that!) back to the school year.

I've been keeping busy answering emails, looking over the web at other worthwhile sites on the issue of the hotwife lifestyle. And and I have talked quite a bit about taking things in a new direction. We still play with our couple of guys on occasion but we are looking to add someone new to the play. For this one, we've talked about perhaps me taking on a lover without And necessarily being present. We've talked about his travel schedule and how it is sometimes difficult to make schedules match up (especially with our married friend). So, we have decided to seek out someone that I can perhaps play with on my own.

I am quite sure it will happen but I am also sensitive to the situation. It is bound to bring in new discussion topics. Communication, which has always been great, will become an even more important part of everything since And will not physically be present in these encounters. I am also really curious how this will feel. Whether I'll feel differently not having And with me. I think that it is a further extension of what we've already established and it will be good, fun, interesting, exciting. Almost feel like I am dating all over again, trying to find someone simply for me to play with alone. Wow! I am getting wet just thinking about it. Since the girls and And are gone, I guess I'll go take a long, warm shower and picture the possibilities. Hmmm, this could get fun! Better get the rabbit out for this one! LOL

A few photos with our married MFM friend

2008-08-13T13:32:00.000-07:00

We hadn't posted a new photo for some time. To be honest, I haven't felt that sexy lately and didn't really want to post anything after some of the comments we received after I posted And's photo. Why is it that some people have to say such mean things to us?

So after a lot of debate on whether to ever post photos again (and And's insistent calls for me to do so) here are a few photos And recently took with our married friend while we had some fun together. I know they aren't very clear but my editing skills leave a lot to be desired and I still get nervous every time I post photos. Plus, I am really sure I want to keep our married friend's identity really secret...LOL

Doesn't he have just the most gorgeous ass?

Answer to a not so recent hotwife comment

2008-07-31T20:08:00.000-07:00

I just saw this comment from a few posts back. Not sure how I missed it but rather than post the comment in response to the comment, I thought it was much more appropriate to put it up here. Here is the original comment:

I personally find your writings very enlightening. My husband and I are dabbling a bit in the alternative lifestyle and his fantasy is not unsimilar to what the two of you have going. There is a slight difference, however - he wants me to be with exclusively black men.

So far, we have not had MFM as hubby prefers to video or take pictures of the encounter. In addition, there have been a few occassions where I have agreed to go off and play (at hubby's insistence) and take pictures and come back home and tell him all about it.

Obviously by now you can tell that I am the wife writing to you and I do have a question for you. My husband seems to focus a lot more on this than I do and most encounters are at his (for lack of a better word) nagging. I do enjoy each encounter, however most likely would not have considered this on my own. We have been married for 19 years and I am 9 years younger than hubby. So tell me, is this a big part of both your lives, a take it or leave it situation, or does one of you enjoy the lifestyle more than the other?

First, thank you Sexy wife in Ga. I have enjoyed reading your blog and I am going to add it to our list of preferred reading right after I get done with this response!

At first, I will freely admit that it was more his fantasy than mine. As you may have read in our earlier writings, I initially thought he wanted this of me so he'd have an excuse to have another woman. However, as we talked about it more, I realized that he really - exclusively - wanted this because it was his fantasy to see me with another man. It was, I think, a combination of him seeing me and having me experience something that would expand our sexual experiences together.

As we moved closer from fantasy to reality, I think it quickly became something we both really were looking forward to experiencing. I was nervous, for sure, and I did have doubts and "pulled back" at times. But still, the fantasy grew in me as well. We never had the stereotypical thoughts of a "black stud" or the thoughts of a cuckhold. Rather, we saw it as someone like us, white (I suppose - although not consciously), educated, upper-middle, surburban, fit, good-looking. It was a fantasy that grew in me the more we played with the idea in public and in private.

I remember wondering what it would be like to have another man kiss me, touch me and have sex with while And watched or participated. It became a really hot thought to have two men fully focused on me. That thought alone was good for quite a number of solo sessions with my toys...LOL...and many sexy times during our intimate evenings together.

Now that we've shared that experience a number of times, albeit with only two men (not at the same time! LOL) to date, it has become something that we truly share together. I can't stress enough the idea that you have to find someone that you are comfortable with and that makes you feel comfortable. Both our lovers are just that, in different ways for sure, but they are very nice men, good-looking, respectful of our relationship and understand their role.

Is it a BIG part of our lives? No, it is not the biggest part. The part that we share - just the two of us - or even more so, our family is the biggest part of our lives. Is is something that without we would be empty? Far from it. I am sure we would have a happy marriage regardless of this play. But, I can say, it certain it makes the hotter times even hotter. It's something I think that, with the proper communication, trust and respect and love of your husband, you will certainly come to enjoy and desire as much, if not more, than he.

Recent email from an inspired, hotwife seeking man

2008-07-29T18:56:00.000-07:00

I received what I thought was a very thoughtful response via email recently. I wanted to post it here, while removing anything that might be seen as identifying the man that sent this to us as it was so moving to know how we've impacted someone. I appreciate these letters so much because, for so long now, we've put our heart and soul into this blog. It's nice to know it has had an impact on some of you. Here is the response that I so loved:

I found your blog by mere chance while I was surfing from one site to another. I started to read a few words not really paying much attention. As I moved on through your entries, I became more and more attracted to the wonderful way of you were telling your story. I came to really appreciate the way you wrote with such honesty, feelings, awesome sincerity.

I decided to start from your beginning and I cannot go one day without reading some of your entries ( I am now at March 2007). As I was reading them, I felt like I have known you for a long time as best friends. My congratulations to you, my respect and my admiration are yours. I can see that you have a fantastic relationship. It is really wonderful that you have such an open and honest relationship.

I have been happily married for more than 2o years and I have a wonderful family and wife. I have recently started to share some of my fantasies with my wife. Bit-by-bit, our discussions have grown deeper.

You have definitely inspired me to start talking about the possibility of a hotwife lifestyle with my wife. In fact, thinking about your experience and the growth in your relationship, I am now realizing that I am be more interested in an MFM experience, or my wife dating other men, than me having any sexual relationship with another woman (or an FMF experience). Before reading your blog, I would have thought it weird to have such thoughts but, thanks to you, I now know it is not. Your way of telling it is so sweet, open, sincere and exciting!! I am always turned on when I read your stories. Thank you so much for teaching me and, certainly, many couples so many things about sex and an open and honest couple's relationship.

I hope to be brave enough in the near future to talk about your blog to my wife and read it with her. I wish you both all the best and simply wanted to express my great admiration for you both.

Still out here, just busy

2008-07-22T23:22:00.000-07:00

We haven't posted nearly as much this summer as we'd like but I wanted to let you know that we are still out here and we are still trying to reply to the many emails we receive from couples and singles in a relationship interested in the idea of introducing another man into their physical relationship.

We've heard from a number of you that have been inspired by our journey thus far. We have heard from more than a few of you that have wanted to share this idea with their spouse and have summoned up the courage to do so through our blog - either sending the link to them in an email and telling them to read (I like this idea) or sharing it with them while surfing the web together (even better!) I do say our journey thus far because it continues each and every day. If it didn't we'd have to be dead! LOL

We have been extremely busy this summer enjoying our family life. And continues to travel for his work so very much but he's enjoying what he does for a living and that means a lot to me. He also provides so well for us and allows us many creature comforts and for that we are extremely blessed and grateful.

I continue to respond to emails and check our ads occasionally for any new and interesting "prospects". We have had some infrequent play time fun with our two friends and met a couple other interesting men in a casual, public setting. For now, it is sincerely satisfying. I am sure we'll find new journeys to take us to new and interesting places but at this point, we are both content with the friends we've made and the men we've introduced into our relationship. Really, they've become friends of sorts - kept at a safe distance, mind you - and we really enjoy sharing conversation as much as the adult fun we have with them. Both our current male "thirds" are very genuine, sincere, intelligent guys and for that I appreciate where we are with them. Will they ever become more? No. And and me have a relationship stronger than ever and they've simply enhanced all that we have. They understand and respect their "role" and seem to also be content with what we have and what we will not have.

So, we'll keep posting and perhaps share some of our fun times on occasion. Summer is quickly coming toward the school year. As the girls get back to it, and I find more time, I am sure we will write more. For now, just know we are still alive, still together and still experiencing all our fantasies and making realities out of this path we've chosen.

A former Porn Star contacts us.....or so he says he is

2008-06-28T14:35:00.000-07:00

Recently, we received a response on our Adult Friendfinder profile from a guy that claims he was in the porn industry until recently and was wondering if we'd like a Screw My Wife experience.

Now, I am not sure the guy is for real but his testimonials certainly speak to his credentials. Many women and couples have experienced his "talents" previously and posted a response on his profile indicating that he is indeed who he says he is. I am not familiar enough with the porn industry (and certainly haven't paid attention to the names of the male uhmmm actors) to know if he really was a known star but it was certainly intriguing.

We hear from time to time from other couples that are looking for a certain "experience". Whether it be a surprise for the wife (not something we recommend without getting her explicit consent LOL), a certain ethnicity (mainly the stereotypical black 'stud') or a certain act (double penetration comes to mind as one example) or lifestyle (the my dick is small and I want to be a slave to my wife dominated home). While we are certainly not judging anyone or opposed to anything that they are seeking, (it's still a fairly free country after all) we just aren't into these stereotypes or, I guess you could call them, fetishes.

We appreciate the passion of a MFM threesome, have experimented with various, well, variations...LOL...of a MFM threesome (namely, me watching her, videotaping or photographing them, the full participation of all three people at the same time), yet we haven't felt the desire for these, I guess I would say, alternative fantasies. We have friends of ethnicity, don't buy into the stereotypes of the cuckold lifestyle and don't really wish the experience the "professional" porn star. We prefer real people with real manners, respectful of our relationship and interested in some pure fun for the evening with a bit of friendship thrown in for good measure. We seek an intelligent, good-looking, friendly guy. His member doesn't have to be extra huge, he doesn't have to be of a specific race and he certainly isn't going to get anywhere putting down her man. He needs to be comfortable around a husband and wife wanting to have a little fun with their relationship yet respectful of their primary position with each other.

I am sure some reading this will feel we are putting down these different desires, fantasies or as I said, fetishes. On the contrary. We think it only adds to the discussion, perspectives and experiences. It's just not something either of us has expressed a desire to fulfill. We like the idea of the Screw My Wife experience. As we said, we own many of the DVDs in this series (although the earlier versions seem more real, and thus more desireable to us). To each his own. But Mr. Professional Porn Star, if you are one of our readers, we won't be messaging you back. We have enough sense to know what we wish to experience and what we wish to keep fantasy. To be frank, we think the many, many testimonials just, well, kind make us feel a bit creeped out. We prefer the real guys that are experienced but not TOO experienced....LOL.

We've been away for a month? Time flies!

2008-06-21T17:19:00.000-07:00

I was just thinking about our blog wondering if we were still having much input and I see that, indeed, the number of people checking in is really down. I guess I can't blame anyone, we didn't realize until just now that it's almost been a month since we last wrote anything! LOL

I've been traveling quite a bit for work which has really limited the opportunity for our play. I get home from a flight on Friday, have a couple days with Rach and the girls, and then I am back on the road. It seems like the summer is already upon us and we haven't even had many chances to get together with friends and family - let alone our married or single friend.

Rach, to her credit has been trying to stay up with emails and the like but since we haven't played any in the past few weeks, hasn't felt the desire to update on nothing to update..LOL She has been on AFF and Eroticy every few days, looking through the emails we get and even sending a few herself to interesting men. I've also given her the green light that, if she sees someone she likes to meet them while I am gone, but she hasn't reached that point with anyone new.

We did have an evening with our married friend again. He was quite the gentleman, as he always is, and brings a level of experience and knowing to our experiences. He seems so aware of what it is we want and where we are going with the evenings activities. Hell, he is so much of a good guy, he and I have talked about playing golf, meeting for a drink or taking in a game. We haven't had that opportunity yet but it certainly seems likely that we will when we have more time. After all, if his wife, who doesn't seem too concerned with him (they've grown apart and he is basically in a sexless relationship and stays for the kids) thinks he is just out with a friend, he will probably have good cover for when we are just hanging out at the house - HANGING out that is...LOL.

Other than that, life has been pretty routine. Rach and the girls are enjoying summer break together, she's doing some painting and landscape work around the house and just enjoying the simple things in life. She did tell me she lost five pounds, put some lighter highlights in her hair and, believe it or not, she looks more gorgeous than ever!

My travel has not made things any easier for us but we are scheduled for a family vacation the week of the 4th which should, hopefully, allow us to spend some time together again. Sometimes the travel is indeed hard but I can say this, it certainly makes the times we are together more sweet. Sex, just the two of us, seems almost new and increasingly interesting.

Occasionally, we'll pull in some talk of the "other guy" but more times than not lately, it's been about just us. This too is a good thing. Not that we won't be experiencing a third and perhaps beyond again and again but that we can sometimes pull back and re-experience the pure joy of our primary sexual relationship.

It is so good just to sit on a Saturday evening, drink a cocktail and listen to music together. It makes me love her all the more that we can sit peacefully together and just enjoy the company. It also makes me more sure of those times when we think about adding another. That communication, that primary trust and understanding of each other leaves no doubt that when she is enjoying the powerful thrust of another cock, that it is just pure sexual fun and that, after we are thru with our fun, we will be in each others arms again and forever.

The second M's perspective in an MFM

2008-05-26T13:39:00.000-07:00

We've compiled a list of reasons guys consider being part of an MFM encounter from the emails we've received. Thank you to all that responded. We thought the list would be insightful to couples that wonder what might be in the minds of some of these guys. Perhaps it will ease some of the tension you might be feeling about seeking out another man for your sacred bonds. Perhaps knowing what they might be thinking will help to know that not all these single (or married) guys are out there trying to corner your wife and steal her away from you. Most of the quality ones we've heard from can be summed up in one of the following categories.

Not wanting any commitments: A guy may not want to enter into a committed relationship with a woman for various reasons - even while having the obvious desires of sex. He may a) be in a relationship that he has little or no intention of leaving but not currently having the sex he desires within it; b) not yet over the loss of a previous relationship with a woman or; perhaps, c) has some personal goals that may be slowing or stopping him from entering into a committed relationship at this time. Yet he still wants some sexual fun. What better way than to seek out a committed couple that will have little interest in anything more expected of him than some fun?

Seeking Someone That Shares His Interests: He may desire to enter into a committed relationship with a woman but he is looking for a woman that has similar views, interests, and perspectives. Some guys have interests such as non-monogamy that are not practiced by the majority of society (at least, in an open and honest way). As one email male (huh?) put it "personally, I have been waiting for a woman that shares my interest. In the mean time, I still desire sex. So, no-strings-attached sex still fits the bill - even though I some day desire an emotional commitment with the right woman. What better way to gain insight into finding it than to be with a couple that already has found it?"

Pure and Simple. NSA: Sure many of these solo men can find this type of sex with other solo women. But it is tough to accomplish NSA sex with most because single women are still generally looking for Mister Right. Head games between singles occur and this is often not worth the trouble in many a man's mind. It is easier to find "NSA" sex with a woman that is already in a committed relationship. Attached women are less interested in playing games, and they certainly aren't desiring something more than some plain ole adult fun with the NSA male lover.

Less Risk of Disease: Happily married women that are faithful and honest, but openly enjoy consensual non-monogamy, are perceived as less likely to have STDs than a single woman who is non-monogamous and playing the field. Married women are just viewed as safer sexual partners. Sure condoms are protection. But there are still some things out there you can catch! Married, mostly monogamous, women are safer.

Social Taboos: Breaking the social taboo that married women should not enjoy sex with "another man" is exciting. Sex with a married woman is adventurous. Spontaneous, uncomplicated sex, as opposed to "love making" may have been lacking for a guy in his previous sexual experiences. In most cases, married women are looking for a bit of adventure and are more open about what they want in a sexual experience. After all, it is all about her, right?

Being the Man of Fantasy: Feeling as if you are a guy that is "the alpha male" or "fantasy material" is also very satisfying. While possibly an overstatement, guys imagine that women fantasize about threesomes or some "other man". Most every woman that experiments with a threesome, or with another man, has first fantasized about it many, many times. Being the guy that brings that reality to her can be quite the ego boost.

For the Enjoyment of Group Sex: This is related to Social Taboos, in the way that it is also fun to break the taboo of group sex. But a threesome has a thrill all its own. While it probably will not satisfy all a second man's sexual appetite, group sex is something that most people fantasize about or desire to include in their lifetime sexual experience.

Voyeurism and Exhibitionism: Some people receive great sexual satisfaction from watching or being watched. For others, this is a part of group sex that they may not have even considered. But being watched or watching another is something you don't get unless you are in a group setting (or publicly adventurous!). Breaking down that barrier of watching another man have sex with the same woman that you are can be a rush. Being watched, while scary for some, is exactly what drives others to their peak performance. As one guy put it, "You are, in a way, on a stage playing a leading role. While some might have stage fright, I love the thrill of performing for another."

The Woman of Lust: Some men are attracted to women with strong and healthy sex drives. Most men, whether they admit it or not, prefer lusty women over women that appear cold and not as sexual. This is not only for their own pleasure - in hopes of getting more sex - but it can literally be an admiration of sexually adventurous women. What better way to find an adventurous woman than seek out one that has already come to the understanding of a threesome and all it involves? Surely, there is a greater chance she will be more adventurous than a single girl that might come with all sorts of social acceptance hang-ups.

A More Satisfying Experience: Many women are attractive enough that most men will desire sex with them - even if, or perhaps even more so when, emotional connections are restricted. The woman may be physically attractive, be incredibly intelligent, or have a wonderful personality, but, typically, she is most desirable when a combination of these traits are present. So, even if a man knows without question that he will not form a relationship with her, he still feels that sex with her will be a satisfying experience. A women in a committed relationship just seems to get past the single-mindedness that she has to only be good-looking, intelligent or fun and combines these to be the total woman and more attractive in the overall.

So we hope this list explains some of the inner workings of the male mind that has an interest in being a third in an MFM encounter. Obviously, we aren't the experts on this and it isn't all encompassing but it really comes from a list we've compiled over the two plus years since we actively pursued other men in our fun. Perhaps some single guys out there will read this and it will make some sense to them. After all, there are many candidates out there but some times, quality men are lacking. Just take a look on one of the many sex connection websites. No, we aren't talking about cock size or egos but quality men that get "it". Maybe we'll inspire some of them to step out and seek out couples looking for fun. After all, you can never have too many candidates!

Which also has me thinking about our next hot topic...guys, what you should do if you are considering seeking out a couple. We'll work on that for perhaps the next month or so based on our experiences and what we've heard from other couples we've corresponded with over the past months and years and share it with you. Maybe, just maybe, we can help you learn a thing or two about what a couple seeks in a second man for their encounter.

Finally - a photo of And

2008-05-23T17:17:00.000-07:00

So I said some time back that I was going to post a photo of And. I didn't do it then because I thought that most of our readers were male. The deal was that if we had more couples than single guys reading our blog, I'd post a photo showing you a bit of him. Well, I bent the rules a bit and told And that the bet was couples AND single women or women couples. My real bet was that there were as many women readers as men. So, okay, I still lost. I guess in the end, And was right. There are more men interested in reading about this life choice versus single women and couples combined.

But that really wasn't the surprise. After I showed And the new photos that I had posted at Eroticy.com I told him that I felt like we should put a photo of him on the site as well. I thought it was only fair since he has been so desirous of putting my photos on here. Plus, I think you all should see at least something of the most wonderful man in the whole world - getting his favorite treat, don't you?

So after two years of blogging, here is your first glance at my man. My only problem with this is that it isn't the most flattering photo of me. Admittedly, I look....gawd. This photo was the result of finally having a time with our married friend (our photographer and third for the time...LOL) I hope you enjoy him at least! LOL Isn't he sexy?

Where Have We Been? Well, having fun with a Married Guy!

2008-05-08T21:46:00.000-07:00

It's been almost a month since our last post and boy, do we feel guilty. Okay, not really...LOL.

The more we've experienced, the less we've found time to keep up with what has happened. It's funny really, after we've broken through some taboo barriers, we really feel free and not as inclined to necessarily write about them. It also seems we've been viewed less, commented on less frequently and spammed more! Perhaps now that we are officially a hotwife couple, people are less inclined to read our story. In any case, I know we'll get back on the blog train and address some of these issues, but here is a recap of what we've been up to in the past few weeks.

We've seen our married friend a couple times now and had some great, hot fun. It is interesting to me as I know Rach really struggled with the idea that he was married and his spouse didn't know. However, I think we both understand his situation a lot better now and as long as he is comfortable with what he is doing, we don't have any hang ups about it. In many ways, it is more comforting to know that he is married.

First, he isn't someone that is going to try to step in or on our relationship. It is simply sexual fun to him (and us) and there is no cause for alarm that he'll want more. I started to get the feeling that Jon, bless his heart, wanted a bit more of Rach's time than we wanted. He'd call her to see what was up. He'd make comments about getting together and seemed anxious for our next liason. It wasn't to the point of discomfort but did raise our guard just a bit.

Secondly, he is a bit older and, how do we say this politely without making him sound old, experienced? self-aware? wiser? (ooh that last one always sounds old doesn't it...LOL). He is only a few years older. Our age really, for all intents and purposes but he does "get it". The single guys we've been attracted to (no, I am straight. When I say attracted, I mean intrigued by their looks and profile) are typically a bit younger than us. Many times, we start to have conversations with them and the age difference, even if it is only a few years, starts to really become obvious. Men, me being one of them, are less mature for their age than women. Guys in their 20's, while having great bodies a lot of the time, just don't seem to "get it". They tend to come off as smart asses a lot more. Cocky, perhaps is a good word. Honestly, I think if we look for another single guy, he might be well into his 30's.

Third, I am beginning to wonder if married guys have a better understanding of pleasuring a woman. I mean, they get to intimately know a woman's body - being married to one....LOL...and seem to have an idea of how to please a woman. The single men we've talked to seem more into themselves and less into making Rach the center of attention. Not that we've gone down this path too far with most of them but it just seems that they are more self-centered and when that becomes obvious (and sometimes when it starts to show and we both sense it) they don't get any further. The married guys we've talked with seem more patient and more willing to let this happen on our schedule.

This is not to say that we don't see some draw backs to married guys. One is the obvious, what if he is caught. But I think weeding through some of these to understand that perhaps she knows on some level and has come to accept it, that the guy would own up to it and not include us in his drama and learning more about the situation he is in and even empathisizing on some level, has made us comfortable with this.

The other draw back is that he isn't always as free. This is where the single guys, well Jon this far, has an advantage. He has no one to worry about scheduling around and having fun with an attached guy has posed a small issue thus far. Nothing too dramatic with the proper planning and advanced notice. In fact, if you've read our blog for some time (and that number seems to be dropping daily...LOL) you will see that we actually began talking with him over six months ago. Part of the reason we took so long is to get over our own concerns but the other part was ensuring that he had some free time to play.

Anyway, he is a great guy. I was more drawn to Jon having some fun with us for some time but as time went on, this guy seemed to really get it. To be honest, I am not sure that he wouldn't have been better for the first one (Jon, if you are reading this, that's not to say you aren't a great guy and weren't a great first for us!) As I said, he just seems to get it better.

Other than that what have we been up to? Well, we went to Vegas, visited a strip club, had some fun with a stripper after she was done for the night (just some playful fun at another club between Rach and her really) and had a great time with just the two of us. We've also met a couple new guys for drinks. No play with them yet but perhaps something in the works with one shortly. Oh, and yes, they are both married as well.

A recent photo

2008-04-17T13:12:00.000-07:00

I know I haven't posted anything for awhile but I was just looking over our profile on AFF, checking out some of the guys on line and messages we've received and was feeling a bit frisky. So, after I pleasured myself just a bit...lol...I decided in the afterglow that I wanted to post a recent photo.

By the way fellas, contacting us by email and coming up with a two sentence email asking to meet up is doing nothing for you. If you do think you are interested, get on one of the online services, create an interesting profile and add some photos (preferably one including some face and body and not "the goods"). Then, when you send us a message, don't work so little to say, 'hey, checking your out. You look fuckable. Let's meet.' or something as lame.

Come up with something original, sincere and attractive! K enough of my vent. It's just that And was wading out the losers and hasn't been on as much. It seems our messages on both our services are clogged with dumb asses that send messages like that (usually with an assumed fake photo of a large cock not belonging to them).

We are planning to FINALLY meet our married man that we've been talking to since before Christmas this weekend. His wife is out of town visiting family and we are planning to meet for dinner. If you remember, he was the one that we considered before we finally settled on Jon for our first encounter. We have continued talking but I haven't seen him in some time. I am not sure that we'll be having any naked fun but we'll be sure to let you know how that date goes! Just thinking about it brings back the same feelings of nervousness and excitement that I felt about our first time meeting Jon.

Lie to Me touches on hotwifery, Other movies?

2008-04-06T16:43:00.000-07:00

Last night we saw an interesting movie that touched on the idea of a hotwife/cuckold relationship - if ever so gently. It is called Lie to Me. If you haven't seen it, we thought it was quite the emotional, psychological interest in sex that we were looking for in a Saturday night. At one point, after breaking up, the female lead narrates" I want him to see me with five cocks around me. One in my mouth, another in my cunt. I want him to feel what I am doing..." It touched on the idea that having other men would draw her man closer to her, making him want her all the more. Something we found to be an interesting take on the psyche of a sexual woman seeking her lover's affection.

A couple years ago, we put a challenge out. We have always been interested in movies that relate to the subject matter of the inner mind of a couple looking at joining the hotwife life.

We started looking when we began to explore the topic of this fantasy. We found the movies in the Screw My Wife series and really began to collect many of these titles. (By the way, if you're looking for these - which are much more explicit than anything mainstream, you'll find that the original ones were much more authentic than the later ones which were more porn stars than real couples.)

Still, we've been unable to find mainstream movies that deal with hot wives. When it comes to movies, a film with dialect and a careful plot can put you both in a rather erotic mood to discuss the hot wife fantasy. So, we are looking for a somewhat mainstream movie that fits into the hotwife theme.

As we've said before, a favorite for us was Eyes Wide Shut. It was a great movie that put us in the mood to talk about our fantasies. My wife first admitted there was a man that she would let fuck her after watching this movie. We also had some incredible sex after we watched the movie and it really allowed us to talk more explicitly about the Hotwife fantasy.

So, are there any movies that have inspired you or that you think would be good viewing for others wanting to discuss the fantasy with their partners? Perhaps we'll have to go foreign (Lie to Me is a Canadian release) to find a title that really explores this honestly. Any suggestions?

Seven deadly sins

2008-04-02T21:41:00.000-07:00

I recently found yet another quiz that tests your fate...LOL. It's called the Seven Deadly Sins quiz and it was quite interesting so I thought we should post it here.

Of course, it comes as no surprise to me or anyone reading that Lust is what has done my soul in.

Your sin has been measured. You have committed many sins, but Lust is the mortal sin that has done you in. Just below, discover your full sinful breakdown and learn what it is about you that codemns you to hell.

Interestingly, I also ranked high on Greed and Gluttony. Apparently I need to get off my ass and give more to Charities (which I do think we already support...perhaps it was that expensive pair of jeans or my BMW that did me in...hmm

Greed:	High
Gluttony:	High
Wrath:	Low
Sloth:	Low
Envy:	Medium
Lust:	Very High
Pride:	Medium

Take the Seven Deadly Sins Quiz

A letter from a husband

2008-03-27T13:57:00.000-07:00

We recently received a letter that I thought I'd post, anonymously, to our blog before we head out to spring break. Occasionally, I think I write a pretty good answer so I wanted to post what I wrote this wannabee husband of a hotwife:

His email went something like this:

Hi Rach and And,

I discovered your wonderful blog last week. Before this, I didn't know the difference between a hotwife lover and cuckold. For 3 years, I've harbored the hotwife fantasy, not knowing why I loved it so much.

I've started reading your blog from the beginning, really getting aroused imagining that it was my wife who was sharing a dance (and some tongue) with some young 20-something.

Rach, I must say you have a super bod. If my wife had a chest like yours, I would have to hole away the kids with the grandparents for a few days while I made love to her chest repeatedly. As for And, I hope to be in your shoes by the end of the year - that is, to have a hotwife who will fulfill my fantasies.

Great job on the blog. I would want to add my comments but I can only view your blog (via cutting and pasting to my email) at work. My wife just doesn't understand why or how I can see her with other men. And of course, your blog is a bit risque for my workplace.

Here is my response (which I was quite proud of since I've had writer's block the past few weeks! LOL)

Thank you for your message and I do apologize for taking so long to get back to you. We do get quite a bit of mail!

I was, like your wife, not understanding of what And wanted. I always questioned whether he wasn't wanting to have his own affair or perhaps open our marriage to other couples, groups or some sort of "lifestyle". It is only through constant, consistent communication that I was able to more fully understand his fantasy. It was also only when we began to "experiment" with the idea that I came to fully grasp that it was nothing more than what it was.

Women, I am sure you understand, are built differently than you men. For men, it is easier to separate love and sex. For most women, it is not such an easy thing to do. Important to your overall development of this fantasy is making her feel loved, respected and wanted. I think it is important from the standpoint that we are afraid that if we do harbor fantasies of having another man, that somehow, you'll look differently at us. That you'll say, see, you fucked another man, so what's wrong with me fucking another woman.

And has shown no desire to do so and I think it is important that you understand what your real desire is. For him, I've come to realize, it is more about seeing me as a sexual creature, opening my thinking and allowing me to more fully appreciate sex. I think it is important for you to present these same things if you are ever going to be successful in your quest for a hotwife...lol

Please do read more entries from our blog and you'll understand. You'll find many where we questioned and even stepped back from things. It was a long process, years really, and I don't think it is something you want to rush. After all, the trip is sometimes just as fun as getting there! Just because we've experienced this, twice now, doesn't mean that our journey is over. In fact, I can attest that having gained confidence in myself and in And's commitment to our relationship, the fun has just begun!

More reasons from a lover of wives

2008-03-24T12:14:00.000-07:00

A couple weeks ago, we started to tell you one reader's perspective on what it is that motivates him to seek women of other men. We wanted to continue that discussion in hopes that other men might tell us what they most seek. Of course, we want reasons that are beyond the typical "I wanted to experience sex purely for the pleasure of it." or "To experience sex without having a deep commitment to the woman." These reasons to us are pretty superficial and don't really go beyond the pure lustful and physical needs. Here then are the remaining reasons our friend gave us.

I wish to be the subject of women's fantasies. This is something I realized early on after the first few meetings with my very first couple. I realized that it feels extremely uplifting to be the person that a woman fantasizes about. To be fantasy material is rare and it boosts my ego. It is simply very gratifying to know that a woman has fantasies about me. I enjoy feeling that I am sexually lusted. I just don't imagine a woman always feeling that way about her husband all the time. Sometimes, it is natural, that she lust after some other guy to which she does not have daily access. It is amazingly satisfying to be the very thought of fantasy material.

Think about it...on any of the adult personal sites like AFF, the most common people sought out are bisexual women, or couples with a bi-curious female. These are society's idea of the most common fantasy. But less popular, at least based on the number of posted ads, is the single male for the wife to experience. While I may only have an average endowment, I have other talents that fit the fantasy. I consider myself above average-looking, I am younger than most husbands and I am there purely for the pleasure of the wife. Feeling as though I was fantasy material in a somewhat uncommon fantasy feels wonderful. Feeling lusted after makes sex with a hotwife incredibly hot. What guy wouldn't feed off, and want to fulfill the desires of, this fantasy role.

I am not one that has ever been the type to always chase new pussy or post notches in the bedpost. But, that said, every woman is different. Sex with a new woman is likely to be unique in some way when compared to sex with a previous woman. So, experiencing sex with a new woman, involving a new couple, is very intriguing. It is a journey to be enjoyed. This is specially true if I am able to experience sex with the woman on more than one occasion.

Finally, I am a bit of a rebel. Not in some criminal sort of way but I am someone that likes to run counter to mainstream culture. I like to explore. I believe that the norms of our culture are not always the best journey (or the most accurate portrayal of a fulfilled life). I like to live out my own beliefs regardless of whether the majority of culture agrees with me. I don't do it only to be rebellious but I do feel a certain liberty in going my own way...in finding my own path...and in being a pioneer of sexual liberation.

That's a short and less-than-perfect way of explaining some of my perspectives.

In closing, I can say that a peom that is in sink with many times/themes in my life is Rebert E. Frost's peom, The Road Less Travelled. ............and that has made all the difference!

80% of men fantasize about a hotwife

2008-03-18T13:09:00.000-07:00

Can this statistic be right? According to some 'experts' in the field as many as 80% of husbands fantasize about seeing or hearing about their wife having sex with another man.

Many of the fantasies contain some husbandly involvement - perhaps helping her dress for her night out with the girls, her date night, or rendevous. Most fantasies involve the wife telling the husband about her night out, the men with whom she flirted, from which she received phone numbers or with whom she danced. If she had a sexual encounter, the husband wants to hear the details. This excites him as it does her. In other fantasies, the husband may want greater involvement. Perhaps he wants to watch her as she moves about a bar catching men's eyes. He wants to watch her grind with her newfound interest on the dance floor before returning home to await her recollection of the night's events. Other men want even more involvement in the sexual encounters. They want to watch as their wife is kissed, touched and penetrated by another man. They may even want to join in - which goes beyond a simple hotwife and involves a MFM three way fantasy. The cuckhold husband may even go further in wanting to feel humiliated by his wife by having her tell him of his shortcomings and pathetic state.

Many women are initially startled or uncomfortable with this fantasy. With the knowledge that her husband wants her to flirt, make out or have sex with another man can come feelings of doubt about his love for her. She may feel an obligation to become a hotwife to satisfy his fantasy. While, intitially, it may not be her fantasy, many wives find out how excited they become once they experience the freedom and attention of men other than their husband. The experience often gives women a higher sense of self and the feelings of attractiveness may lead to further exploration.

Communication, trust and a marriage on a solid foundation are requisites if you are thinking about or discussing a hotwife relationship. It may take years of talking about it before any action is taken. It may take only a few conversations. You may find that it is simply a fantasy best left as that and not something you want to act on - at least now. Whatever your perspective, we'd love to hear your questions, your experiences or just your two cents on the subject.

Intrigued with the Erotic Personalities responses

2008-03-17T14:18:00.000-07:00

Today, I am sitting at the airport awaiting a delayed flight that will take me home. I am hoping to get home in time to allow us to go out and celebrate St Patty's at our favorite local Irish Pub. Perhaps Rach will go along with some flirty fun while we are out tonight and make the men there green with envy!

I know I haven't posted in some time and I was looking at the results of our latest poll - Our Erotic Personalities (see below). I was was not too surprised at the results.

The Cuckold was about clearly in the lead. I guess if you write about the Hotwife lifestyle, that only makes sense. It also wasn't any real big surprise that 'The Watcher' was the second most named personality:

The Watcher finds ultimate sexual thrills in the simple act of watching. They don’t have to be watching sex—just anything that hints at being sexual. The Watcher is content to see people undress, kiss, fondle, masturbate, spank, get tied up, and whatever else might be construed as sexual. Listening to people making love in the next room would not bother The Watcher in the least. They are compelled to watch whether permission has been granted or not and this is sometimes a blurry line they straddle. The Watcher typically owns an impressive porn collection. Prior lovers who didn’t understand The Watcher may have complained that the watching overruled the participating in some sexual circumstances.

I actually thought The Watcher described me and I haven't quite figured out where I went wrong. I say that lightly because, as I've said before, I don't really like defining myself as a Cuckold. To me, that has always had a bit of a negative connotation reminding me of something involving humiliation. I don't know, perhaps I've just watched too much bad porn where the poor guy is humiliated while his wife/lover tells him what "a nice cock the guy has...better than yours...he can fuck me like you can't...." and I've just not subscribed to that. While some of those thoughts may be in my head somewhere, to me, it is more about Rach experiencing new sexual encounters - good ones of course and perhaps even thoughts of giving her something I can't - but not necessarily better or some attempt to make up for my own personal insecurities. I just want her to feel and be sexy. Allowing her to flirt and experience other men definitely makes her more confronting of her appearance and the increased confidence she has gain has, in turn, made her feel and act more sexy than ever before.

I think, for me, it is having the sexy, hot wife that I find intriguing. I don't go so far as to call her a trophy, but I definitely feel blessed that I have a wife so physically stunning. I want others to know what a gorgeous woman she is. Not only is she incredibly intellingent, sexy and beautiful, she is erotic and desirous of sexual adventure and experiences. To have such a wife, in my mind, makes me the envy of men everywhere. While they might have a chance at a brief encounter with her, it is ultimately me who ends up going home with her. Somewhere in my mind, that is what I derive a great deal of pleasure in. Perhaps it is an ego boost for me...being the guy that everyone says, "Damn, that guy is one lucky SOB". Of course, I do find great pleasure in simply watching Rach have erotic fun. To see her in the throws of a mind-blowing orgasm with another man, albeit just one at this point, is quite exciting and the ultimate in erotic fantasy come true. It is this combination, boosting my ego and seeing her sexually liberated and intrigued that makes me The Watcher - even if my poll results say I am a Cuckold!

The hotwife perspective from a lover of wives Part 1

2008-03-11T12:15:00.000-07:00

Sorry we've been away for a couple weeks. Life keeps us busy, ya know? LOL

We receive quite a bit of email from friends of our blog. One of the people we've been communicating with is a man that, I think it is safe to say, is a lover of other men's wives. We've had some conversations with him about what it is that motivates or causes a single guy to explore having a relationship with a couple. Primarily, and naturally, the focus of his reasons are on the woman in the relationship - something I think is central to the theme of having a hot wife. It's all about her.

He attempts to explain to us some of the main motives that he has felt when having sex with a married woman while her husband was either watching or participating. Originally, I know that he wanted to elaborate on this topic and write a small article for us to print. However, like us, life has been busy and he has not found the time to expand. So, here, over the next few postings, is a short list of what intrigues him about having sex with a hotwife.

I really admire women that are sexually liberal - women that think outside of the box when it comes to sex. This is a healthy and friendly admiration. It excites me and ultimately fuels my desire to experience sex with such a woman. Openly accepting some form of non-monogamy is not mainstream. So, when a woman openly accepts it, it shows that she is willing to explore her sexuality and human sexuality in general.

When I say openly, I don't necessarily mean "with everyone's knowledge" but certainly with the knowledge and consent of her partner. From what I have read in the book The Monogamy Myth and books by Helen Fisher like Why We Love, humans are socially monogamous but not sexually monogamous. Being sexually monogamous is simply part of most modern cultures. So, when a woman is interested in exploring some form of non-monogamy - be it as a hotwife, in a swinging encounter or in a polyamorous relationship - I feel an interest in talking to her and understanding her more. I feel a desire to experience sex with her. Basically, women that are into these forms of consensual, non-monogamous sex turn me on. This was not always apparent to me, but I do believe that it has always been a motivating factor for me.

Just as I have an interest in women that are non-monogamous, I have an interest in friendship with couples that are sexually open-minded. Basically, even just talking and visiting with such a couple is exciting to me, even if things do not lead to sex.

Both of these first two reasons are reasons that have become apparent to me much more recently. They were not reasons that I fully comprehended early on in my experiences.

Initially, I was simply aware that I was sexually excited by the idea of having sex with an "older woman". I have wanted to experience this "cougar" experience since I was a high school student. So, to me, a woman in her thirties or forties was always someone that had a mysterious draw. It was certainly a motivating factor for me during my first few experiences. I still see women older than 30 as being sexually mature, experienced and in touch with their bodies. Simply put, to me they are quite beautiful and sexy in many, many ways beyond the pure physical.

Have an opinion or want to share a view point about what makes a single man want to be involved with a committed couple? Or perhaps you are a husband or boyfriend of a love that you'd like to see with another man. Maybe you are a committed couple that is looking to experience a second male in your relationship. Whatever your perspective, we'd love to hear your comments. It helps us all learn more about ourselves and what makes us desire a hotwife relationship so much!